MeandO's money-shuffling

MeandO

This past week was one I don't wish to repeat. OH has been unwell for a while and ended up in hospital last week with breathing difficulties. His oxygen levels were very low and his skin was grey, I honestly thought he had gone at one point. He's home now on various meds but is still quite unwell and improvement is slow.
So, I spent 3 days at various hospitals last week whilst still trying to work as I have very little annual leave left and am now low on flexi hours after having to take unscheduled time off so am trying to build that up again. OH's phone also stopped working whilst he was in hospital - a problem with the sim it now transpires - so I had to buy a temporary disposable sim and top it up so he could contact me. He has also had offers on his house whilst in hospital after it has been on the market for several months. Luckily, he had registered me as an approved contact with the EA due to his irregular hours in work and being uncontactable during that time, so I was able to deal with the agent and offers for him.
We were also meant to be going to see my parents for a few days but obviously had to cancel. I need to find time to go there soon though as my car was booked in for a repair there, I have my Mum's birthday gifts, items I've bought for Christmas for my parents to give various people and I ordered and collected some clothing for my Mum which needs to be returned in a couple of weeks if it's not suitable. I'm feeling really stressed in trying to fit everything in at the moment.

I've also had to deal with the ex changing his plans for having DS last minute and a starving DS when I picked him up at 9pm from the Ex's the day OH was hospitalised as he 'wasn't expecting to have to feed him' that day. My poor boy asked me if he could 'ask for a favour' when driving him back at 9pm. The favour was to 'have some tea when we get home as Dad wasn't expecting to feed me today.' I felt so awful for him, it broke my heart. The Ex, of course, didn't go without and it's not like they don't have a fully stocked fridge or supermarket round the corner. He also took him to the sporting club to 'train' that night (on an empty stomach) when he's not supposed to be going due to his broken bone. I am absolutely disgusted by the ex's behaviour. If I raise it, he tells everyone I am being controlling in telling him what to do, turns it on me and then he manipulates DS into believing I am being nasty to him, so DS then asks me why I'm being horrible to his Dad or just won't tell me anything in future. I am utterly powerless to change this for DS and that's what hurts so much.

DS also seems to have shot up a few more inches and was down to two pairs of joggers that fit him, so I've given him two of the pairs I'd bought him for Christmas. He was over the moon, bless him. I have ordered two more pairs and two hoodies all in the sale with and extra 20% off code too + 'loyalty points.' I have nearly £60 built up in points for this sport store now so will be able to use that towards DS's birthday in Feb. I paid for the above on the CC but transferred it from the gift pots straight away, along with some money spent on a few smaller bits for others to give to him. I also ordered some items from another shop for my dad for Christmas, that too has been paid off immediately.

The UC payment was received last week and has been split between the car pot and the gifts pot. The backpay I should receive this payday will mainly have to go to the gifts pot as it's looking a little low now.

badmemory

Did I misunderstand.  DS was with his father at a mealtime & he didn't feed him but fed the rest of them.  Aren't there 4 of them anyway.  If I have understood then frankly what an absolute a*******.  If he lived there amost of the time I would think that could be a reason to call out social services.

MeandO

You didn’t misunderstand, bad memory.  I doubt they all sat down to a meal together, but DS didn’t have any food from after school until 9pm as he wasn’t expected there that night due to the emergency I had to deal with. He is with me more than he is with his father, thankfully. Unfortunately, I have had to contact SS before a few years ago about a different matter concerning the ex’s behaviour towards DS, but somewhat ironically, the ex works for them and they all think the sun shines out of his backside so it got me nowhere. If you knew the job he did, you would be absolutely floored. How he got where he is, I do not know. Well, I do - he has the gift of the gab and lies through his teeth. A manipulative narcissist hidden in plain sight. There couldn’t possibly be someone more unsuitable for that job. 

badmemory

Well all I can say is that your DS at least has a different example in his life & will "get it".  Perhaps the ones we should really worry about are the ones who have no escape from him & are seeing that sort of behaviour as normal.  They too eventually will come to understand.

MeandO

Back to money saving now and I’m doing much better than last month with two weeks until payday. The credit card is being used but immediately paid off and I have plenty left in the groceries & spends budget as long as I keep an eye on the spending. 

