We'd like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum... Read More »
PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING: Hello Forumites! In order to help keep the Forum a useful, safe and friendly place for our users, discussions around non-MoneySaving matters are not permitted per the Forum rules. While we understand that mentioning house prices may sometimes be relevant to a user's specific MoneySaving situation, we ask that you please avoid veering into broad, general debates about the market, the economy and politics, as these can unfortunately lead to abusive or hateful behaviour. Threads that are found to have derailed into wider discussions may be removed. Users who repeatedly disregard this may have their Forum account banned. Please also avoid posting personally identifiable information, including links to your own online property listing which may reveal your address. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
help need help!!!!
Options
Comments
-
PasturesNew wrote: »What happened to the mother/baby places that unmarried mothers used to be sent to in the 70s when their families kicked them out?
They didn't get flats back then, it was off to the Unmarried Mothers Unit.
I think it might be better to bring those back. Reduce the overhead of keeping them while providing them with an environment conducive to bringing up a baby and opportunities to share/help/learn with others.
I know a woman who was in one such home here in Glasgow in the early 1970's. I'm positive she would make you think again of how 'productive' they would be going by her actual experience of such a set-up.
Or perhaps you would like to go further back in time to gain a model for today from the poor women who had their children adopted at birth then for themselves to be incarcerated in the old Asylums? Then again, Magdalene girls experiences weren't that great either.0 -
PasturesNew, I take it that you think that young girls should be forced to have their babies adopted. That system was barbaric. It harmed not only the young mothers but their children. Unplanned and semi-planned pregnancies happen. Some girls choose not to abort or do not realise they are pregnant until it is so late they have no alternative. Others (misguidedly, perhaps) think that they would like to have a baby. There is no one size fits all solution, but the one thing that is in all our interests is a solution that results in children being brought up in safe environments but mothers who aren't stressed and in dire poverty.Mortgage started on 22.5.09 : £129,600Overpayments to date: £3000June grocery challenge: 400/6000
-
Everyone agrees accidents can happen. I suppose the ones who really nark people off are the ones who actively choose - no accident, quite the contrary - to have a baby and be funded by the taxpayer for evermore, as a lifestyle choice. Let's face it, we'd all like to never have to do a day's work, be securely housed and able to enjoy spending time with our young families instead of working every hour to pay the bills. But someone has to pay for this - and it's other taxpayers. So whilst I agree the children should not have to suffer, equally nor should other taxpayers and their children have to bear the brunt of this, financially.
Personally, I don't think a return to old-style 70's moralising and stigmatizing of unmarried mothers is the way to go, but I'm not sure what is....0 -
guinness34 wrote: »but with them both being british can't see that happening :rotfl: :rotfl:
You have a lovely attitude. :rolleyes:
Is it a bit harsh to say teach the silly little cow about contraception? No such thing as 'unplanned' pregnancy. No one has to have a baby if they don't want to. If she and her family/he and his family can't support it, why the heck should everyone else have to?
No, I wouldn't want to go back to the bad old days of M&B units, but what is wrong with people paying for their own choices, or God forbid, waiting until they can afford something before they have it?0 -
Am totally disgusted with some of the replies this has got, blatantly saying you should lie to the council.
And don't even get me started on your apparently rasict comment that she won't get a house cause she's a uk citizen.
If she's in fact in a stable relationship with a man who has a good job why is there even a sugestion the council will or should house your daughter? Never mind lying to get that help.
Can't they sort themselves out with private renting etc? Your daughter isn't homeless, so if she wants to live with her man, then she needs to make that happen, words like saving and telling the truth come to mind, not lying to the council and demanding a house.
There are enough people who really do need the councils help, young girls who's parents really have thrown them out, your taking money and resources from them. If telling the truth doesn't get you what you want, maybe there's a reason for it.Don’t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it.
Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.0 -
Young Mothers DO contribute to society. They contribute people which is what makes a society. The politically correct time to have children these days is apparently in your mid 30's when you can 'afford' them like you were buying a car. Pregnancy after the mid 30's can be far more problematic requiring more of valuable taxpayers resources in NHS support. Are these Mothers financially burdening the state unnecessarily? Taxpayers DO benefit from seeing to it that children in their society aren't raised in poverty. Hopefully everyone can agree on this at least.
Whilst the Mail readers among us are foaming at the mouth in righteous indignation there's corporate fatcats stealing their savings and pensions who really contribute nothing. These are far worse IMO.
If there was a decent stock of social housing and the private housing market was not so expensive then it wouldn't seem like such an outrage. But is that the fault of Young Mothers? No, because their too young to vote! It's the fault of the voters who won't vote for decent governance because they're too self interested. So we got the system we voted for or are too apathetic to change which encourages fraud because it's a better alternative to putting the Mother in a MENTAL HEALTH INSTITUTION because she can't 'afford' a baby.
We made the bed, now we lie in it.0 -
jyonda,
No problem with someone having a baby, but why should that be an excuse to sponge off everyone else? NO ONE has to have a baby. If the parents or the parents' families can't afford it, then tough, why have one and expect everyone else to support it? The human race is not about to die out. There has been no point in my life where I could really afford to have a child, also I don't have any special urge to have one.
However I don't expect other people to support my lifestyle choices. Years ago people had many more children on a lot less (relatively speaking). They made choices and did without other things. I don't mind contributing to education & such, but why I should support someone who thinks having children is a career choice is frankly beyond me. I pay my way, let parents at least have some semblance of supporting their children before they DECIDE to have them.
And no, I'm not suggesting that a single mother is mentally deficient; bit of a leap...
And who the hell do you think constitutes a decent government these days? When I voted Labour I thought it would make things better - experience has taught me that politicians are a bunch of self serving tosspots; Catch 22, anyone who wants to be a politician isn't fit to be a politician.0 -
So we wave the magic wand and get a government that is right and proper.Pray,jyonda,what political party is that?Unless we all vote for some extremist party,where I am sitting,they all strike me as a pretty rotten bunch.I long ago resigned my Labour party membership and certainly have no intention of re joining in the forseeable future.0
-
I just personally get frustrated that these days people don't seem to get any reward for working hard and trying to fund every aspect of their live. I have people saying to me if you had a child you would cope, yes we would cope, but it would be very hard ( even with the cut backs a lot of people on here seem to think my generation aren't prepared to make) Myself and my partner don't even earn bad money but whatever you earn never seems to be enough these days especially when paying a mortgage, rent (Shared Ownership property) and bills. Other people seem to pop out kids and get housed and don't pay a penny in the way of rent, how can this happen. By the way I am not talking about teens here either I'm talking about people in or approaching mid 20's ( same age as me!) I just seem to have too much sense for my own good0
-
I also said too apathetic to change.Politicians need votes, if enough people would lobby and vote for it someone would promise it. A bit like a business but the currency is votes. You could always give the Liberals a go?
Mozette, It's a little unnerving how you describe having kids as a 'lifestyle choice'. It may seem an unnecessary luxury to you to have children but who's going to wipe the dribble from your geriatric chin? Not your grandkids that's for sure. Not minding contributing to 'education and such' is the glue which holds civilised society together and allows you to make those 'lifestyle choices' so it's not just something that benefits others.
SarahLouz: " People(You?) don't SEEM to get any reward", "Yes, but", "never SEEMS enough", "Other people SEEM". Having kids is not about what other people SEEM to have. Comparing your situation to others can only lead to jealousy, frustration, bitterness and resentment. Have kids if you want, it'll be allright, in fact it'll be great. Is it really young/ single/ unemployed Mothers who are stopping you?0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

Categories
- All Categories
- 351.2K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.2K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 453.7K Spending & Discounts
- 244.2K Work, Benefits & Business
- 599.3K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177K Life & Family
- 257.6K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.2K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards