Bad advice for funeral plot

Raspberry_Queen

My dad died in December. He wouldn't talk about death, but believed he wanted to be buried with his parents ashes, as he had called it a family plot. It was in a chapel graveyard in Bromley. It was council owned in 1986 when he bought it, but now is privately owned. 

However, we couldn't do this because in the 1986, my parents had buried my grandparent's ashes unofficially. They were never told that this was wrong, or given any advice at all.

Due to this, the plot couldn't be used for my dad's funeral. The offer was that they could dig the grave the day before the funeral (at a cost of £8900) and hope the ashes had disappeared over time, because if they found them, the funeral legally couldn't go ahead. Obviously we couldn't do that (nor could we afford it), so my dad was buried locally. 

Can we get back any money for this failed burial plot due to the lack of advice? They were also not advised that as non-parishioners, they would have to pay 4x the cost for everything. 

I realise this is a long shot.

MattMattMattUK

Raspberry_Queen said:

My dad died in December. He wouldn't talk about death, but believed he wanted to be buried with his parents ashes, as he had called it a family plot. It was in a chapel graveyard in Bromley. It was council owned in 1986 when he bought it, but now is privately owned. 

However, we couldn't do this because in the 1986, my parents had buried my grandparent's ashes unofficially. They were never told that this was wrong, or given any advice at all.

Due to this, the plot couldn't be used for my dad's funeral. The offer was that they could dig the grave the day before the funeral (at a cost of £8900) and hope the ashes had disappeared over time, because if they found them, the funeral legally couldn't go ahead. Obviously we couldn't do that (nor could we afford it), so my dad was buried locally. 

Can we get back any money for this failed burial plot due to the lack of advice? They were also not advised that as non-parishioners, they would have to pay 4x the cost for everything. 

I realise this is a long shot.

One would imagine that the plot purchase involved a contract and some form of terms and conditions which almost certainly specify usage. I imagine the the unofficial burial of the ashes breached that, as well as potentially other issues.

I don't know if there is anything specific to burial plots, but in general very few sales involve what is legally classified as "advice", they are also not required to tell you things you should not do if those things are specified in legislation or laid out on the terms and conditions.

Flugelhorn

What did you pay out for the burial plot? 

Aylesbury_Duck

Are you asking if you can sue/claim money from the Council for the plot your father bought in 1986?  That would seem like a long shot.  You would need all the paperwork from the sale, and be able to show that your father was misled.

I noted Keep_pedalling's post.  You sound like a decent person struggling to hold together a whole load of unfortunate circumstances, many of which are your late father's doing.  I agree entirely with the advice given.  Put yourself first, it sounds like you deserve to do so.

kazwookie

What does the paper work say?

user1977

Raspberry_Queen said:

However, we couldn't do this because in the 1986, my parents had buried my grandparent's ashes unofficially. They were never told that this was wrong, or given any advice at all.

Did anybody tell them they could do it? Did they ask for advice? Didn't the plot come with a bunch of regulations attached to it (which I guess might include "don't dig it up and put stuff in without telling us")?

Robin9

I don't think you actually "buy the plot" - only the right (subject to conditions) to inter ashes/bury for a number of years.

There will be conditions re head stones / kerbs.  Additional charges re out of the council area are to be expected.

Ergates

Just to be clear:

You're asking if you could reclaim the cost for purchasing the plot back in 1986?   The plot that your parents buried your grandparents ashes in?

Clearly not.  Your parents bought a funeral plot, then used it - your grandparents remains are in it.

Sandtree

Law of limitations for breach of contract is 6 years.... you're well over the limit.

Why not just do a cremation and equally "illegally" put the ashes there?

When dealing with my father's cremation in the 90s the rules about ashes etc were all fairly strict however the crematorium was very open to turning a blind eye. Certainly what happened to the ashes in the end was "illegal" according to them but they advised on how to facilitate it. 

Raspberry_Queen

Thanks for the replies. 
My dad is already buried in late December, it only cost £300 at a local church. We are pleased with this because he definitely didn't want to be cremated, also it's more eco friendly. We had an eco funeral and it was cheap as far as these things go.

I guessed it wouldn't be possible, interesting to know about the 6 year contract. We couldn't and wouldn't illegally put the ashes there, as soon as you bury them they officially become a body. 

Raspberry_Queen

Ergates said:

Just to be clear:

You're asking if you could reclaim the cost for purchasing the plot back in 1986?   The plot that your parents buried your grandparents ashes in?

Clearly not.  Your parents bought a funeral plot, then used it - your grandparents remains are in it.

Needlessly rude. If you have nothing nice to say then don't say it. This is supposed to be a friendly forum for advice.