Advice MIL died without leaving a will

Dave_5150

Time to start court procedings? Until then her delaying tactics are actually working.

Your last letter raised at least a dozen points and gave a deadline 7 days to respond. She replied after a fortnight and did not resolve a single point !!

poppystar

Even if what she was saying were true…it was her responsibility as administrator to secure the property so her fault if things went missing. Hope she’s not away next week spending the estate’s money! 

tooldle

If the coin collection is hers, give it back. One less point to argue over. 

thriftytwosome

"My brother’s household finances are very strong- he doesn’t need the money." 

This comment in the reply is a bit worrying, it looks as though she is trying to justify something.

Flugelhorn

thriftytwosome said:

"My brother’s household finances are very strong- he doesn’t need the money." 

This comment in the reply is a bit worrying, it looks as though she is trying to justify something.

agree - once they get into the "someone doesn't NEED the money" it means they are up to something.

honestly the letter is a load of tosh - contents are £500 at the most . correspondence with Frankie Howard? a few £££ maybe. candlesticks? definitely less than she paid for them

paul2louise

thriftytwosome said:

"My brother’s household finances are very strong- he doesn’t need the money." 

This comment in the reply is a bit worrying, it looks as though she is trying to justify something.

Yes my husband is ok financially while he is working but he is 60 and wants to retire. I only work part time and we stil have some to look after. She has always been skint and paying off loans. MIL was always gifting her money to pay debt off. Do we start getting petty about that. Giving her petrol money if she ever visited. Flugelhorn said:

thriftytwosome said:

"My brother’s household finances are very strong- he doesn’t need the money." 

This comment in the reply is a bit worrying, it looks as though she is trying to justify something.

agree - once they get into the "someone doesn't NEED the money" it means they are up to something.

honestly the letter is a load of tosh - contents are £500 at the most . correspondence with Frankie Howard? a few £££ maybe. candlesticks? definitely less than she paid for them

We both laughed about the Frankie Howard's letter. She is delusional. There was no left over food. SIL didn't seemed concerned about anything when we cleared her bungalow apart from filling her van with as much stuff as she could get in it. The candle sticks are a joke. OH says she has that much crap in her house that all these missing things are probably in a box she has never opened in her cluttered house. But if she was so worried about them why wait 3 years to ask about them. 

tooldle

thriftytwosome said:

"My brother’s household finances are very strong- he doesn’t need the money." 

This comment in the reply is a bit worrying, it looks as though she is trying to justify something.

I took this comment to refer to the partial distribution request, with it being the same paragraph. 

tetrarch

There appears to be no way back with this woman. There is nothing to be gained with winning all the little battles on the detail. 

I would just add up everything she has a probem with and make an offer to "compensate" the estate. Remembering that she'll only get half. 

The only real sticky problem would appear to be the coin collection and whether the sentimental value is worth any kind of fight over and above its monetary value. If it were me I'd photograph every coin and and ask her to select the ones she wants (this is more like a divorce than an estate distribution)

Best of luck

Regards

Tet

Sea_Shell

At this stage, I'd be looking to agree to waive, say £1000 of inheritance, to enable it to be finalised.

As you're effectively losing interest on your full inheritance every day this drags on.

Especially when you can get 6% on a fix deal currently.

£100k @ 6% and you're potentially losing £500 a month!!

Just do a deal and get it done.  Ok, so she might "win", but the time has come to maybe lose the battle, but win the war.

poppystar

I agree it might be better to offer half of the value of the disputed things and get interest on it but I think the bigger issue is whether the money is still there. It sounds far more like she is dragging it all out for bigger reasons than the value of some possessions and she’d then find some other reason not to distribute. Unfortunately she holds all the cards here as she has control of the money unless and until OP starts what might be expensive court proceedings.