In my 30s and in London - what do I do?

Retireby40

If you can't afford to buy in London you have to accept it and move out of London.

You're in your 30s so all this "I won't see my friends etc". That's not true. You have weekends to see them. Bank Holidays etc.

Plus many of them may have started having families etc so time spent with them will naturally decrease.

If you can't upskill and earn more, then you really have no other option.

Everyone wants big city life, yet that isn't affordable for everyone. I would look at the towns and cities close to London and try get that step on the property ladder. 

Shaztastic3000

Skill up and earn more

RedFraggle

Worth looking at journey times. Norwich may be relatively close to London but the journey into London is the same as from York. Manchester, Birmingham, Sheffield, Leicester are all incredible cities.
I'm from East Anglia and lived in Norwich for ten years and it's beautiful but not a city on my list of places I'd consider living now. Liverpool is a phenomenal city and doesn't take much longer and housing and rents are cheap. 

[Deleted User]

jumblejulia said:

I'm in a very similar situation. Late thirties,work for a charity in London, previously house sharing in London. I've now moved to a village near Reading with a train station. I pay £700 for a 1 bed flat. I've been lucky and had to haggle my landlady down from close to £800. There are still some good deals out there to be had. The fast trains take just over 30 mins to London from here. I'm now saving for a deposit on a flat.
I totally share your dilemma though. It's really rubbish. Single people lose out for sure. 

Sounds good. Hope it works out for you. My Norwich one bed flat is £530pcm plus bills. So that's not really the issue. It's more that I hate being away from friends and family. It's like a witness protection scheme! 

SavingPennies_2

wildbilljones said:

jumblejulia said:

I'm in a very similar situation. Late thirties,work for a charity in London, previously house sharing in London. I've now moved to a village near Reading with a train station. I pay £700 for a 1 bed flat. I've been lucky and had to haggle my landlady down from close to £800. There are still some good deals out there to be had. The fast trains take just over 30 mins to London from here. I'm now saving for a deposit on a flat.
I totally share your dilemma though. It's really rubbish. Single people lose out for sure. 

Sounds good. Hope it works out for you. My Norwich one bed flat is £530pcm plus bills. So that's not really the issue. It's more that I hate being away from friends and family. It's like a witness protection scheme! 

This is the second time you've used this slightly odd phrase and I'm wondering if you have moved to a new city but are trying to continue your previous life? You are bound to feel torn and unhappy if you don't make the effort to integrate into your new city, as it's not really possible to have somewhere cheap to sleep but still have your entire life be based 2 hours away. What have you done in the last year to integrate some of your life into Norwich? I'm not having a go, just trying to understand why you feel it's like a witness protection scheme - you don't have to stay in your flat or have a secret identity?! 

Just to add, you mention not wanting to house share in London, I get that at 35 you want space and independence, what about a share with just 1 other person, might that be a compromise? 

ripplyuk

Retireby40 said:

Everyone wants big city life, yet that isn't affordable for everyone. I would look at the towns and cities close to London and try get that step on the property ladder. 

No they don’t. I wouldn’t live in London if you paid me. 

sheramber

[Deleted User] said:

sheramber said:

It is not a new situation.

20 years ago a colleagues daughter and son in law moved from London to Edinburgh when she became pregnant,  as , despite having two salaries, , they could only afford a small 1 bedroom flat.

House prices have risen over 140% in most UK cities in the last 20 years. Salaries haven't. So, respectfully, I think you're very wrong.  

How can I be wrong about a statement of fact.

sheramber

wildbilljones said:

jumblejulia said:

I'm in a very similar situation. Late thirties,work for a charity in London, previously house sharing in London. I've now moved to a village near Reading with a train station. I pay £700 for a 1 bed flat. I've been lucky and had to haggle my landlady down from close to £800. There are still some good deals out there to be had. The fast trains take just over 30 mins to London from here. I'm now saving for a deposit on a flat.
I totally share your dilemma though. It's really rubbish. Single people lose out for sure. 

Sounds good. Hope it works out for you. My Norwich one bed flat is £530pcm plus bills. So that's not really the issue. It's more that I hate being away from friends and family. It's like a witness protection scheme! 

You'll be even further away from them in Asia.

The grass is not always greener on the other side.

[Deleted User]

sheramber said:

[Deleted User] said:

sheramber said:

It is not a new situation.

20 years ago a colleagues daughter and son in law moved from London to Edinburgh when she became pregnant,  as , despite having two salaries, , they could only afford a small 1 bedroom flat.

House prices have risen over 140% in most UK cities in the last 20 years. Salaries haven't. So, respectfully, I think you're very wrong.  

How can I be wrong about a statement of fact.

This is the kind of stuff I hear from my parents. "It was hard when we first bought a house too". Their first house cost 40k in 1991. Unless they were earning about 4k a year (they weren't), it's entirely incomparable to the situation first-time buyers face now. 

[Deleted User]

SavingPennies_2 said:

wildbilljones said:

jumblejulia said:

I'm in a very similar situation. Late thirties,work for a charity in London, previously house sharing in London. I've now moved to a village near Reading with a train station. I pay £700 for a 1 bed flat. I've been lucky and had to haggle my landlady down from close to £800. There are still some good deals out there to be had. The fast trains take just over 30 mins to London from here. I'm now saving for a deposit on a flat.
I totally share your dilemma though. It's really rubbish. Single people lose out for sure. 

Sounds good. Hope it works out for you. My Norwich one bed flat is £530pcm plus bills. So that's not really the issue. It's more that I hate being away from friends and family. It's like a witness protection scheme! 

This is the second time you've used this slightly odd phrase and I'm wondering if you have moved to a new city but are trying to continue your previous life? You are bound to feel torn and unhappy if you don't make the effort to integrate into your new city, as it's not really possible to have somewhere cheap to sleep but still have your entire life be based 2 hours away. What have you done in the last year to integrate some of your life into Norwich? I'm not having a go, just trying to understand why you feel it's like a witness protection scheme - you don't have to stay in your flat or have a secret identity?! 

Just to add, you mention not wanting to house share in London, I get that at 35 you want space and independence, what about a share with just 1 other person, might that be a compromise? 

No problem. You're correct. I have struggled to leave London behind and I have struggled to throw myself into Norwich life. This is partly due to being introverted but mostly due to the fact that my job is in London. There isn't work in Norwich so it's been impossible to entirely leave London behind. 

And I think sharing with one person might be a good compromise as you say. It feels like a more mature situation. I think, my parents find the idea of two friends flat sharing into their thirties and forties to be absurd, but I think you have to adapt to the times and the lack of opportunities. 

Thank you for your thoughts and suggestions.