PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING

Hello Forumites! In order to help keep the Forum a useful, safe and friendly place for our users, discussions around non-MoneySaving matters are not permitted per the Forum rules. While we understand that mentioning house prices may sometimes be relevant to a user's specific MoneySaving situation, we ask that you please avoid veering into broad, general debates about the market, the economy and politics, as these can unfortunately lead to abusive or hateful behaviour. Threads that are found to have derailed into wider discussions may be removed. Users who repeatedly disregard this may have their Forum account banned. Please also avoid posting personally identifiable information, including links to your own online property listing which may reveal your address. Thank you for your understanding.

First time buyer but hate the house

Me and my partner just bought our first home. We waited 5 months to get in and thought we loved it. We knew it needed some work to get it how we wanted it. It is day 2 and I really don’t like the house. It feels like the estate agents gave us the keys to a completely different house. I feel like our deposit was too high, leaving us with not much money. I’m not sure what to do now. My partner loves it whereas I feel like we should have paid a lower deposit for a newer house. If we were to sell and buy a smaller home, what would happen with the mortgage, and what happens to the surplus? Could we pay out the mortgage? I just don’t think this house or being a homeowner is for me 
«1345

Comments

  • lika_86
    lika_86 Posts: 1,736
    Name Dropper First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Post
    Forumite
    If your partner loves it then is there a chance that after the initial stress and chaos of moving that you will fall back in love with it too? 

    It sounds like it might just be that the thought of living in a house that needs work is what doesn't appeal right now. Is the work needed significant or will small, cheap changes alter how you feel about it in the meantime? Painting walls and kitchen units could give the place a much needed face-lift in the short term that makes it much more yours.
  • K_9981
    K_9981 Posts: 16
    First Post Name Dropper
    Forumite
    lika_86 said:
    If your partner loves it then is there a chance that after the initial stress and chaos of moving that you will fall back in love with it too? 

    It sounds like it might just be that the thought of living in a house that needs work is what doesn't appeal right now. Is the work needed significant or will small, cheap changes alter how you feel about it in the meantime? Painting walls and kitchen units could give the place a much needed face-lift in the short term that makes it much more yours.
    Hello, my partner said the same thing but I just can’t see it happening. When we viewed the house, it had everything we wanted but it’s just seems to different. I feel so disappointed and stressed that this is how I feel moving into a first home. 

    It needs a rewire which we loved the house so much we agreed we could do it. But it also needs plastering after , kitchen/bathroom update, skirting boards need replacing, and a lot of paint work. I think you are right about it not feeling appealing, I didn’t think of it in that way ☺️

    I feel so depressed and at the time it didn’t feel far away from my family (only being 12 minute drive away) but now it just feels like a lifetime away from them. I just dread going back and don’t know what to do without hurting my partners feelings. 
  • K_9981
    K_9981 Posts: 16
    First Post Name Dropper
    Forumite
    This isn't unusual at all, in fact it's quite normal .
    Get one room just how you want it and start making it home, give it 12-18 months and see how you feel .

    Don't forget lenders don't like lending  if selling within 6 months so although conveyancing can take some time your buyers pool will be limited for now ....but give it time 
    Thank you. If we did wait and sell it for something cheaper, I just don’t know how that will work with the mortgage which is causing me more stress 
  • It sounds like you are a little overwhelmed by the new house, I hope you don't mind me saying that.  As BabyBlade41 has said, its actually not unusual to feel this way, there are many threads on this forum that have said the same.

    It sounds like the house is liveable as is but needs work so just concentrate on one room at a time and make it how you want it.  When you way the house needs a re-wire, does it really? How were the previous owners living there?  I bought a ex council 1950s house that needed a re-wire according to the survey, I never got around to it in the 10 years I lived there.

    If you truly want to change houses again you will need to factor in the costs of moving, how much did the solicitor etc cost this time?  Also you won't have the FTB status so that will impact on the finances too.  Have a look at your mortgage and see if you can switch without paying a penalty.

  • K_9981
    K_9981 Posts: 16
    First Post Name Dropper
    Forumite
    You do like the house. You liked it in spring when it was fully furnished.

    Now it's the most miserable time of the year and I guess you've just moved furniture in and not done anything else. You can probably see a few faults that were hidden before and I bet there are a few things maybe your memory wasn't that accurate about. 

    It can be quite depressing when your "dream house" is just an empty, slightly cold dark place. 
    But you both have time and creativity to make it much nicer and individual that the one you viewed.

    Receiving a house isn't as "woo" as receiving a brand new car sadly. You need to get excited about the potential, the little projects you can do on it. Getting it ready for Christmas and summer.

    A cheap, new home may feel like a safer option but you'll very soon get bored and outgrow it. 


    Thank you. The house was probate and it was emptied by the time we had viewed it. It was so clean and I just didn’t really notice anything I disliked like I am now. I feel so silly I didn’t noticed it. It feels huge for two people. I think you’re right, I am now wanting the safer option but in time when our family grows we will outgrow. I can’t help thinking as first time buyers for just us two, we could have started smaller maybe. I don’t know if this is a house I want to start a family in anymore 
  • K_9981
    K_9981 Posts: 16
    First Post Name Dropper
    Forumite
    GixerKate said:
    It sounds like you are a little overwhelmed by the new house, I hope you don't mind me saying that.  As BabyBlade41 has said, its actually not unusual to feel this way, there are many threads on this forum that have said the same.

    It sounds like the house is liveable as is but needs work so just concentrate on one room at a time and make it how you want it.  When you way the house needs a re-wire, does it really? How were the previous owners living there?  I bought a ex council 1950s house that needed a re-wire according to the survey, I never got around to it in the 10 years I lived there.

    If you truly want to change houses again you will need to factor in the costs of moving, how much did the solicitor etc cost this time?  Also you won't have the FTB status so that will impact on the finances too.  Have a look at your mortgage and see if you can switch without paying a penalty.

    I’m so glad I’m not the only person who feels this way. When you hear of people moving into their first home it always sounds like a dream but this has been nothing but feeling overwhelming like you mentioned. It’s a 1930s house, the switches are on the skirting boards so we require a rewire to be safe. I really want to switch or just pay out the mortgage. I’m not sure. 
  • bouicca21
    bouicca21 Posts: 6,493
    First Anniversary Name Dropper First Post
    Forumite
    Perfectly normal to feel like that about a new place.  Just give it a few months and you will feel less overwhelmed.

  • Now it's the most miserable time of the year and I guess you've just moved furniture in and not done anything else. You can probably see a few faults that were hidden before and I bet there are a few things maybe your memory wasn't that accurate about. 

    It can be quite depressing when your "dream house" is just an empty, slightly cold dark place. 
    This is so true. I was so excited throughout the sale process to get the keys to my current house and make it mine, walked in to see just how shabby it was with all the previous owners belongings removed and needing a good deep clean. I just thought what have I done. To top it off the central heating didn't work properly after they put back the original thermostat so it was more than slightly cold and miserable. But we got through that.
Meet your Ambassadors

Categories

  • All Categories
  • 341.9K Banking & Borrowing
  • 249.7K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
  • 449.2K Spending & Discounts
  • 234K Work, Benefits & Business
  • 606.2K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
  • 172.5K Life & Family
  • 246.9K Travel & Transport
  • 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
  • 15.8K Discuss & Feedback
  • 15.1K Coronavirus Support Boards