Money Moral Dilemma: Should we ask our daughter and her boyfriend to start paying us rent?

whatdayisit

Yes of course they should contribute and unfair for them not to do so.

tomthered

I would say she should automatically offer half of your electricity, gas, water and if they eat with you part or all of the food cost. She should feel ashamed of not contributing towards her parents cost, especially given your financial circumstances

tulipchickuk

Yes, I’m afraid you’re partly responsible for not rausing this earlier.

Missy15

Many years ago, a friend stayed with me for a few weeks whilst the sale of his new flat was going through, he paid  towards food etc, but not " rent"
I was paying a single person's council tax rate however,  and his ex wife reported this.
   I got a letter, and ended up having to pay as if he was " living" with me.
 He did pay the difference without quibble, but it shows you that you can get caught out, even if, as I was, unaware that I was doing anything wrong having him stay for just a few weeks.
Get everything above board, and as a daughter she should be paying something anyway, she knows your circumstances doesn't she?

silvercar

HuckleberryCat said:

You say they have been with  you for 5 months. It would have been better if you had anticipated this, but maybe you didn't think it would take so long; I believe they should pay you at least the cost of them being with you, electricity, food, etc. You can truthfully say you have been glad to help but it has been longer than expected, and your own finances mean that you need them to pay their costs. Next is to decide whether it's 5 months and going forward or just from now on.  I suggest definitely ask for payment from now on. If you don't ask for the full 5 months they have already had, you will come across as generous, and I hope they will appreciate that. Be realistic about the costs you have incurred and charge what it has cost you. By way of comparison, you could check out what it would have cost them to rent instead of stay with you, but you may not want to charge them that because you could be making money from your children, and that generally leaves a bad taste in the mouth.

Agree with this. No one wants to make money out of their children, but if their stay means you are short of cash it is reasonable to ask them to pay the extra costs incurred.

jedav

If you need to claim Universal Credit how can you be expected to afford to pay living expenses for two extra people?

How did it affect your Universal Credit when your daughter was paying rent?  How is that relevant if they were to pay rent now?

What is it costing you extra in bills to have them stay (food, utilities, are they using your car)?  You could ask for help with that.

How would asking them to pay certain bills in lieu of rent affect your Universal Credit?

When I was at university (in the days of grants) I lived at home and got holiday jobs.  I paid "housekeeping" to my mother for my food bills.

Steve_the_Spec

As stated by others - i would ask them to contribute towards any additional costs you are incurring and if you guys are struggling say a little extra would also be appreciated, considering it would of cost them a small fortune to stay elsewhere.

juxon

Yes, you need to have that conversation - it's long overdue. For the best outcome, keep the tone neutral rather than emotional, the content factual, and don't suggest anyone's to blame.

My prediction:  they will move out almost immediately when you raise it.

DannyHotPotato

£120,000 per year combined income?!  Seriously?!  Are you kidding me?!
They want to live free, freeloading on poorer relatives.  That's just greed and narcissism.

MarkyMark1064

Another easy one, the answer is, yes.