Money Moral Dilemma: Is it fair for my parents to penalise me for not having children?

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  • Although it's the parents right to do what they want with it, I think when it comes to their children, they should treat them equally. I do think it is unfair to give one more than the other just because one of them has children. I would definitely mention it, doesn't need to end up in an argument. In my will, I have left my estate equally between my son & daughter and haven't included my grandchildren. I take the view that it's up to my children if they want to pass some onto their children
    The children are being treated equally.  The person who is peeved will inherit exactly the same as his/her brother.  We have no idea of the ages of those concerned and granny and grandpa may be thinking that a boost in finances for their grandchildren will help them as they become or are already adults looking to get on the property ladder for example.

  • Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
  • Doc_N
    Doc_N Posts: 8,261
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    1Ato26Z said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
    Although the likelihood, in reality, is probably that the whole thing’s just fabricated clickbait aimed at attracting traffic and gathering information.
  • I suspect there's more to this than meets the eye. The fact is you feel aggrieved at the way this has been split, and I'm wondering if this is because you sense that your parents favour your brother, or they pressure or criticise you for not having children.

    Your parents can absolutely do what they like with their money, but if this is hurting your feelings then that is what you should speak about. Plunging in with 'you're giving them too much money, it's not fair!' is only likely to cause arguments, whereas telling one parent, whoever is more likely to understand, that your feelings have been hurt and why, in other words being truthful, is more likely to bring you better results. 


  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,487
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    1Ato26Z said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
    OK.
    But it really doesn't matter what anybody else says or thinks.
    The reality is that the author's parents have made their will in the way that suits them.
  • Doc_N
    Doc_N Posts: 8,261
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    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
    OK.
    But it really doesn't matter what anybody else says or thinks.
    The reality is that the author's parents have made their will in the way that suits them.
    The reality is that it's all made up.
  • BooJewels said:
    Something happened a few years ago that I've thought about a few times lately, now my parents are both gone.

    They invited us all over for Sunday dinner as they had something to show us and we were all suitably intrigued.  On the drive was parked a shiny new motorhome and Dad greeted us with "sorry girls, we've spent your inheritance, I hope you don't mind".

    That motorhome took them across Europe a dozen or more times, to places all over the UK - we all had holidays alongside them, my son went away every half term with them etc etc.  One evening post dinner when all 6 of the family, plus 2 dogs were having some hilarity - I think someone had found a well matured bottle of damson gin - my sister raised a glass and thanked them for our inheritance - we were all really enjoying it.

    That's the very best way to enjoy an inheritance - with them!
    Great story!
  • Pollycat
    Pollycat Posts: 34,487
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    Doc_N said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
    OK.
    But it really doesn't matter what anybody else says or thinks.
    The reality is that the author's parents have made their will in the way that suits them.
    The reality is that it's all made up.
    The reality is that it's not (necessarily) made up.
    I've read these MMDs and sometimes the original author has popped up and commented.
    If you think it's all made up, why are you bothering posting?
    Really?

  • Doc_N
    Doc_N Posts: 8,261
    Name Dropper First Post Photogenic First Anniversary
    Forumite
    Pollycat said:
    Doc_N said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Pollycat said:
    1Ato26Z said:
    Parents leave and spread their assets to their children equally by a will.
    Those granparents have no need to make 4 portions, because they only have 2 sons.
    When the time is right the children of those granparents will write a will for their children (grandchildren here), if any, to inherit what they had.
    Comments about having total freedom to do whatever with your money... Yes, it's true. But nobody wants that their heirs experience miseries or anyone else steals their heirs' inheritance.
    Only wealthy people split a portion for good causes or when there's no will and found no heirs or when they make a will with no heirs/offspring.
    Clearly that isn't the opinion of the parents of the author of this MMD.
    There is no inheritance until someone dies.

    I will leave my property/assets as I see fit.
    Relationships will not come into it.
    My money, my choice what happens to it when I'm dead.
    The author asked for the opinion of the people who read the MMD and all have given him feedback. There's no need for you to agree with any of those opinions.
    OK.
    But it really doesn't matter what anybody else says or thinks.
    The reality is that the author's parents have made their will in the way that suits them.
    The reality is that it's all made up.
    The reality is that it's not (necessarily) made up.
    I've read these MMDs and sometimes the original author has popped up and commented.
    If you think it's all made up, why are you bothering posting?
    Really?

    Don't worry - my posts are made up too!   ;)
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