The Mental Debt Struggle...

Baileys_Babe

Wishing you a very happy birthday 🎂 

beanielou

Happy birthday to you 🥳 & to your DS. 

Cherryfudge

Happy birthday @Keedie! And belated happy birthday to your son, I'm happy to hear he's doing so well.

Makingabobor2

Hope you and your son had enjoyable birthdays. Glad his surgery went well. X

AntoMac

Sorry, missed that it was your birthday yesterday. Happy birthday to you and your boy 

Humdinger1

Happy birthday @Keedie! I can see a joyful 2026 for you, starting now. Hope your son continues his quick recovery.   Love Humdinger x

Sun_Addict

Happy belated birthday to you and DS 🎂

Keedie

Oh I'm so touched by all the birthday wishes for me and my son, I really do appreciate them all, thank you so much. We both had good birthdays despite his surgery and recovery. I'll pass on your birthday wishes to him as well, thank you 🤗.

I went back to work today (from home), and I was so overwhelmed by everything. I feel like I'm really not doing much at all and it's rather disheartening. I'm not used to feeling so out of my depth at work, mainly because I was in HR for close to two decades, and it was all a bit same old, same old. But this job is lots of new things, and I must admit, I'm often incredibly confused by everything. I feel like I'm never quite sure what I should be doing and I often figure it out after I have done something wrong, because I either didn't know I was meant to do something or wasn't meant to do something as no one told me, or I can't remember the context for what I am doing, or how to execute the task. Eurgh! 

Anyways, the silver lining is that I have a plan for my finances should the agency contract continue until it's original end date of 12 December 2025. Although I sometimes wonder why I'm still there, I'll make the most of it financially whilst I am. I'm only doing two days this week, due to my son's surgery and not wanting to work on either of our birthdays. So next week's pay will be less, I should still earn enough to meet my November 2025 budget targets. Also, I calculated that I will still accrue enough annual leave, as I want to take the week off from 17 November to 19 November 2025. That's the week of the bookkeeping summit, so if I get a ticket I'll be able to go. In the event that I can't get a ticket, then I will take a break from working and study instead. 

I've spent the majority of this evening at my desk figuring out my savings goals and plan of action for the last quarter of 2025, and I think I've finally got it. I've reinstated an approach to my savings, whereby I split the goal into 1/5th, so that it becomes more manageable and achievable. That took a lot of pressure off me. And then I sat and figured out what I want each savings goal to start at as we enter into 2026, and that then made it even easier to figure out where I go from here.  I've outlined it below:

Bronze = 20% of goal
Silver = 40% of goal
Gold = 60% of goal
Platinum = 80% of goal
Diamond = 100% of goal

All Goals are by 31 December 2025

• The Main Attraction (big savings goals)

The Big Bufferoo (mini emergency fund) = £1,000 Goal || Diamond Target = £1,000
Attracting Abundance (income buffer) = £2,000 Goal || Diamond Target = £2,000
Financial Freedom (One month ahead) = £2,150 Goal || Gold Target = 1,290

• Standing on Business (essential sinking funds)

KeeMari (home & lifestyle expenses for me & my son) = £750 Goal || Silver Target = £300
The Gift (Christmas, birthdays, Eid etc) = £500 Goal || Silver Target = £200
Cruise Control (car maintenance, MOT & service etc) = £1,000 Goal || Silver Target = £400
Bills Parachute (annual expenses) = £900 Goal || Platinum Target = £720
Globetrotter (holidays & UK getaways) = £1,000 Goal || Gold Target = £600

• Side Quests (ad hoc sinking funds)

Bufferoo (home made overdraft) = £250 Goal || Diamond Target = £250
Carpe Diem (bipolar spending buffer) = £250 Goal || Gold Target = £150
The Big Shop (bulk food & household shop) = £150 Goal || Gold Target = £90
Munch Munch (family & special celebration dining out) = £150 Goal || Bronze Target = £30
The AWE List (Adaptations, Wellbeing & Equipment to manage my disabilities) = £300 Goal || Gold Target = £180

On Sunday, I'll catch up with where I am at, and I will do a Sunday Summary. The total in savings across all categories would be £7,210 by 31 December 2025, but I think I have just under half saved. I need to go through everything properly, and figure out how I can meet my savings goals. I think, though not entirely sure, that by putting a bit into sinking funds and some into savings challenges, I might be able to achieve the majority if not all of the goals. I will keep plodding along with the savings challenges, and see how much I have accumulated in the last week overall, to see if I'm setting myself an unrealistic set of goals, or if it is a big enough stretch to motivate me without overwhelming me... 🤷🏾‍♀️.

Cherryfudge

I'm just popping my head round the door to see how you are. Can I get you a cuppa or something? 

Keedie

I'm okay thanks @Cherryfudge. Life has been life-ing. So things have been overwhelming. But I'm trying to get on top of things.

They started the works on the wet room, and the bath and the bathroom tiles have been removed yesterday and the electrician came today and did some wiring stuff. They've left the sink and toilet, and the plumbers are back on Monday. But I was a bit confused as the works order said that they're not painting the toilet, just replacing the toilet and putting the new lino down. I don't know why they said they would paint the bathroom and toilet and now it's been excluded, so I need to speak to the surveyor at the council to see what is happening. 

My shoulder has been really hurting and I had physio on Wednesday. I've asked to be referred back to rheumatology or to have a scan of my shoulder, and she said that they were due to have a multidisciplinary meeting yesterday and she will call me afterwards. The physio lady said she'd contact me yesterday about steroid injections and the requested referrals, but I didn't hear from her. So I might have to contact them on Monday to see if there is an update. 

I also was incredibly brave today and called the employer insurance company today and explained that I want to terminate my carer's contract as I've not seen her since early July 2025 and not heard from her since the end of August 2025. The guy on the phone was really helpful and outraged on my behalf. He's going to send me a letter template that I need to write to her to make contact, and then if I hear nothing, contact her again. So I feel better that things are moving forward, and I need to contact the disability service for their support to recruit a new PA. I held off on getting someone new as I was a bit mistrustful of anyone else coming into my home and being vulnerable. But I'm mentally ready to accept help again. 

Budget wise, I've created a spreadsheet to help me track my savings and reduced some of my savings goals. So I'm being kinder to myself and trying not to be too ambitious. My agency contract might get extended for a month or so, and that would help with the budget. I feel more comfortable now, like I'm not financially stretching myself too thin. And hopefully that will put me in a stronger position to start 2026.