I cooked roast chicken & veggies for DS tonight, I had some leftover risotto from Saturday. Lunch for me was leftovers from last night’s tea as OH isn’t eating much and I wasn’t very hungry. I picked up some milk, carrots and a few other bits in the supermarket today and found some YS sausages which I’ll use to make a sausage pasta dish for DS tomorrow. It came to under £9 which I paid for with change from my purse. We shouldn’t need much else his week, other than some snacks for DS if he manages to eat through what we have in. 

MeandO

I’ve been awake since 3.30am this morning, tossing and turning with sleep evading me so I’m shattered today and counting down the minutes until I can climb in my bed. 

A couple of spends to report today, firstly a quick trip to HB for shampoo, conditioner, adhesive medical bandage stuff for DS, mints and finally crisps, just because I really fancied some. I also popped to Sainsbo’s and bought some YS sausages for the freezer. I was looking for a specific cake that OH has been fancying despite not eating much at the moment, but they didn’t have any so it was just the sausages that came home with me. 

An item of DS’s has sold on eBay making him just over £7, so have sent that to his bank account. I just need to wrap and post it now. One more item for OH for Christmas arrived today and I’m expecting a couple more parcels this week. I’m doing quite well with the Christmas shopping so far, I need to take stock and see what I have bought so far when DS isn’t around and can’t peek.

MeandO

A second of DS's ebay items sold making another £7 ish in profit, so funds have been sent to his account and both items have been posted.

The water bill DD has been dropped by £3 a month going forward but the energy DD has gone up by £5 a month to prevent a shortfall - apparently - so swings and roundabouts there. 
£28.01 spent on items we'd run out of or low on in Asda yesterday, plus a couple of treats for DS. There's 10 days until payday so I should have enough to last us until then.

I need to start shopping around for my car insurance this week as it's due next month. I also want to research the best price of my next injection pen as I've just done my 2nd jab on the 5mg and will need to go up to the next pen in a couple of weeks and it now gets pricey with Voy. Weight loss is at 1st 10.7lbs since June, 13lbs of that is weight lost in the 5 weeks I've been on mounjaro.

Sarahwithlove

That's crazy that your ex can get away with behaviour like that. Who doesn't find something for their kid to eat just because they weren't expecting him. I'm sure he could have given him something. Have you considered contacting the SS for the next area over and explaining your concerns regarding him working for them and you don't feel it can be adequately managed by the team. In my LA your local team can't manage a case involving you or a family member. 

Have you used med express for your jab? If not let me know and I can send you my £40 off code. To change provider you just need to take a picture of the prescription sticker on your current box. I switch around all the time. 

MeandO

Thanks Sarahwithlove. To be honest, I know it would just exacerbate issues now and probably make things worse for both DS and myself so i just try and make sure DS knows what he does and doesn't have to put up with from the ex. 

Unfortunately medexpress won't allow me to use a referral code now as I am already registered with them and ordered the first 2.5mg dose from them. They messed the order up completely then refused to prescribe when I'd made two complaints, so I'm technically and existing customer, sorry! 

MeandO

I am starting to really dislike old houses now. I moved an item from under my desk today and found it covered in mould, probably because it had been up against the internal of an outside wall for a while. Anyway, the item (related to my job) has been sorted out and mostly thrown away with the bit I need to keep sprayed with mould and mildew remover. I've also sprayed and cleaned under the desk and used some black mould remover on a few spots on the grout in the shower and metal bathroom blind. All has come up ok, but my hands and my house now stinks of bleach, so I'm freezing with all the large windows open.
I've sorted most of the recycling and dusted DS's room and cleaned the stair bannisters. This is such a dusty house no sooner have I cleaned that it needs dusting again.
DS's sports boots have also had a scrub and are drying off outside. I think there was more mud on his boots than left on the field.

The last of the orders I was expecting has arrived today, so that's my Dad's Christmas present sorted. I need to find somewhere else to stash stuff now as my wardrobe is rammed and there really is nowhere else to store things. I want to go through my wardrobe and get rid of some clothes I haven't work in a long time, so that will be a start to clear some room.

I'm going to try and get to a DIY store later and tale half of my under sink pipework with me to buy whatever new bits are needed. I have resisted calling a plumber as I suspect it's an easy job I can do myself, I just need to get the correct parts. There's been a washing up bowl under the sink this week to catch any leaks but I could do with getting it done. All of the cleaning products that usually live under there are camped out on the utility room worktop, so everything feels cluttered at the moment!