The Mental Debt Struggle...

Keedie

I dunno if that's an option @beanielou, but I'll be sure to ask. If you don't ask, you don't get. An accent wall of tiles sounds really cool. I also need to check with them about painting the radiator in the toilet as it's very rusty. And I don't know how to treat it before painting it and I don't want to have a nice bathroom and toilet and still have a manky radiator. So I need to see what to do about that, in a way that won't mess up their schedule. I figured between them painting the walls, but before the toilet and flooring is put in. As there's no point painting it beforehand unless there's something suitable to cover it with,

I had a good time at my bipolar group this evening. And I have decided to train to become a group facilitator. Eek! I'm nervous but excited. I'll be sharing the responsibility with two other friends. The previous long standing facilitator stepped down last month. So it's nice to know that amongst the three of us, we can keep things going.

I've got my little nephews for Boy's Night today, so I've got to get shopping and tidy up so that the little ones can use my room. I'll be on the sofa tonight after they have their movie night. They're so so excited about their sleepover. It's actually quite humbling and touching so see how much they want to hang out with their Aunty Keeda 💖. I need to make sure that I remember their popcorn orders so that I can put together a little snack box for them whilst they watch the films. Hopefully there isn't big arguments about what they'll be watching and it doesn't take too long to choose something that they all want to see.

Baileys_Babe

Could you make choosing a film quicker by giving them a choice of 2 or 3 films? I think otherwise there is so much to choose from how do they narrow it down.

beanielou

I think it's your bathroom and you should ask for what you want.  When I got mine done I arranged to have a new radiator that I paid for & they just that put the new one up instead of the old one at no cost.

Cherryfudge

All of a sudden your new bathroom is so close! Absolutely get the radiator done at the same time - how about putting a bit of your £550 towards it? We got a heated towel rial in ours instead of a radiator and it's very useful, thought admittedly it's a dust gatherer!  And I think Beanie may be onto something with the idea of an accent wall. That could look really good.

I love the way your budget is so fluid and you keep remaking it as income and circumstances change. I wish I could be so organised, but I think it takes the right sort of brain. However, that dynamic involvement seems to me the optimum way to make a budget work for you.

I hope your training to be a group facilitator is as interesting as it sounds. If you are sharing it with friends hopefully you will be able to contribute without taxing your energies too much.

And I'm glad you son has a date for his op - though the timing could be better. Perhaps, with that and the wet room being done, you could have your birthdays early or later in the month? We just had our anniversary early because the actual day is likely to be full of business-type things.

Keedie

Boy's Night was a great success that left me absolutely knackered! They had such a great time. We avoided movie night drama @Baileys_Babe as the youngest one wanted to watch Elio on Prime Video but I told him I wasn't paying £15.99 to rent it (not very MSE for me), and so the oldest one suggested that they watch The Truman Show. And so they all agreed, had their snack bowls and apple juice and had a lovely munch on popcorn and their sweets and watched the film. I even heard them discussing bits of the film today, so it clearly made an impression. I've never even seen it, so I'm clearly missing out 🤣.

I'll definitely ask about a featured wall of tiles @beanielou and I'll ask about the radiator fitting @Cherryfudge. The one in the toilet is very rusty all at the bottom and the paint just keeps peeling off, so it definitely needs changing. Years ago they said that they were changing the radiators in the block and nothing happened, so I'll contact the council surveyor to see what he says about. The one in the bathroom leaks sometimes and it's stained the vinyl beneath it and it leaks brown stuff down the side of the radiator so I think that needs changing too. But it's not in the same sorry state as the toilet one. If both are able to be replaced, then a heated towel rail is what I'd want in the bathroom and will speak to the contractor about fitting my own one if the radiators are approved to be replaced and see what he says. If they are able to fit my own radiator, then I will take it from one of my savings pots, and will move the money around, as the £550 has already been allocated. 

The facilitator role will be shared with two other people, so I won't need to always be 'on' for it. But I will definitely be aiming to protect my peace and maintain my ongoing recovery, but not investing too much of myself into it. I think being able to share it with friends will make all the difference, as we all want to see the group continue to thrive.

