The Mental Debt Struggle...

Keedie

Thanks @Debsnewbudget that's really kind of you to say. That's a good idea about the college, I will contact them and ask if they accept private candidates for exams 👍🏾. Hopefully they do, or I can book with another exam centre in the area so that the journey is familiar to him, as his anxiety will derail his exam efforts if there's too much unfamiliarity.

Keedie

Thanks @LittleMissDetermined, I feel less anxious about the Barclaycard knowing that it will be reducing at a steady pace. From October 2022 to December 2023 is 15 months of payments at £275, and that's £4,125 wiped off that card! Knowing that I'm able to bring that one down will free up my finances and mindset to just tackle the MBNA card without worrying that by the time I've cleared that one, I've still got a really massive debt with Barclaycard. It's amazing how moving things around a little makes all the difference.

Squirrelz92

HI @Keedie, just caught up with your diary

Your plan for the next few months sounds solid indeed! Fingers crossed you receive the loan amounts back from your family members soon so you can act upon your plans!

The MBNA reduction by Dec 2023 sounds like a dream! What an achievement that will be! x

Keedie

Hey @Squirrelz92, thanks for reading. I thought my plan was solid, but I do slightly regret the overpayment to Barclaycard as I didn't realise that I needed to spend £19 on my son's science books and £12.50 on the maths books for the college. And we needed a few bits and pieces from Lidl, so I took £50 from the energy fund and will replace that over the coming months. Live and learn I guess lol.

But it wasn't all bad, as when I came out of Lidl a homeless guy was standing by my car and asked me for some money so that he could buy some chips as he's hungry. I had no cash at all, so I just walked with him a few shops further down and brought him fish and chips and a drink for £7.99 and he was so excited to eat, but then I felt bad when I got home as I forgot to see if wanted any sauce 🤦🏾‍♀️ which you have to pay for, and I hate dry chips 😬. If I didn't transfer the money I would have automatically said I didn't have anything, but I was feeling a little flushed lol and at least he got to eat a warm meal.

By December 2023, I would have only 3/8 creditors left, as I would have paid off the family holiday to mum, cleared MBNA entirely and finished paying for the mattress. I will also have nearly halved both Barclaycard and Sky Mobile. The debt to my mum for the school fees will only have gone down a little bit (by £750), but that one will be the last to clear as we've agreed that I will focus on the others whilst still repaying her, then when I get into a better position with my debts, I blitz the remaining amount to her.

My plan for my debt free journey and my finances has a yearly focus, so that I can only concentrate on one thing at a time so that I hopefully reduce the overwhelming feeling:

• 2022 - paying exam fees, £600 energy fund, establishing various sinking funds including Christmas 2022, emergency fund and clearing family holiday (Bank of Mum 2)
• 2023 - maintaining sinking funds, paying MBNA in full, paying Creation in full
• 2024 - maintaining sinking funds, paying Barclaycard in full, paying Sky Mobile in full
• 2025 - maintaining sinking funds, paying the remainder to my mum for the school fees (Bank of Mum 3) and saving

Hopefully my siblings do pay up on time, but I've calculated my repayment plan as if I don't receive anything from anyone. If they do, then I can comfortably clear MBNA before the interest kicks in, if they don't then I can still do it, but it will be more of a struggle. So here's hoping that they make my life easier...

LittleMissDetermined

@Keedie you have such a good heart! I hardly ever have cash on me either but will gladly buy food for those less fortunate, and donate to food banks. 
It's a shame you've had to borrow from the energy pot to pay for the school stuff, maybe that's a consideration for a future pot/sinking fund? 

Fingers crossed your siblings do pay up on time and you can comfortably clear the MBNA card 
LMD x

Keedie

It makes all a difference to someone when you can help them to positively experience such a basic requirement such as food and being able to eat, doesn't it @LittleMissDetermined? I need to do a cupboard clear out and donate quite a few tins to the food bank, and toiletries etc. I've been decluttering and realised that for some reason I have been hoarding things like toothpaste and shower gel! I must have seen a deal or not remembered where I put things because we don't need that much.

You're right that I do need a pot for school things. Especially as he will be in college next September if all goes well with his GCSEs and although there are bursaries now for the teens themselves, he'll be moving onto a 16-17 oyster card and things like travel and meals will need to be considered, as well as books and resources. I also need to think about whether or not he goes to a sixth form in a school as they're required to wear smart business dress, which means blazers, trousers, shirts etc and I'd need a variety so that he can mix and match.

He's really enjoying the hybrid learning as I think we've hit a balance of things now, and he's thanked me numerous times for giving him this opportunity and he said that he's really happy going into the college. I reminded him that he still needs to work really hard on the other 3 GCSEs online and we can have a flexible approach to what he needs to do, and how he juggles it, but the key is hard work. I keep dangling the carrot of our holiday to Turkey in July 2023, and reminding him that when he's on our all inclusive trip chilling in those donut rings at the water park, he needs to know that he has no regrets about how hard he has worked, so that he is genuinely relaxed. We're going to do a vision board so that he has his goals to focus on in a visual format. Hopefully that will keep him motivated whilst things are getting tough.

One of my sisters is going to start paying me £25 a month from November, and she has the least to repay (£258.75) and this will be cleared by September 2023 and will help with the MBNA card so that's really good. As what she owes is nearly 10% of my balance, so that will be helpful  .

abaka

Your plan sounds great Keedie!!!!  I think I’m going to be all alone here as all my fellow debt free diarists will be enjoying debt free lives and I’ll still be chugging away here!!!!

That’s such a lovely gesture with the helping out.  I’m sure karma will give you a reward for that!!

I’m also delighted to hear that things are going well with your son.  I know you started your diary around the same time as me!!! You should look back and compare how things seem compared to when you started!!!

Keedie

Oh it was a dire and incredibly stressful time when I started my diary @abaka! I'm too scared to look back just yet, but I can see the difference and feel better about things as I see my son getting more settled. He's very focused at the moment, still some typical teenage attitude, but he seems a lot happier with the hybrid way of life and learning. I'm learning to step back a bit and not be so anxious about it all as well, and having him out of the house for a few hours Monday to Thursday has also improved my mental health and mood.

You've come on leaps and bounds with your diary and progress too Abaka, and don't worry, you won't be alone! I'll be here and using my diary to chart savings and getting into a position where I maintain not being in debt. A lot of my plans are contingent on me staying mentally well and being able to continue working. If I have a bad bipolar episode or go through another period of not being able to work, then I will have to readjust things, so hopefully I can stay on a fairly even keel and reach my goals  .

abaka

Fingers crossed….but I’ll be glad if the company either way!!!!!

LittleMissDetermined

I will also still be here @abaka - focussing on the mortgage and my pension pot
LMD