Crazy Cat Lady Chapter 5 - Trying to recover from the pandemic

Humdinger1

Yes @crazy_cat_lady we all look forward to your news - and that of the cats- but understand how busy you are and are just grateful when you can update.  No pressure love Humdinger xx 

f0xh0les

Well I for one am wondering how well the 'teddy bear fleece' duvet covers have survived washing and life with a teenager... and how the cats are doing. 10 school days left til half term (well it is over here in LE-shire).  Got everything crossed for you. You can do this.

juliejim

Hope you've had a relaxing half term.

Honeysucklelou2

Hi CCL,
Hope your term is going smoothly and that all is well in your world.

Buffythedebtslayer

Honeysucklelou2 said:

Hi CCL,
Hope your term is going smoothly and that all is well in your world.

From me too - I miss you XXX 

crazy_cat_lady

Right. Here is the situation.
I am really rubbish all of a sudden at keeping up to date on here - it has been literally months. And I rock up like nothing has happened and just sit and talk about myself then disappear again for months. I don't really know why it's happened other than that I feel like I'm really lazy but in reality, I'm not in the greatest of places and I am beyond busy all of the time.
Going from pandemic to almost 2 full time jobs was a real shocker. I mean the exam work is literally my dream job - I'm quite important there now and it's a lot of responsibility and I love it. But it's busy on top of teaching. May, June and July might as well not have existed at all and then suddenly most of September disappeared as well with the enquiries. I have been handsomely paid for the work and I am very grateful for that but I don't know where the time has gone.
Teaching continues to be a struggle. Not the actual teaching itself - I love being in the classroom and doing my 'thing'. But everything else. The admin and rules, the changes since the pandemic, the mental health of the kids... and then on top of it all, there are literally no supply teachers. Not one. Someone in my department had a stroke last week - she is younger than me and her kids are younger than mine. That has hit me quite hard emotionally because she has a very long recovery ahead of her and all we get at school is second hand information about her condition via her husband to our head of department. 
I have repeatedly mentioned it but I still feel incredibly hopeless about the situation in terms of the bigger picture at the moment. The government, Brexit, pandemic, nhs, cost of living etc. 
I finally made it to the front of the queue for therapy and that has been ongoing since July. There is good progress but I'd be lying if I said I was well. My mental health has been shockingly poor. However, the breakthrough for me was when my therapist actually listened to me when I suggested it was hormonal. I tracked my cycle for a couple of months and discovered I'm OK mentally at the beginning of the month, then literally on about day 14 it's like a switch is flipped and I become tearful and anxious, followed by hopelessly depressed for about 16 days. He helped me get up the courage to speak to my doctor about it - I had loads of blood tests and then finally I saw the doctor last week face to face, who agreed that I could try HRT. Except the gel they have prescribed me doesn't seem to be available anywhere. The pharmacy are trying to get it for me but can't say how long it will be.
I'm putting HRT onto my list of things I need but cannot get along with wooden cat litter and ibuprofen lysine. Maybe that doesn't seem important, but it is very important to me. 
I said earlier that I feel incredibly lazy - the opposite is true. Some days it's a struggle just to get out of bed and go to work, but I have that, then the exam stuff, then home and the kids and cats and I literally don't stop from about 6am until 9pm. Probably am burning out but I'm trying to take a bit of time for myself.

Tell you what - if I manage to post on here regularly for the next week or so then I'll start a new diary to help me make a fresh start. I called this one 'trying to recover from the pandemic' and I so far haven't managed that.

I hope that you're all well my lovelies. I do miss being on here and reading and posting - just things have to give and sometimes it's stuff I want to do for myself. 

Lots of love to you all.

Four_Seasons

Sending you love and hugs x

DawnW

sending love CCL

badmemory

It really annoys me that doctors do not seem to see the importance of HRT.  I was totally fit doing at least 12500 steps a day until they insisted I came off it.  Since then it has been down hill all the way.  Every time I see a woman (including me) shuffling round a supermarket I wonder how much faster she would be if only she had it.  When they made me come off, and I say made me because they pretended I had a choice, what choice did I have if they wouldn't write the prescription, my fitness deteriorated rapidly.  My hands became distorted & one knee & hip is in a very bad way.  MRI the week after next.  Just think how much they would have saved if they just let me stay on HRT. 

Unfortunately after my age 70 check up I no longer actually trust the doctors as they told me that giving up smoking 30 years ago had been of no benefit.  They can't have it both ways, either giving up was a good thing or it wasn't.  Actually for me it was a bad thing because when I gave up my thyroid also gave up the same as my fathers did.  Hereditary things can be quite interesting.

Drawingaline

Sorry to hear your woes. I am feeling a bit like you, everything is just so overwhelming right now. My sister went onto hrt and can suddenly walk much easier and her fibro is so much better, would appear it was mostly hormonal! She always struggled with her cycle and swears she has pmdd. My daughter has recently started tracking her cycle and symptons and we feel she is similar.

Can't help you with the hrt supply, but I feel you with the wooden cat littler, I have given up with pets at home and am having some luck with the smaller bags from W@itrose, get them delivered with my shopping. Although smaller the pellets seem to last longer. But we have had to compromise and use clay (hated it, awful stuff) and the very expensive paper pellets too. Luckily the boys seem OK using whatever litter we can get, but I much prefer the wood stuff.