Prosperous soul, mortgage neutrality & creativity Year 2

savingholmes

Thanks EH, Jwil, Lucielle, Beanie, WD, Blackcats, KK, Mark, MF and Skint

I had a nice time away overall. I did the picture above of the bandstand. A small and large version of an aqueduct which you can see in the background.

I bought a Cosmo mag and created a whole load of collage pictures to share with my therapist. It had a surprising number of relevant articles - and I might buy it again in future. I used the words and some of the pictures as background - painting out some of the words and keeping others - including arranged out of context. Themes included identity, relationships, intrusive thoughts, ASD, food/diet/health etc. I did a line drawing style painting of female thinking style faces over the top of three of the collages, and then did a fuller painting of signposts and a girl hugging her knees with one hand and holding her head with the other while sat on the floor (to go with the intrusive thoughts one). I borrowed inspiration from the net on those painted drawings - but tweaked them slightly to make them my own.

I also painted a slightly caricature self portrait - but recognisably me over a more hopeful collage that still referenced some of my inner struggles while also focusing on positives. For the self portrait I used a photo of me from a few years ago - I got the colouring really well and caught the outline well even down to my dress - but my smile was too cheesy and my eyes slightly too big but in it's own way it worked. I may display that one in my new home once I move as I am proud of it. 

savingholmes

I nipped home (an hour away) on the Tuesday as a way of making myself go out - and enjoyed the gorgeous Autumn colours. I picked up my mortgage form and my ID stuff for doing a check but couldn't make myself do it while away. I finally completed both today. Even buying the magazine - I did in my home town. I think that reflects how overwhelmed I was feeling as I wouldn't normally come home while away - and I normally would go out. It has underlined that I need to book some more time off as soon as reasonably practical - partly to make up for the two lost days I planned to have off just before I went away. I've been very much burning myself out.

It took me until the Thursday to even be able to write much about my internal dialogue in my journal. I wrote a spoof review for my cottage. If I tell you I arrived and the owner greeted me with 'the key does work you have to jiggle it a bit' and then bear in mind that I struggle with claustrophobia and struggle with keys at the best of times - it's not surprising one night I had a panic attack about not being able to get out if there was a fire which combined with my meds keeping me awake meant I didn't sleep until dawn... I had to go round the cottage and check every window to see if I could break it in an emergency. The upstairs opening restrictor while probably required for a holiday cottage didn't make me feel any better about my escape chances... Then if I add that two days in I had to ask for a bedside table lamp as she only supplied a torch (required for said emergency exit) and it probably sums things up.

I also struggled with feelings of being overlooked as since I could see into the owner's dwelling that meant she could see into mine. Definitely need to check things like that out more next time I book anywhere away. Thankfully I was almost fully absorbed by painting - including when I should have been sleeping - and the time flew by. There was also no real wifi in the lounge - and by Thursday morning I'd used up my allowance - ironically on an unwanted video call to a relative!

I got rung about wider family drama while I was away which wasn't the best. Ironically I left my cottage a night early to go and have a sleepless night at closest sis's house so she could go to an appointment which due to hospital incompetence didn't go to plan. I had a fun time making art with three very neurodiverse littlies before escaping to collect my still flea-ridden cat and making it home... I am so ready to go back to work Monday not!!!  

The good news is that my only spends while away were on Mr A (food) and Am**** (art related) and the single magazine so very much stayed in budget. I've updated my money today and cleared my CCs again of recent spends. I now need to make myself listen to some voicemails about the move received while I was away.

jwil

Glad you had a good break overall despite all the challenges.  Good that you had lots of time to focus on art.

We've still got the little feline friends too.  We've never had an issue like this the whole 17 years she's been with us!

beanielou

No bedside light. 

No wi-Fi. 

That’s so unacceptable. 

savingholmes

jwil said:

Glad you had a good break overall despite all the challenges.  Good that you had lots of time to focus on art.

We've still got the little feline friends too.  We've never had an issue like this the whole 17 years she's been with us!

I'm glad it's not just me on the little critters - I don't remember ever having such a prolonged issue before. The applied ointment is doing something as they are slow moving but it doesn't seem to be killing them off which is irritating. The cat wanted prolonged cuddles after having been away - but I didn't want any bites! They were moving all over his head yesterday. It absolutely gives me the heebie jeebies. Combed out more today. He's due at the vets for vaccinations on Thursday or Friday so I'm hoping to get better quality, longer lasting treatments for fleas and worms at the same time.

lucielle

Sorry to hear the holiday wasn’t quite what it could’ve been. Poor puss cat, hope the new treatment works. 

L

Merlin's_Beard

Glad you managed to get some art time even if it wasn't exactly the break you needed.

Poor kitkat, and yes definitely if you've been using non prescription get something that works when you're at the vets.

Blackcats

Interesting quirks at the holiday cottage.  Glad that overall you got some rest and recuperation .

savingholmes

beanielou said:

No bedside light. 

No wi-Fi. 

That’s so unacceptable. 

Thanks Beanie. That together with the line dried sandpaper towels and similar sandpaper texture duvet cover. I had to keep reminding myself that I had booked one of the cheapest cottages there was during a prime holiday week and so should have been for warned. I'm still debating leaving a review - but don't want to sabotage her earnings by telling people what I really thought... My BIL suggested that I text/email her but reluctant to do that either... 

lucielle said:

Sorry to hear the holiday wasn’t quite what it could’ve been. Poor puss cat, hope the new treatment works. 

L

The rooms were good sizes and I made lots of art so it wasn't all bad. The scenery from some of the windows included hills. She had good heating which I made lots of use of.

I got home and my house was 12 degrees!! It took hours to warm up to 19 in the hall, 17 in the front room. I've therefore had the heating on part of today as due to the cat don't want to have my elec blanket around him and then be forced to wash it again. The cat is determined to make up for lost cuddles and petting. Can't blame him really. Just wish he'd shed his visitors.

I'm all caught up on diaries now. I've even listened to my voicemails. I nipped to Mr A - bought another mag, some treat food for me, the cat and door knockers and picked up some meds. The patches were still out of stock from a month ago but I have alternatives I just hate them.

beanielou

I would text or email. 

It’s really not on.