Money Moral Dilemma: Should I charge my boyfriend rent, even though I don't have a mortgage?

JamesyMac

I’m sorry, but the fact you’ve even thought of it gives me bad vibes. If you were still paying a mortgage, then yes, but it just feels like you want to make money off him to live with you.

carooley

geordie1234 said:

Yes in theory (mates rates with written agreement)- what's the difference if you'd mortgage the place to the max and squandered the money (or invested in some assets, even). You'd expect him to contribute  then, and rightly so.

"Profit" as some peole said is not what's happening- you're currently getting no compensation for sacrificing your space

The sacrificing your space is a very valid point! 

Gycraig

YoungBlueEyes said:

neilmorgan said:

NO!
The house itself isn't costing you anything so why charge your partner? They won't like that. Just share the bills.
If he pays rent you pay tax. That tax can go into holidays and social outings instead.
If he pays rent he gets a rent book. If you split up he gets to carry on living there.

Just to play devil’s advocate - 
Through my own hard work/good fortune, and misfortune/inheritance, I am now mortgage free. Why should he live somewhere rent free having spent years pishing his wages away on cars and flash holidays, just because we’ve got together? 

He’s just about tripled my bills, why should I pay for that when I’ve deliberately made my life small and simple? 

How long would you expect him to pay “rent” on a house you own outright ?. 

5 years ? 10 years ? 20 years ? I’d rather live in a hmo than live with a partner who views me as easy money. 

By all means charge him the difference in bills, charging him “rent” on a house you own outright especially for a long period of time will just leave a sour taste in his mouth. 

Are you open to him buying into your house with you or is he just paying rent for the rest of his life ? 

MissMills81

When my now husband and I decided to move in together many moons ago, we decided that I would move into his mortgaged home which had a lot of equity and sell my small flat , I was not in a position to keep this flat to rent out plus there was little equity in the property due to the market at the time

I made sure we sat and discussed money beforehand and I proposed two options, in addition to halving the bills we could either

1, I pay half of the mortgage payment each month, and in the event of our relationship ending he would give me a portion of any equity gained for the duration I lived there,

2, I contribute nothing to the mortgage and if we went our separate ways I would leave with nothing, 

3, we both sell and buy a joint property,

Moving into his property based in the city was going to result in an increase in my monthly outgoing for bills and travel and I always tended to buy more groceries than he did anyway so I wasn't saving loads of money by moving in with him but would be a bit better off, he would be saving more money than I was by us halving the bills

Hubby sought some independent advice and then decided that option 2 suited him best, 

While OP doesn't have a mortgaged property and its not the exact situation that I had I think the key thing is that money discussions are important part of making a commitment to live together and deciding what happens in advance of a break up is a sensible thing to do,

I think it would be reasonable to ask for rent, whether the property is mortgaged or owned outright, the property will have its own maintenance costs which OP is responsible for,

If OP does decide to do this then it's also reasonable to expect that boyfriend takes a share of any equity increase as he has contributed to the maintenance and value of the home whilst living there, 

14 years later and hubby and I view the home we have as ours, we sit down at least 3 times a year to review finances and bills  😊

Groom

If he is contributing half towards all the household bills and expenses he is already saving you money. If he wasn't there you'd still be spending the same on heating for example. I wouldn't ask for rent, but perhaps suggest that he saves the money he isn't having to pay out if he lived elsewhere and puts it towards a holiday. 

Depending on how secure the relationship is, it might be worth checking how you both stand legally if it breaks up in the future, whether he would have any claim on the property if he contributes towards any modernisation and repairs etc. 

gotitsorted

Of course you charge him rent!  Why does he get the use of a house for free off the back of sacrifices you made clearing your mortgage?  Make sure you draw up an agreement to stop him trying to gouge a lump of equity in the event your relationship breaks up, because many of them do.

Note - charging rent is also a good way to sort out the decent men from the ck-lodgers, seems there are a lot of them around!  Until (if) you get married, any money discussions are business so dont be ruled by the heart and end up subsidising someone.

garethjv

It seems rather mean of him not to have offered some contribution but I don't think it right to expect him to be paying actual rent. The bigger question would be what would the arrangement have been if you even had a mortgage? Would it be right for him to be paying half or just half of the interest portion? As others have said, he's halving the cost of bills. I'd make sure house insurance is included in these bills as it's only right that this should be split evenly also but unless you were reliant on having a lodger paying rent beforehand then I don't see why rent should be expected. Whether there's a mortgage or not shouldn't really change this last point i.e. if a lodger's rent were needed to cover the mortgage.

_nate

Tell your boyfriend to dump you immediately and find someone less miserable and miserly.

CapeTown

Is he a boyfriend or a lodger  

Salybu

Be careful. I have an idea that if he pays you money for example, that you use for property repairs, or carpets etc. then you split up (particularly if things get nasty) he could claim a financial interest in the property, and that could be expensive for you.

 If you wanted to protect yourself, then I think you would need a formal arrangement with a rent book etc. in which case he basically becomes a lodger. Is that really what you want?

Possibly you would need to check this out before any rent money changed hands.

I have seen this situation many times. Though it is often a man owning property that has a girlfriend move in. I think it is unusual for rent to be charged. What often happens is that the girlfriend buys all the food, and necessities for everyday living, while the property owner pays the bills.