Curbing the ridiculous

[Deleted User]

So we had a bit of a fail yesterday but in an ok way.  We decided to go to a charity shop to get some more books for the DC.  That part was fine - about a fiver for loads of books and a puzzle.  Then we went in the adult part and they had loads of cookbooks - DH is obsessed with gardening and cooking (worse things to be obsessed with) and they were only £2 each (loads of the Jamie Oliver ones) so DH spent £20 on books!  One was a Sophie Kinsella hardback I'd fancied for a while (and that was only £1.25) and the Tana Ramsay family cookbook which I'd also wanted for a while.  But I don't feel too bad about it - we are not really eating out at the moment and know that we will be cooking so much more in the house as we will actually have a table to eat at and can invite folk round.  I mean I cannot believe we have not been able to sit at a table to eat in 16 months.  I am literally so excited about having a table.  A table. 

But, we are going to go to that shop a lot more.  To get books for us (general reading books) and for the DC.  The DC's books were in pristine condition and I even managed to get a couple of christmas ones to put away so they can have one a day to be read during December.  We honestly both spend so much on books it was almost a revelation.  Which sounds daft because obviously we knew that books in the charity shop would be cheaper but I guess we didn't realise they'd have such good books and in such decent condition.

Today we are going to garden centre to browse and so DC1 can play on the slide.  But we have some shirwama chicken for lunch we will have with left over nice bread and some yoghurt for lunch - it was on offer yesterday at £2.39 instead of £4.89 so was a good buy (yellow sticker) so we will avoid the cafe and buying a "pig sandwich" (bacon) as DC1 calls it (and their coffee is awful anyway).  Then we are losing the DC for a few hours to MIL whilst we do some packing!

astrocytic_kitten

I’m calling the charity shop books a win, sounds like it will save you loads in the future!

Buffythedebtslayer

So funny how work places are so different, in teaching they discourage use of the staff room, it is noted if you spend too much time chatting, there are people on the staff who have the ear of the leadership team, who fill them in on the friendships amongst staff, they never pay for any social things, under one regime they used to get beer and soft drinks for the end of term but everyone drove so no one drank the beer and they just kept wheeling out the same 12 or  so beers at each end of term until one person stuck a label on one beer to see if it turned up again! Which it did! 

I get we get holidays so that is a big perk. But when you are the thick of wondering who you can trust and what is the next big idea you will be found not to be conforming to it is awful. 

I am really excited about your new house, so good about the furniture and that it is all getting nearer and nearer. I was hoping to have the house sorted by the time you moved.. but am a little behind................lol

astrocytic_kitten

I’ve worked in both public and private sector - my last job had the stuff Rebecca described plus breakfast and snacks daily and weekly Friday drinks.  

I think whatever the sector it all comes down to the people, all the perks in the world can’t make up for a miserable working environment or feeling excluded and unvalued - you need to enjoy the company of colleagues to enjoy most of the perks. Emotionally disengaging sounds like the best option, though far easier said than done. Hopefully once you’re all settled and comfy in your new house it’ll be easier to brush off the work stuff too - I always think that it’s much easier to cope with troubles at work of home is great, and vice versa. When everything is awful and stressful there’s no escape.

[Deleted User]

astrocytic_kitten said:

I’ve worked in both public and private sector - my last job had the stuff Rebecca described plus breakfast and snacks daily and weekly Friday drinks.  

I think whatever the sector it all comes down to the people, all the perks in the world can’t make up for a miserable working environment or feeling excluded and unvalued - you need to enjoy the company of colleagues to enjoy most of the perks. Emotionally disengaging sounds like the best option, though far easier said than done. Hopefully once you’re all settled and comfy in your new house it’ll be easier to brush off the work stuff too - I always think that it’s much easier to cope with troubles at work of home is great, and vice versa. When everything is awful and stressful there’s no escape.

Yes, and I'm not staying purely for the perks but am hoping the team will go back to what it used to be (which is possible as the main person who is the cause of the ructions is likely to get pregnant and give up their "career", and I know that in my industry, my employer is one of the better ones to work for.

