Future Proofing my life: Deposit saving then MFW journey in under 13 years

LadyWithAPlan · 12 February 2024 at 8:46PM

Sistergold said:

Have just been catching up! Oh so much going on and the taxi fare/situation ouch, but hey those are the memorable things in relationships sometimes especially if it progresses it will give you both something to laugh about. With some guys you find paying for a taxi would have been the first thing that happened and you realise when it all goes to pots that he is someone who just makes ladies to pick up the bills due to one excuse or the other lol. On this occasion though as he has not been resisting paying for all else we wait and see. I do get it though not being able or not wanting to ask about the taxi fare which he said he will pay. I am terrible though for things like that! Although I can afford to pay I hate it when a man says he will pay and he then just does not remember to fulfil. So let’s wait and see if he will tick another box of remembering “small” details of life which matter and do the taxi refund?

SG! Thanks for popping by ...
You make a valid point on the 'does he remember the small things..'. I mentioned it by way of passing yesterday via text and he got a bit shirty 'I didnt ask you to ..' so we will see ....and he not got back since so .. I normally hear from him daily. ..time will tell. No drama...

I do have another lunch date with someone else tomorrow - who I have not seen for a couple years though he kept in occasional touch ... I have decided to start at least trying on the odd date...
Had 2 friends including a male one suggest I text £111 uber man my bank details but I wont do that .. it may end up being a cheap-ish way of not wasting time with him ..

Sistergold said:

Getting serious after a long stretch of being single is tough. It can be scary I find to allow yourself to be in a vulnerable position of letting someone takeover or take care of certain aspects of your life. I understand though that without letting in relationships will not blossom.

Again very wise! Yes we have to risk being open..

Voluntary spending this month so far £223.08 which includes the £111 uber bill - so nealy 50%!!

Mortgage Broker - spoke to them today and they calling me tomorrow to get moving on this MIP so I can start looking. I have 2 lovely new neighbours - men - one does weldiing (I got v excited Sister Gold and he said he was happy to come round and do some DIY.. and the other a chef., It will be hard moving out of here but I always make friends with my neighbours
The flat I liked went for £405k apparently ...
I am thinking £400k for one bed with garden, or up to £450-£470k (ugh) for 2 bed with outdoor space is my parameters.. Need to go looking in some new areas.

Weekend round up NSD Friday only so 2/13
Saturday I bought some hair stuff, Sunday I bought a coffee out as I went to see some art for free and saw a friend. Today I bought more hair stuff (all YS) and 2 lots of bulbs to get two lamps working again, They look lovely now- havent been working for 6 months plus

I am aiming to not buy any unnecessary toiletries but I have ran out of all my expensive long lasting hair stuff - my leave in conditioner - bottle lasted 2yrs, my K18 which I use on occasion etc and I wanted to try the Olaplex 3.. Olaplex 3 I have used once but didnt dry my hair properly so hard to tell. I do know the K18 stuff works brilliantly for my kind of hair.,..
I will need some new mascara soon - I love my Mac stack and again it lasts months - especially as I wfh so not needed daily .. but using all the dregs and had a free sample small one I will get through first..

Alcohol seems to make me be lazy.. for a few days after - review from tracking ..
I went out on that date last week and drank - plus he was buying shots on top of the wine wine and I was not useful Thursday at college, and was v unproductive Fri and Sat - also stayed up late etc and read loads... which is fine but I have a lot of fun things I could be doing instead inc house finding!
As I am tracking things such as bedtime, MG, focus etc i can see this pattern... i also didnt go to the gym T/F/S - sunday I walked..
I normally only drink once a week and I am certainly a fun social drinker .. but if alcohol really is going to make me be lazy and unfocused for a few days ,..... I need to be wise as to when i do it .... So I saw a friend Sunday for a walk and some art - she then had wine and I had a coffee -..

No phone in bedroom - left it in kltchen again last night (not do this at weekend) and I slept so much better - definitely an important behaviour shift to me plus I cant start scrolling first thing...

Starting 100 envelope challenge today - 50 week challenge week 1 52 and 9 so £61 to find/make by selling this week
I read this post on ynab about doing the tiktok challenge virtually - basically have 100 envelopes - with amounts 1 to 100 on each one, so £1, £2, £3 etc - and then each week you pick 2 envelopes and try to save that amount that week bu reducing planned spend - or earn more - in my case my YNAB budget is tight but I am doing this to get me to start selling some things or indeed winning some things to then sell. If you do this for 50 weeks you will save £5050...
Article about it here here which has a spreadsheet if you dont want to do physical envelopes /cash..
I am using a random online number generator to pick my numbers and I have added the 1-100 in a ynab category to track

This week £52 and £9 - this I will find by selling stuff - need to add things to ebay and vinted or winning stuff - my budget is tight so

Clothes making course - enrolled finally !
I have been on the waiting list for this for ages and missed out last term. I sewed a bit as a teenager and did a class later but tried to make a hard jacket..., and have sewed cushions etc - but this course is about pattern cutting and adjustments - I want to start making some fun easy long summer dresses... starts next week. I love vintage but be nice to tailor them properly or know clearer if things can be altered to fit properly. or if would be too much hard work. I do have a friend who mends things quickly who i use but I want to start dreaming myself in fun rich fabrics..
I really want a Camilla kaftan for beach days but as they £400-£800 in the sale I figure I can buy some fabulous fabric and make my own !
I am missing my DIY courses.. but college Tues eve and Thursday afternoon/eve is a good mix of breaking up the week and doing fun things - plus classes are all free up to a certain level..

GYM - leg day /WALK today
I had to walk to the college to enrol - I could have bus-ed it but saved money and it was a gorgeous sunny day and I am trying to get more exercise.. so 60 min walk plus I deliberately wore my gym gear so I then went straight to my gym and did leg weights and abs.. I didnt take my swimming gear but had walked so enough cardio

FOOD
Food today was the last portion of this actually v tasty HF recipe served with broccoli and organic spinach - I swapped the yogurt for DF - but the turmeric potatoes on top of the curry was a lovely change from rice.. I dont like to eat much lamb but my last box of 4 meals from HF i picked largely to try the recipes and this was a keeper - I will probably use beef instead..

Golden Potato Topped Lamb Rogan Josh with Lentils and Yoghurt

I still have one HF meal from last week and the non perishable ingredients for the very tasty lentil and mushroom pie from a couple weeks ago.. Recipe here

Beetroot soup
I made a chicken stock from my lidl FR chicken Saturday and having used some in the curry I have just pressure cooked some beetroots so I will make a borsch this evening.

DF GF banana raspberry protein pancake
I also made my protein powder with GF oats cakey thing - I have loads of vegan choc protein powder in as in 2 huge tubs from a subscribe and save gine wild - I prefer the strawberry - so I want to start using the choc down before I buy more strawberry ... the cakey thing v tasty and v nutritious - added flaxseed, seeds, chia, peanut butter - no added sugar etc as well. I cook this for travelling a lot but will start making it more for home as well.

HM bread - my fruit (raisins/mixed peel) and mixed seed HM GF bread (1/3 brown 2/23 white) I made last week - I froze most in slices so that has been a lovely healthy treat to get out ...- whether with scrambled eggs, a chicken and DF cheese sandwich with red onions and savoury cashew cream or with PB.

So far my Grocery spend £64.58 plus £9.80 bulk in Feb has been good but I did have the 4 HF meals delivered Sun 3rd feb which were paid previously and as a credit so,, Freezer is full - though I am now out of kale ...argh - I need to buy some and freeze it as running out of dark greens is often the reason for me to go shopping,

Hope all are well and enjoying the sunshine finally appearing

savingholmes · 12 February 2024 at 10:00PM

The course sounds like it will give you a lot of pleasure.

Good luck with the flat hunt.

SandyShores · 12 February 2024 at 10:34PM

I always say to DD that she needs a man who will add to her life, not take away from it - you have such a full and interesting life ladywithaplan - I'm sure you will meet the right one.

I would love to do a clothes making course. When I was a stone or so heavier I had a rule that I couldn't buy any brand new clothes until I'd lost weight. So I used to spend a lot of time in charity shops and I altered clothes (as in shortened or took in by increasing the seams) regularly. It worked, and I lost weight, but I would love to have the skills to make proper adjustments.

