The Mental Debt Struggle...

cinnamon123

Sounds like a fabulous night out! Yay for good friends and people who just get us! 

LittleMissDetermined

cinnamon123 said:

Sounds like a fabulous night out! Yay for good friends and people who just get us! 

Exactly this!! 

Glad you had a good night out, and still going with the good deeds, bless your heart x

abaka

Sounds like just the type of night out you need every once in a while!  Glad you had fun and hope the damage on the bank balance wasn’t as bad as the hangover made you think!!!!

I had my first night out for drinks since my LBM and I was very impressed I stayed within my set budget for the night although I was living in fear when the group I was with insisted on doing rounds.  15 quid for a round of 2 drinks!!! I remember when a round of drinks for 5-6 would be about £20 

AntoMac

You can’t put a price on a great night out Keedie. We all need a bit of enjoyment and to let ourselves go every now and then.
I was at a 30th party last night, and was pleased with myself for staying up till midnight…… Well your 4.30am has put that into perspective! That wasn’t too far off the time I got up this morning!!!  More impressed by your continued will to look out for those less fortunate than yourself.  It’s a value I try to apply in my own life. I always try to do what my Dad would do if he was still with us.  Here’s hoping the financial damage of your night out wasn’t too damaging when you tot it up.
As for £15 for 2 drinks @abaka , you must drink in some posh establishments 
£7.80 for 2 pints of Amstel where I was last night, which was most acceptable.

Keedie

I'm not so dehydrated now and so I'm recovered from my night out more or less aside from the limping around 😂.

My friend is like another sister, as we just click and we met when we went travelling 20 years ago, and there'a trio of us (she is one of the friends I met up with last weekend in Norfolk. So yes @cinnamon123, yay to good friends 😁. My son asked where his McD's was when he saw the packaging that I couldn't be bothered to put in the bin when we got home, and I told him that the man in McD's ate it and he was laughing at me always feeding random people @LittleMissDetermined, but said that it was a good thing to do. Hopefully, my son will always be willing to help those in need, he has his good qualities but he's in the midst of teenage angst and the self-centred approach that goes with it. But he has a little more time to grow more compassionate.

The damage wasn't too bad @abaka, as I realised that a lot of my drunkenness was due to the fact that I inhaled my glass of wine before we left as we were running late, and then I had an alcopop cocktail en route. Then I had 3 double malibu and cokes so things got a bit blurry lol. But one round for 2 was £21! And one double malibu and coke was £10. The saddest thing is that because it was bar/restaurant/club I wasn't surprised by the price, but I was relieved that we were in Zone 2 as if we'd gone somewhere else or in central London, £10 wouldn't cover the double Malibu no chaser! So I do envy your prices @AntoMac, London is a scam of all scams in terms of the cost of things. Glad you had a good night out, and midnight is not to be sniffed at, you did well as my night out was an abberration 😂. My night out was £54.30 including food, and although it was a lot, it was a great night.

I've got another birthday celebration Sat 14th Oct, so I'll have to rework the budget again as I forgot that was a thing 🤦🏾‍♀️. I've got my son's birthday on Friday and mine on Saturday and a family dinner on Sunday, so it's all a bit spend happy this month. So I've tried to get back into NSD, as I realised that spending money on food out of laziness or convenience was just making my life harder. So I've not spent anything for the last 2 days as the rest of the week is very expensive with our joint birthdays. I've also joined the October grocery challenge, and I've got a leftover free school meals shopping voucher for Aldi, so I will use that this month to help keep the shopping costs down.

I paid £72.67 to Creation for our mattresses and my fancy pillows, and that's now just over 20% repaid and tidied my account balance and sent £0.65 to the PAD pot. I'll do some more head scratching and sums tomorrow, as I'm running out of steam and I've prattled on long enough lol.

Keedie

I've not done a proper financial review in the longest time, so I am aiming to do one at the end of the month to review how things have gone (Spending Summary) and then one on the first of the month for my goals/intentions (Future Focus). I've been keenly watching everyone else's summaries and I've pinched some of @Squirrelz92's format as it was so clear and focussed. So it's a little late due to my drunkeness and recovery at the weekend 😂, but better late than never.

September 2022 Spending Summary

Starting Balance = £19,508.16 | Amount Repaid = £545.96 (2.46%) | Closing Balance = £18,962.20
Total Repaid to Date = £3,220.34 (14.52%)

In September I focussed on getting a better debt/life balance, and so I paid less of my debts off and actually had a weekly allowance and made a proper start on my sinking funds and the plan on how to manage all of that. I'm proud to be back under the £19,000 mark, and although I'm still £1,326.23 higher than my initial debt restart tracking balance of £17,635.97, I'm ironically more proud of what I have achieved in the last couple of months even though I am in more debt. As I feel like my mindset is definitely changing.

Bank of Mum 2 (family holiday)
Starting Balance = £300 | Amount Repaid = £0 (0% repaid) | Closing Balance = £300 | Total Repaid to Date = £0 (0% repaid)
I am not making any payments on this until I am in a better position with the exam fees fund, as my mum is not in a rush for this and so this will be tackled in November 2022

Bank of Mum 3 (school fees)
Starting Balance = £4,800 | Amount Repaid = £50 (1.04% repaid) | Closing Balance = £4,750 | Total Repaid to Date= £50 (1.04% repaid)
Although the initial payment is not a lot compared to what I owe, I can breathe a little easier now that I am making consistent payments and the debt is starting to come down. My mum doesn't seem to be at all fussed about when it is fully repaid, so I will continue with small monthly payments to chip away at what I owe, whilst hammering the other debts and snowballing. Once I have everything cleared, I will then tackle this debt. I was happy that I had the courage to speak to my mum and ask if I could repay it at a more comfortable pace and she said that she wondered why I was trying to kill myself paying it off so quickly, when it is her long term savings and she is fine as long as it is repaid. I really hope to be in the financial position when my son is older, that if he needs me in a crisis, I am able to be there for him in the same way that my mum was for me.