And yes, I definitely agree with you re it likely being better once we are settled in our new home.

[Deleted User]

Buffythedebtslayer said:

So funny how work places are so different, in teaching they discourage use of the staff room, it is noted if you spend too much time chatting, there are people on the staff who have the ear of the leadership team, who fill them in on the friendships amongst staff, they never pay for any social things, under one regime they used to get beer and soft drinks for the end of term but everyone drove so no one drank the beer and they just kept wheeling out the same 12 or  so beers at each end of term until one person stuck a label on one beer to see if it turned up again! Which it did! 

I get we get holidays so that is a big perk. But when you are the thick of wondering who you can trust and what is the next big idea you will be found not to be conforming to it is awful. 

I am really excited about your new house, so good about the furniture and that it is all getting nearer and nearer. I was hoping to have the house sorted by the time you moved.. but am a little behind................lol

Oh gosh buffy that sounds horrid!  Awww thank you.  I am sure you will get yourself organised - after all, "nevertheless she persisted" x

[Deleted User]

Blinking kids!!!!  So, we went to the garden centre where the slide was, DC1 was playing on it then asked for "a pig sandwich".  He persisted so we thought well let's go to the cafe and get one to share.  So we got there and he also spotted the cakes in the display cabinet.  So because he is cute, we got one bacon sarnie and 1 slice of cake for the 4 of us to share.  The bacon sarnies there are normally packed full of bacon.  £8.90 for the two things and it arrived and it had like 2 bits of bacon in - I was so cross.  Then DC1 wouldn't eat any "pig sandwich" because he wanted the cake(!)  Normally I wouldn't let him get away with it but they were both being excellent so decided I'd let him.

Then we went to park by sea and DH played with DC1 on the park and I took DC2 on a walk along the coast in his buggy as he needed a sleep - just glorious!!!!!  Then I walked with him to MIL's and met DH and DC1 there.  DH and I then came home and did some packing - we've managed all we can now really until the day we buy and the day after because there's quite a bit of stuff (kids' toys and clothes) that we can't pack until they've gone off to nursery on the Weds.  Packed what kitchen stuff we could but that's it now really.  It doesn't look tooooooo bad.

DH gone to get the DC and then it's shepherds pie from freezer for tea.  Work again tomorrow (groan) but inching every closer.

Buffythedebtslayer

astrocytic_kitten said:

I’ve worked in both public and private sector - my last job had the stuff Rebecca described plus breakfast and snacks daily and weekly Friday drinks.  

I think whatever the sector it all comes down to the people, all the perks in the world can’t make up for a miserable working environment or feeling excluded and unvalued - you need to enjoy the company of colleagues to enjoy most of the perks. Emotionally disengaging sounds like the best option, though far easier said than done. Hopefully once you’re all settled and comfy in your new house it’ll be easier to brush off the work stuff too - I always think that it’s much easier to cope with troubles at work of home is great, and vice versa. When everything is awful and stressful there’s no escape.

I think this is totally true, in my current job it has been a revolving door at the top and it has gone from one extreme to the other, however I believe I have good friends there and we help each other out so I hope we will manage, but the atmosphere is already a bit rubbish. 

XX 

Blackcats

Sorry to read about people's work challenges.  My work is awful at the moment - it only takes one or two people to completely change dynamics and atmosphere.  I had an awful day on Wednesday and Thursday but much better on Friday when diva was very quiet (I suspect she was having a sneaky day off).  I've decided to keep quiet, adopt a serene but superior cat-like face on teams calls and only push back if behaviour is going to adversely affect other people.  Well, that's the theory ......

anyway, I've been doing some more planning for your virtual housewarming party ....
firstly we can play guess who and try to match us to our user names,
then we can join you for a sit down at your table (I totally get your excitement at having a table again)
then we could have a moan about our work (we could ask your DC to wee on the floor to help us express our frustrations).   I know it was very annoying but I have a grudging admiration for the quantity and frequency of his wee on the floor antics 

oh and as true MSE friends we will bring our own milk as it is v expensive where you are.  

Alchemilla

@Blackcats weeing on the floor seems a very appropriate way to express work frustrations.