Crazy Cat Lady Chapter 5 - Trying to recover from the pandemic

janb5

Hi CCL- remember that you have had more than your fair share of stresses in the last few years ( divorce, errant ex, financial worries  and not forgetting the cats!)So.... you`re allowed a wobble! 

I would remind you to be kind to yourself and remember what a fantastic job you`re doing being a great parent and role model to your lovely children.  Also think of that line in ` Planes, trains and automobiles` when John Candy says....`I like me!`

Sadly there will be more stresses etc and just as soon as you`ve knocked down a few skittles then some more turn up.  You`ve been very proactive and contacted Stepchange today so another skittle down.

Always think of how far you`ve come.

As an avid stalker on your blog, I can attest to that.  And as a fellow Geordie, ` you`re doing grand pet!

PS not sure whether you`re more Sunderland than Newcastle but you get the drift! xx

ladyholly

Dont feel ashamed s you have nothing to be ashamed about. Many people have blips with their debt free journey so dont beat yourself up. While you are home and possibly have a bit of time sit down and work out a new budget that is practical for you. Hopefully your exam work will return soon which will help. Good luck. As for your weight I am in the same boat and I need to lose some as due to a health condition I am possibly going to be prescribed steroids which will exacerbate the probel pounds. Trying to resist them at the moment.

beanielou

Fall down seven times & get up eight indeed.
Keep plodding 

crazy_cat_lady

Morning all
Nothing to report today. I had a lazy day yesterday of sitting on my backside, watching a box set and crocheting. Nothing very useful to be honest - although I got lots of my latest blanket done. Went out for a little walk just to get some fresh air, and hoovered right through the house as dd was bringing her boyfriend round. Didn't need to do any food prep as I batch cooked like a pro over the weekend so everything is in boxes either in the fridge or freezer. So I suppose I could have a day off without the guilt really.
Thanks for all of your support and encouragement. I wish I knew what it felt like to have all this inner confidence instead of always feeling like I'm just not quite good enough. I know I do well, I know I work hard and I know I always manage and I also know that I'm a decent person and people seem to like me. I just can't seem to be kind to myself, or see what others see. I get so focused on the negatives that I fail to see all of the positives. Never mind.
I have done my new budget. It is tight. But I have done very frugal and very tight budgeting before and gotten through it. I have plenty of places I can cut back on and although it will be unpleasant for a while at least I can afford to pay my bills. And hopefully in 6 months then I can sort out a mortgage and once and for all get rid of my ex.
Today's plans are pretty much like yesterday. Box set. Crochet (Christmas gifts) try not to stress. I've done a bit of school work which I'd left at the end of last week so I feel quite saintly. Cats are sorted, fed and cleaned and the kids are still sleeping. Cuppa and relax. I have a bit of a headache but still testing negative on my LFT. DS is in his last day of quarantine and driving me up the wall so obviously feeling loads better. I'm making him leave the house tomorrow for a nice long walk. 

jusferbrowsing

I've been following your posts far longer than I've been a forum member and I have to admit I'm in awe of how hard you work and what you've achieved over the years. Please try not to be so hard on yourself, the past 18 months have thrown most of us a bit off balance financially and you are doing amazingly well. 

triple_choc_chip

Hey CCL, is there any reason why you can’t do the solicitor process with your ex now? Perhaps to get that out of the way so that re-mortgaging later would be straightforward.
Also, is there any reason why you can’t start a new fixed term with your current mortgage company? If you chose one of their products they wouldn’t do a credit check.  Enjoy the half term break 💐

crazy_cat_lady

Hey everyone
Hope you're all doing well. I had a lovely, relaxing half term week and have been back at work for three days and am almost at breaking point. It's just hard at the moment - lots of minor annoyances that are slowly but surely building up and pushing me towards the edge. It seems to be one thing on top of another with no relief at all.
tcc - I'm in a bit of a pickle with regards to sorting the mortgage and deeds. Basically I can't get ex's name off the deeds until I have a new mortgage offer, and it seems I can't get a mortgage until ex's name is off the deeds. I don't have the energy to fight this at the moment - I'm feeling quite low so I just want to give myself a break, pay off some of my debts and try again in a few months when I get some motivation to fight again. No chance of a remortgage with my current provider as it's going into just my name rather than joint names, which is essentially a new application. It's all too complicated and stressful for my tiny brain to deal with so I need a break and a chance to pull myself back together again. It can wait for a while.
Other than that, it's just been a mad few days. Work is busy and quite unpleasant. I've worked through all breaks and lunches so far this week and not gotten away on time any night so far and I still have more things on my to do list than I can reasonably manage. My home broadband is intermittent again and it's getting on my nerves, dd's car needed picking up from the garage again (minor job this time but still a walk to the garage to get it back), ds got into a bit of trouble at school and got what I consider to be a really over the top punishment for a small 'crime', so I'm busy in dispute with the fools that I hate on the senior management team at his school. Needed cat litter, drove to get cat litter, shop had sold out of cat litter. Got a pumpkin latte to try and soothe myself and it tipped out on the floor in the back of the car - so not only had I spent £3+ on a posh coffee, I didn't get to drink it and ended up on hands and knees scrubbing the carpet in dd's car in the pitch black last night.
Woke up with a headache this morning. Crossed 3 items off my to do list at work and added another 6. Parents evening over the phone until 6pm. Home to find the sink stacked with dishes, cat litter trays needing emptying, bins needing put out and dd asking for me to taxi her somewhere. 
My mood is bad, but at least I am aware of it - I really do just need one fairly quiet day though - asap.

f0xh0les

Only 32 working days til Xmas!!   Put off everything put-off-able until after that.  

Coffee conspiring against you is just not on, I mean that kind of behaviour is totally unfair.   

I think you might just need to have another chat with your housemates about them being perfectly capable of wielding a pair of marig0lds and a soapy sponge.  I know you believe in them.   And after that maybe you could convince mine they are capable too     ((hugs))

Buffythedebtslayer

This half of the term is grim CCL. 

Really do give yourself a break mate. This is the hard slog. XXXX 

peb

I'm in a bit of a pickle with regards to sorting the mortgage and deeds. Basically I can't get ex's name off the deeds until I have a new mortgage offer, and it seems I can't get a mortgage until ex's name is off the deeds. I don't have the energy to fight this at the moment

Ok. I know that you don't have the energy at the moment but honestly it's simple, you simply complete the new mortgage and the Transfer of equity simultaneously.  If you need a judge to sign the transfer deed try and obtain an offer from a lender who either supplies an offer with a long life or in the view of the broker will extend easily.  NOT nationwide for example, they don't extend offers under any circumstance.  Pm me if you want to know more - bear in mind I'm not working because of cancer so may be in a chemo fog for up to a week. (My knowledge I'd from conveyancing not mortgage providing)