Debt and Caring

WelshmansDaughter

I probably will challenge the decision but I'll wait until I have all my paperwork, the official assessment won't be completed until the 11th. 
Been all over the place both spatially and emotionally today. Poor little autistic self thought we were going for our usual coast walk when we left the house today and got all excited. I had planned to do something else and had to disappoint myself. I nearly cried. 
Took myself on a little holiday day, drove out to a forest walk and then out for lunch. Library books then drive home. So tired I decided to stop in a lidl car park on the way home. Had the car until 10pm so had a wee rest at home then out to the supermarket. 
Expensive day. Not sure it was worth it but at least I tried.
The good news is I've been offered the relief job assuming all my paperwork passes muster. To start sometime after Christmas. 
Going to soothe my achy muscles in a bath before hopefully getting some sleep. 

Cherryfudge

That disappointment is a big hurdle but you will get past it - well done for getting the relief job especially, and for getting yourself out and about. They are both significant, so perhaps do yourself a visual of those as well as the work involved in simply being you. You put such a lot of effort in, it's great to see it rewarded.

I hope you sleep well and wake up proud of yourself for all you've got done today.

savingholmes

Definitely appeal. See the PM I sent you a while ago for details of guides you can use. I got assessed and then went for P1p - a little while later - hard to get without supporting evidence and formal diagnosis. I used to fall into the trap of believing I should save medical resources for others - it's only in recent years that I've accepted I need the help and it's my turn.

PennysIntoPounds

Congratulations on the job offer, that's brilliant! 
And great that it's after Christmas so you have some time to regroup emotionally and practically. Aw, I'm so pleased for you 😊

savingholmes

Well done on the relief job

WelshmansDaughter

Thanks all. It was a real knock to my confidence not getting jobs so I'm quite pleased I managed to actually get one.
And I actually went out and saw a human who is not related to me. Had a fun evening doing some of my old circus training (or trying to). It was kinda scary how much I'd forgotten- there was just a blank space where all the old moves used to be. But then I suppose that when I was in classes I couldn't repeat things often enough to actually learn them so I was relying on seeing people do it.
I had planned a bed day today as the 2nd assessment appointment was this morning. Good thing I did as she said the words confirming autism and I cried. I'd already planned to order lunch so I'm glad I had that and wasn't just eating a recognition meal. May have also had wine this afternoon which I had bought to celebrate the job offer. Slightly regretting it now.

PennysIntoPounds

Glad you had a cry and some wine and some planned lunch. What a lot of mixed feelings you must have. Great work on revisiting skills and interests, and allocating time to rest and time to celebrate. Onwards and upwards me dear x

Cherryfudge

It sounds like progress - hope you are okay after the wine! Don't forget you've been poorly as well, and that takes it out of you.

savingholmes

I'm pleased you have a formal diagnosis now. Use that in your appeal. I felt weird after diagnosis - but it was mostly relief and validation. I was so proud of all the challenges I'd overcome in getting to this point in my life (3 years ago) before getting final diagnosed.

WelshmansDaughter

Saved myself a walk in the rain this morning by spending 2.50 🤣🤣🤣 
Woke up unable to use time to manage my plans so just flowed instead. This meant being in town 2 hours before I needed to be at Santa's Grotto to see Small One rampage. I had a coffee and filled out forms. Took the bus and wound up there an hour early only to find family in the queue for breakfast. Tried hard not to feel like I had been excluded- I don't think they did it intentionally? They are quite bad at planning.
Planning has been on my mind this week, I got the bullet journal book from the library and didn't feel like immediately ejecting all organisation from my life and running wild for the first time in a long time. Huh, just realized that's what being dysregulated means 🤣🤷
I did have to leave the flat in a panic yesterday after friend texted me to say there would be a viewing in an hour. Of course this was after I put my only change of clothes in the wash and was walking around in a towel...
Thankfully I found a pair of trousers and the wash finished in time for me to put a damp top on, cover it with a coat and then leg it out the door. Between that and all the cleaning I haven't moved that fast in my life.