This morning, I introduced my nephews to cash stuffing and they were more than happy to help me redistribute the £550! I split it into two parts, with £250 going into Globetrotter Asia and the rest across my sinking funds and side quests. I have tracker that comes with a 12 sided coloured dice that allows me to choose a savings goal for each of the 12 slots, and then roll the dice and tally up what is allocated and then put the money into the relevant fund. So we did a mini game day for Globetrotter Asia and it was split across flights, visas, day trips, spending money, gifts etc. That starts off that binder of savings. Once I've got a better handle on average costings for each category, I can work it out properly. And I can then prioritise which two or three subcategories get put on the fund allocation list alongside flights. As today, I have 6/12 categories as flights, then the remaining 6 categories were all listed once. 

We then did a savings challenge that will be a really long slow burn and that got £90. When it's completed, it will be reallocated into the relevant Main Attraction savings goal that I have at that time. The remaining £210 was split across my sinking funds. It was a fun way to put the money aside and because it was a game day, the kids really enjoyed it and were fascinated about the magic of savings and budgeting (as I taught them my budget first).

Keedie

THE (BELATED) SUNDAY SUMMARY
(Week 36 ~ 7 September 2025)

I have categorised my savings, some of which are to be offset against impending debts or to prevent a debt from occurring. 

The Main Attraction (snowballed major savings)

The focussed savings goal gets £10 a week, plus the lion's share of the reallocated money from bonus money or savings challenges.

Globetrotter Asia (£2,500) due by 28 February 2026
Progress Checker = £255/£2,500 (10.2% saved)
This is for my big trip to the Philippines to see my brother and his new wife. He said that flights from there to Japan are a lot cheaper, so depending on overall costs, Japan may be back on the itinerary. I'm glad this big savings goal has been started, and by breaking it into categories such as flights, gifts, spending money, accommodation, airport spends and so forth, it will make it much easier to manage. Having lots of mini milestones and goals within a larger goal, will make all the difference, as it's less stressful and daunting.

New Wheels (£4,500) ⛔️ ON HOLD ⛔️
Progress Checker = £0/£4,500 (0% saved)
I will need to get a new car at some point in 2026. I detest driving manual and need to switch to automatic and my car is slowly deteriorating. But I will wait to see what happens with my PIP renewal. If I qualify for the enhanced mobility element, then I will consider a motability vehicle. But either way, this can't start until Globetrotter Asia is either fully funded or about 75% funded.

Career Change (£3,250) ⛔️ ON HOLD ⛔️
Progress Checker = £0/£3,250 (0% saved)
This is a debt offset goal, as my savings will need to repay my mum for fronting the bookkeeping course so that I can change careers. I will need to start it as a background main challenge at some point in the coming months, so that the amount I need to borrow is reduced. I will be saving up lump sums of £250 and then making repayments that way. But if I can get a head start on the savings, then I will need to borrow less.

Financial Freedom (£2,500) due by 31 December 2026
Progress Checker = £1,219.36/£2,500 (48.77% saved)
This is my One Month Emergency Income Fund. This is the equivalent to my bills, expenses, spending and savings that I budget for monthly. So once complete, I know that if my income ceased, I have one month covered as an emergency. Once the goal is achieved, the overall target will increase to reflect two months and so on. It is held in my Natwest Digital Saver, and I have reduced the monthly payment from £150 a month to £50 on a standing order. As I complete savings challenges, I will reallocate some money to this to keep it accumulating quicker. When the Help to Save account matures in February 2027, it will go in here as well.

Standing on Business (essential sinking funds)

These funds are ongoing, and are allocated £5 a week but this is flexible in case another fund is more pressing, a fund can be skipped. Or if one fund has reached its goal, then the money is snowballed into another fund. 

KeeMari (£750) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £35/£750 (4.67% saved)
This fund is for anything me, my son or our home needs. This ranges from prescriptions, home furnishings, self care, hair care etc. 