LadyWithAPlan · 13 February 2024 at 12:05AM

SandyShores said:

I always say to DD that she needs a man who will add to her life, not take away from it - you have such a full and interesting life ladywithaplan - I'm sure you will meet the right one.

I would love to do a clothes making course. When I was a stone or so heavier I had a rule that I couldn't buy any brand new clothes until I'd lost weight. So I used to spend a lot of time in charity shops and I altered clothes (as in shortened or took in by increasing the seams) regularly. It worked, and I lost weight, but I would love to have the skills to make proper adjustments.

This is wise advice to your daughter ... Its only cos I have started dating again I am seeing the crazies turn up

I hav built a fabulous life as you say and the house buying is happening no matter who I date

I think £111 uber man is sulking cos I might have hit his pride in mentioning the uber - did it off hand as I said i mentioned him and it to a friend which I did ... whats that Bowie song again ... the one about dust?

I think your alteration skills are already greater than mine but I the course outline looks v promising
- pattern cutting, sewing and making skills. Plus develop your creative ideas ...

@savingholmes I plan to have fun and try making easy dresses!! with stretch fabric!
hope you settling in OK

MG - 12 things today - just ran around to get to my 12 target today before bed

pebbles01 · 13 February 2024 at 8:14AM

I couldn't agree more than with @SandyShores - any man should bring something to your life, and don't settle for anything less. Good friends can bring so much happiness, which is why I'm not fussed about meeting anyone. I like how you refer to your date as £111 Uber man and not just Uber man!

You sound like you are making fabulous progress. Good luck with the MIP later today and also with finding new areas to look in. I can completely relate to what you mean when thinking about buying at the top of your budget. In the end I did that, but I don't regret it now. It means things are harder for me (and at the moment I have a lodger for the next 3 months). However I love my home and I know I'll be in it for 20 years +. I bought just before I was 42 and realistically I know I won't have the budget for repeated moves, and I wanted to make a home in one area.

Having a lodger is hard. This one is ideal though. He leaves for the gym about 5.30am, and gets back about 6.30pm, makes dinner, has a shower and goes to bed. He doesn't come home on a Friday night, and gets back about 10.30pm on Sunday, as he goes back to his wife and family. Having the house to myself at weekends is lovely. If you do buy a two-bed at the top of your budget, having a lodger is always an option, but it isn't easy. When this one leaves at the end of April, I won't replace. I'd rather have the room for friends and family to stay over. I like having the space to myself as well.

LadyWithAPlan · 13 February 2024 at 12:13PM

Thanks @pebbles01
I think having a 2 bed and the safety of being able to have a lodger if needed is a great safety back line - except I have always lived on my own - but be good if possible

that 1 bed flat I saw though had a separate dining area then a long garden so .. that why I am thinking maybe a one bed

the mortgage broker is applying for my MIP now so fingers crossed ! Going for a £350k with £125k mortgage /deposit so 75%
wish me luck - feeling v grown up and a bit sick !

Off for a lunch date as well today - all happening here !

Not heard from £111 Uber man and normally hear every day so think I have wounded his pride - not stressing about it .. but am aware !

PennysIntoPounds · 13 February 2024 at 12:56PM

Good luck with MIP and lunch date!
If £111 man is sulking and is happy to show off with drinks but not be gentlemanly enough to pay you back for an act of kindness then he is not sounding like a contender

South_coast · 13 February 2024 at 1:33PM

Anyone else wishing the cab had cost £7 more, so we could call him 118 guy?

(As a side note, always wanted to go out dressed like this on a night out - probably missed my moment now, as most people out on a Fri/Sat night too young to remember it 🤣!)

Suffolk_lass · 13 February 2024 at 2:28PM

Maybe you should call him Horatio as the number 111 in cricket is known as a Nelson (and 222 as a double Nelson, and so on). Famously David Shepherd, the test match umpire would raise and shake a leg at 111 so as to ward off ill fate (rumour being that more wickets fell on 111 after a batsman scored a century). So either Horatio or hop-along are my suggestions