Slaying my Debts

Emmy_L

i had the miseries too...up until I ate a very nice,very cheap (asda smart price,lol) bar of choc.
okay,so chocolate cant change the world (my gawd though,i wish it could) but life could actually be a heck of a lot worse...in some way!LOL
Hey M2O LOL @ DD spending all those 2ps on a tatoo...the things our kids do eh?!LOL Whats the home business?

Mupeteer

Hey Buffy, try to be kind to yourself. if it was someone else in your situation what advice would you give them? I'll bet you'd go a whole lot easier on them than you do yourself.

The man thing: I totally sympathise. You deserve better. If he is not prepared to give what you need, cut him loose. There is better out there and someday he'll find you (he just better not be the same one I'm looking for!). I know how hard it is to do that but for your own sanity and to preserve your self respect this is something you have to do.

Big hugs. And I'm here if you need to talk.

mum2one

Mupeteer wrote: »

There is better out there and someday he'll find you (he just better not be the same one I'm looking for!)

Or the one Im looking for..........its either a very long corner, of a bigger fish as eat him!
xx

Buffythedebtslayer

hello everyone,

Today was a MUCH better day.

I slept loads which was good and didn't feel ill. Had no visit from the sis and bf today and Mum was fairly perky too.

I listed five things on Ebay and made some new friends on the single and in debt thread which has made me feel much less weird and freaky.

I also tidied up a bit too.

oh and I deleted that bloke's number. made a decision to forget him. He doesn't want what I want. so time to move on!

Overall I am feeling pretty positive.

heres to a good week of money saving

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

chevalier

Buffythedebtslayer wrote: »

Due work not giving me an office I need to rearrange things here so I can work at home more....so i have been looking at furniture on Argos......

oh tempation never ends!

cheers tho, i welcome all ideas
xxxx

www.freecycle.org DON'T BUY WHAT YOU CAN GET FOR FREE:D

chevalier

Hi Buffy
I have just read all of your thread. All the ups and downs of it. I have a few observations.

1) you get really down on yourself when you overspend. BUT even if your debt is the same as last year, then IT HASN'T GOT ANY WORSE, which it would have done if you hadn't tightened your belt to a certain extent.

2) Ok this one is hard. BUT sorry as I am about the loss of your rat and the fish, I would strongly advise that you don't buy replacements. That way your feed bills will be a bit less, and that can be put into replacing your vets money.

3) Men can be a pain in the do da can't they. I had a bf like your Mr number 2. We went out on and off for 4 years. During that time he split up with me several times, and I always took him back. But in the end the fourth time we
split I told him that was that, I would not be taking him back. Not two weeks later I heard from a mutual friend that he regretted splitting up with me!!!!! I said tough you know what, and not longer after met my now OH of 12 years. What I am trying to say that by investing so much emotional energy in a no hoper, you can miss your soulmate, because you are not REALLY REALLY looking for him.

4) I would second other posters who have said to leave your cards at home. And why is it cards plural anyway. Surely you only need ONE card for emergencies?:D But also if you have say enough clothes why are you going in clothes shops? Sorry if this sounds a bit funny but if you were addicted to chocolate would you go into somewhere that sold your drug of choice if you were trying to give up? Same with clothes.

5) Ref ebay amazon etc. I have a rule that I can only buy stuff of there, if I have earned the same amount on there. Means that my ebay purchase are sort of free.

6) I noticed that you go another job. I hope the tutoring goes well. But I was going to say when you were toying with this idea that you should be counting your Avon job as your second job and treating it professionally because of this. Again sorry if I am saying it the wrong way, but I am not very good with words some times. So treat the prep for Avon the same way as you would prep for your class work. By ensuring eg things like the books are always out on the same day and collected on the same day, it gives your customers faith in you, ie that it is worth buying from you because you will always turn up. I had an Avon lady start by my old place, she came once and never bothered again.

7) If you have got this far and not got hacked off then thank you. My final thought is if you keep getting head aches and migraines, it may not just be stress, it may also be that chocolate sets it off. So as one of your challenges is to lose some weight, you might want to combine that with giving up chocolate for a couple of weeks. If you still get headaches/migraines then it is not the chocolate, but at least you will have been very good. But if you get no headaches etc, then you may have discovered your trigger for these.

have a great holiday whatever you do
chev

OliveOyl_2

what she says ^^^^^^

Glad you had a good day yesterday, hope to day goes just as well

chevalier

hope the fact that you are not online means that you either asleep still or that you are doing something far more interesting than surfing on here!
chev

Buffythedebtslayer

Chevailer you post was brilliant.

thank you xxxx I can't believe someone bothered to read my diary and give such good advice.

I am really touched. that sounds so naff but i hope you know what I mean!

thank you so much

xxxxxxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

Been thinking loads today. Brain may explode.

Was a bit upset, wanted to speak to a friend but couldn't get hold of her till earlier tonight. It was fine once I did speak to her. I think once i have been stuck indoors plus the sister thing it just made me think about where my life is going and why when you read my diary its full of things I say I want but never really do properly.

I have also spent tonight looking at other posters, it is said often on here that there are some amazing people on this board and the forums. I cannot believe how people cope. looking after families, having small children studying, working, doing extra jobs, managing on tiny amounts of money.

I wish I could make excuses or give reasons but there aren't any. I am a single thirty something women who is in a job she doesn't like in debt due pretty much to be sucked in and actually if I am honest having a distinct dislike for hard work.

Don't get me wrong, I know I am not a failure. I know that in my life I have handled many things and I have coped. I don't feel as though I am exactly coping now. Its just a hamster wheel, work pay debts, watch tV, make sure Mum is ok, ignore sister, miss other sister, rarely see friends.

I guess it is the shock of the holidays. There was such a constant pressure of things that had to be done and even now I am getting e mails (!) Now I have some time to think. It is ironic that when I found this site I was on summer holidays. space in my head to get me off the treadmill and wonder where I was going.

Now a year later almost I wonder what I have been doing and how come I haven't actually got any where.

well that's not strictly true as Chevailer said my debts aren't worse. I can't believe some one rad the whole thing. What a whinney mess it is!

but I haven't not really. I am living in the holidays. five weeks out of a year, I know its alot:o but when I am at work thats it, no friends no social life early evenings are a myth, school functions, reports, extra work, night mare marking. i know why i spend its my only outlet, having things as a subsistute for having a life.

trouble is I am very well paid. I simply wouldn't be able afford to repay my debts if I left and got another job. I MUST stick it out.