Diary of a 30-something idiot

foxandflowers

SuzeQStan said:

Hey Fox - what kind of stuff is gonng on Mr Fox’s credit card?  Do you have sight of the statements?

He's given me the credit card. I've told him to report it lost so they send out a new one, and then it won't be stored on any of his banking details. It's mostly been on nonsense, ASOS and similar. I have paid it off twice before but it was maxed out again without him saying anything. And then he came to me and said he needed to give it to me, because he was incapable of seeing the available funds without thinking that they could be spent. Which I suppose is a sort of LBM in itself, now he knows he is not a credit card person. Just irritating that it's got to be paid off again only 6 months later. I am lucky it has such a poor limit. 

enthusiasticsaver

Why not let Mr Foxes card default?  He does not have any income and there is no point protecting his credit history. Pay it off your debt instead or put it into a F and F fund so you can get that debt off your back sooner than 10 years or whatever  the repayment period is supposed to be.  

foxgloves

I have to say I'd be inclined to do that too, @enthusiasticsaver. There's more than enough debt here already without paying off somebody else's unplanned credit card debt again. And then I would cut the card up.
F

stymied

I’m clueless about campervans - is that the same number of seats you have in the old one?
Shame about not being able to get more for the car 😟 x

stymied

If any of the ASOS etc stuff is still within the return period you could send it back & use the balance to pay for child #3s birthday. Easier way to extra funds than Vinted

foxandflowers

5 belted seats is better than what we have in the current van, but the current van has a lot more space and a full kitchen inside etc. We use that less than I thought though - mostly just for tea, or reheating something I cooked at home. Harder now I'm GF as I can't bring pre-made pasta with me. GF pasta is horrible. 

All maxed out last year unfortunately and currently included in my total debt outstanding amount. Have not separated out the debt outstanding into his & mine, as we are married, so its all one and the same. My initial thought is that it's worth paying it off, not only to get back the £10 a month, but also to have as a locked away emergency card.

Stepchange reckon we ought to be debt free in 26 years or so... my current calc has it as 15 years, but I want to get it gone within 7. Which may well be impossible, but then again, maybe not. Retention payments & annual pay rises should help towards that, as does the side hustling etc. Only another 22 days until payday, and thereby only another 15 days or so until payslips are posted and I can see what my March pay will be. Am expecting about £250 for retention - any more would be a lovely bonus. 

I've just about got myself caught back up after going off the rails in December, the only bill I am now behind on is my own phone bill. And realistically I could probably sort that out in one go at the end of this month, so I start the new financial year on a good forward facing foot. 

The hardest thing about getting out of debt is changing my mindset. It's been rather good fun colouring in things as I pay them off, and updating my signature. I may start doing Tilly Tidies into my safetynet EF at the end of each day too. I need to keep myself motivated, and after the weekend I've had that is proving very difficult. The impulsive part of me is saying "you've already effed the month up, why bother continuing to try now?" and the newly sensible part of me is saying "shut up, you made goals and you're not going to cave now. a slip up does not mean an entire month's set back". 

To be fair, the impulsive voice is also very stupid, as it is bored of growing out the mullet and has been whispering I should shave my head... not entirely sure what that would achieve aside from it taking a zillion years LONGER to grow out my hair. So I am trying my very best not to listen to it, as it is almost always entirely wrong. 

MFWannabe

Sorry if this has been asked before but could your husband do some online studies such as prolific? Will have to bring in some extra pounds to help pay off his credit card? 

MFWannabe

foxandflowers said:

@Petal88 my plans are all over the place now. Initially we were going to keep the van, but sell the car, and get a cheaper car and then have a few £1000 leftover. Now the car will be sold, and its pretty much a straight swap for the Caddy Maxi (including paying a years worth of insurance) and then when we sell the Big Van it will hopefully get between 15-20k. 
So assuming the low end of that - I would split as follows:

EF £3000
Gift Fund £1000
Mini Fox clothes £400
Bicycles x2 £500
Mr Fox Credit Card £300
Mayglothling £670
Vehicle Pot £2000 (insurance, repairs, upgrades etc)
General small debt £1000 (clearing all the small debts, leaving only 2 big friend loans & stepchange - also debating paying off my phone contract so it goes down to £11 a month instead of £35? It's £570 odd to pay off the phone in entirety, otherwise I am in contract until June 2026 which is a really long time away!!!)  
Friend loan £1000
Home reno £4000 - electrics, garden bits, overboarding ceilings, paint, stair carpet, retractable washing line, rubbish removals, etc. 

Leaves me £1130 that isn't accounted for. We had vague plans to take the younger kids to IoW camping for a week in summer, and would take the Caddy for that - it being able to fit under the height restrictions would be fab, as the Sprinter absolutely does not. Could probably use that remaining money for a holiday, but I'm not sure if we should, or if we should go next year. The older boy is 15 next month, and I don't think he will be interested in coming away with us for much longer, so I would love to be able to go away with him one more time. 

If on some off chance, we got the higher end of the scale, I would chuck extra in the EF and pay extra off debt I think. 

Be careful that the money doesn’t just get spent leaving you with exactly the same amount of debt and nothing else to sell 😞

Do you really need £3000 emergency fund? Would it get frittered away? 

Gift fund £1000? What is this for? You could use this to pay off debt 

£400 on clothes? Look on vinted etc. you don’t need to spend £400 and I’m not sure how young your child is but probably won’t be long before they would grow out of them anyway? 

Bikes x 2 £500 again look on local selling sites but even if you buy new you don’t need to spend £500

General small debt - what is the other mobile in your payments? Is this also in contract? If not you could drastically reduce this by going sim only as if I remember correctly it costs £36 per month? 

Home Reno do you really need to spend £4000? Look on Facebook market place etc for cheaper items 

Sorry if what I say upsets you but having read your diary it doesn’t seem as if you have control of your spending and the worry is you’ll sell big van and the money will be gone and you’ll still have the same level of debt 😟
Please think very carefully about what you do with the money and pay off as much debt as possible x 

SuzeQStan

Fox I’m really sorry I missed your coeliac diagnosis - that is the last thing you need on top of all this! And agreed GF pasta is dire.

warby68

I too think you should be wary of creating large pots of money for future events when you don't yet have control of your spending and budget. You say how hard it is to change your mindset and the house move money was gone in a flash. Its just too much temptation based on your track record. If I read it correctly your current budget was broken only a few days after you set it, all on discretionary spends.
Its obviously a very tough road to change for you and you have no help on the income side.

With all that in mind, I would say still sell the car and buy another less costly to run one (and not a money pit second van which will be cheap for a reason) and also suitable for you to learn to drive in when the chance arises. The big van I would take off the road for 12 months and accept that holidays are probably a bridge too far this year, lovely as they are. The van is still there and not a pot of cash with a siren call until you have cracked the basics of spending within your income including meeting your debt commitments. Then revisit.

I know this sounds a bit stern and miserable but eventually, if you don't get to grips with the basics, things will get even worse again. Also, its far from unusual to have a lean year for holidays and other luxuries just after buying a new house. People recognise that sometimes you need a little short term pain for long term gain.