The Gift (£500) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £205/£500 (41% saved)
This covers Christmas, Birthdays, Eid, Mothers Day and any other event requiring a gift/contribution like weddings, funerals, Christenings or one off charity events. My son's birthday is coming up in a few weeks, and two nephews, so this fund is doing okay. But it will need more attention to cover Christmas.

Cruise Control (£750) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £75/£750 (10% saved)
This covers MOT & service, car maintenance and car tax. I pay car insurance monthly, and until the Main Attraction goals are not so heavy, then I can increase this fund's goal and start to save for car insurance. 

Bills Parachute (£1,500) ~ due by 31 December 2025
Progress Checker = £920/£1,500 (61.33% saved)
This pays for annual bills and subscriptions and will be lump sum payment to cover utilities when they increase in April 2026, to offset against some of the increase to enable the bills part of my budget to remain fairly consistent. This is funded by the 50 Envelope Challenge (£875/£1,275 = 68.63%) and a separate Bills Parachute top up fund (£45/£225 = 20%).

Globetrotter (£750) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £0/£750 (0% saved)
Once my main travel focus for Globetrotter Asia is covered, I can then start paying into this to pay for cheap package holidays. As The Main Attraction at the moment is travel related, I will allocate the £5 for this fund to Globetrotter Asia to push it along. So this will remain at 0% whilst I accelerate the main travel fund.

Side Quests (ad hoc funds)

These are non-essential but realistically take the sting out of life by being prepared for lifestyle requirements, whilst acknowledging that once they are fully funded they will sit in the background until needed.

Bufferoo (£250) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £40/£250 (16% saved)
My homemade digital overdraft as my expenses are predominantly cash, but not some places are cashless. Any money spent from this fund instead of cash will be put back. It will also act as a miscellaneous contingency fund in case there is an overspend or unexpected expense in another category.

Carpe Diem (£250) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £30/£250 (12% saved)
The Bipolar Buffer for when I have a hypomanic or major depressive episode, both of which can lead to uncontrollable and impulsive spending (but more so hypomania). I know despite battling daily to remain as balanced as possible, it's an ongoing recovery journey. Therefore having money set aside for when the inevitable happens, means that my budget and finances are not completely derailed. Also, I've got less guilt and 'cleaning up' to do when I'm at my most vulnerable, post episode.

The Big Shop (£150) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £10/£150 (6.67% saved)
This is funded by a savings challenge from my weekly food shop, and it will be either £5 or £10 a week depending on what the dice decides. This will cover bulk shops for things like toiletries, cleaning supplies and household staples like rice, tinned food, a large freezer restock etc. It can also be used to boost a Christmas food shop. The aim is to only use this when it has been fully funded, and then to start again. 

Munch Munch (£150) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £100/£150 (66.67% saved)
My family eats out for family celebrations like birthdays on a regular basis (we're a large family as there was 14 of us in Nando's for my eldest sister's birthday and some of us were missing). This allows me to participate if the fund allows it. If it's a spur of the moment thing, then that is covered by the KeeMari fund. The next birthday meal would be me and my son's, but due to his operation, this may not get used much outside of take away. We'll just see.

The AWE List (£300) ~ ongoing until fully funded
Progress Checker = £200/£300 (66.67% saved)
This is for Adaptations, Wellbeing & Equipment that makes managing my chronic conditions more manageable and gives me a better quality of life. I've been setting aside a bit of PIP over the last few months and this has allowed me to build this fund to what it is. I need some kind of hip/back support as I feel like my hips are a bit loose and my back aches when I walk or stand for awhile. I also need another lymphathic drainage massage, so those will be the things that I do/spend on in the coming weeks.

honeybee1234

I'm always impressed by your finesse in your budget and tracking your targets @Keedie, it's inspired me to look at doing the same! It's so well thought out, I like how you cover all the eventualities so well! 

Cherryfudge

Some of those savings pots are looking very healthy! I like the way you balance out the weekly food budget and bulk buys.

The budget games day with the boys is ingenious: I hope they are all raring to go and start their own savings now that they've seen how it can be done. One of my sons used to do virtual shares which led to real shares when he was old enough.