Barclaycard
Starting Balance = £9,495 | Amount Repaid = £340.42 (3.59% repaid) | Closing Balance = £9,154.58 | Total Repaid to Date = £433.22 (4.52% repaid)
The direct debit for September 2022 was £284.85 and so this made up the bulk of my payment, plus an overpayment of £55.57 allowed me to get the remaining balance to a point where the 3% minimum payment was just under £275 a month at £274.64. So I have fixed the direct debit at £275 so that I am always paying above the minimum payment to improve my credit rating and get the balance down quicker. I'm hoping that as the minimum payment to monthly payment gap widens, this will make my account management more favourable and I'll be eligible for better deals, as Barclaycard does better money transfer rates and balance duration than MBNA. The 15 months of payment at £275 a month from October 2022 to December 2023 is £4,125 and that will lead to a balance at December 2023 of £5,304.58 although I need to get rid of that £4.58 as I like a tidy balance when possible 😁. If my need for round numbers does not win out, then by December 2023, I will have £972.38 outstanding from the 0% interest balance transfer that ends on 1 February 2024. So I am hoping to have been in a position to snowball some of the other debts and through surveys, to clear this by that due date. 

Creation
Starting Balance = £990 | Amount Repaid = £72.67 (7.34% repaid) | Closing Balance = £917.33 | Total Repaid to Date = £145.34 (13.68% repaid)
This is one creditor that I don't care to have a tidy balance for, as the payments are fixed ay 0% interest for the duration of the credit agreement. Also, since buying these fancy pillows and my new mattress I sleep so much better that I really don't care about this debt (as in no guilt at spending). I will not be paying this off early and it will run its course to October 2023.

MBNA
Starting Balance = £2,950 | Amount Repaid = £50 (1.69% repaid) | Closing Balance = £2,900 | Total Repaid to Date = £100 (3.33% repaid)
This will be my priority debt moving forward, and the minimum payment is set currently at £29 but I have a fixed direct debit of £50. The 0% balance transfer ends on 15 August 2023, so I will throw everything that I have at this debt. My PAD pot will enable me to make overpayments, plus whatever I receive as repayments from my siblings for the money that they owe me. Once this is repaid, I will snowball the equivalent of this direct debit as a standing order to my Barclaycard.

Sky Mobile
Starting Balance = £973.26 | Amount Repaid = £32.87 (3.38% repaid) | Closing Balance = £940.29 | Total Repaid to Date = £65.74 (6.53% repaid)
The payment for this is part of my phone bill, so I don't let this one bother me. I could have waited for our phones, but it was hypomanic bipolar splurge and I just have to live with it. So it goes.

Debt Reflection

I'm proud of having more of a debt/life balance in September 2022 than I did in recent months, as that pressure was too much and I was so stressed all the time! My hair has still thinned and I don't eat a lot or sleep a lot, but I do feel better. I think having a 'light' payment month after I have cleared another creditor will really help me to stay motivated. In those months, I will still snowball and make overpayments, but not to the same degree. Just so that I have more disposable income for a fleeting moment, or have a treat or I can bank more in my emergency fund.

As having September where I was a little kinder to myself, and did things like having an allowance and seeing my friends etc really helped me mentally. The strain of being in so much debt, and feel really depressed and disheartened by everything that happened with my son, the extra debt I had to borrow and the stress of trying to fix the car and moving all the money around for the balance transfers in August 2022 just drained me.

But knowing that my balance on 1 August 2022 was £22,182.54 and by the 30 September 2022 it was £18,962.20, makes me feel like I can do this. Paying off 14.52% of my balance in 2 months is not to be sniffed at either, although this progress rate will slow down considerably as August 2022 had a lot of large payments. I'm feeling cautiously optimistic for the future...

Squirrelz92

Hi @Keedie First off, loving the summary 😆 It helps so much when it is set out a certain way doesn't it? I find it helps motivate me more as it makes my financial position and my progress clear as day moving into the next period. 

Absolutely insane achievement knowing you paid 14.52% of your debt off in two months!!!! Ruddy awesome!!! It is definitely not to be sniffed at as I would kill to be able to do what you have so go you 🎉

I think your idea of having a small break after paying off one CC by not overpaying as much the next period is a great idea. Not only is it incentive but its also a mental reward for yourself for continuing to chip away despite all the giant potholes we incur along the way

Keep it up! You are rocking it 😆🎊 x

IndiJonesi

Well done @keedie on reaching a better work/life balance and that is a huge amount that you have paid off so far.  I take glucosamine for my aching bones/joints and it has also made my thinning hair a bit thicker.  Indi 

Keedie

Bless you @Squirrelz92, I absolutely love your enthusiasm! And yes, this is the perfect way to do a summary as I know that I am focussing on one month at a time, and I will be able to have a mini celebration each month on what I have achieved and have a laser sharp focus on what I can achieve in the next period. 

I'll clear the Bank of Mum 2 in November and so December means that I can relax a little and enjoy the festive period before going at it hard again in January. 

Thanks @IndiJonesi, having this balance feels a lot better, and I'm not so weighed down. I will look into glucosamine, as the pain gets to be too much at times and the bonus of having thicker hair will really be appreciated. My hair has thinned all along my hairline and at the nap of neck and parts in the middle. Luckily it's an afro so it's not so noticeable to the untrained eye, but it's not normal for me to have clumps of hair coming out when I comb it or touch it.

beanielou

Well done. 

Be proud. Xx