I don't want my debit card sent at my home address, what should I do? Please read, diff story & Qs

colsten

Sea_Shell said:

If you are able to move money "under the radar", how much could you afford to squirrel away monthly, after all your other usual outgoings?

From what the OP has told us so far, I conclude that moving any money "under the radar" would be impossible, as her father examines her bank statements in detail. Major flaw in this "plan", unless we misunderstand what we have been told..

callum9999

General_Grant said:

You are fooling yourself.  Your "plan" would take too long.  If you are thinking of "investing", you can as easily lose money as make it.

You surely must know you simply have to get out of that accommodation to somewhere where you can continue your employment and break free from the relationship.

You don't have to contact any authorities about his behaviour.  You just have to be an adult woman and get out.

I don't think saying "just be an adult" is fair to the people suffering under this kind of thing. Unless you've been through it yourself, it can be difficult to understand exactly how it feels.

People can't always think and/or act rationally in those situations. Though I'd certainly hope they wouldn't be staying unnecessarily because they won't leave before they get the "perfect" new house. Surely anywhere is better.

silverwhistle

Eholic said:

  These days, one bedroom properties are no less than £700/£800 a month. That's just the rent.

Until I bought my house at the age of 28 I lived for a time in a shared house and didn't even have a car. I've worked at a local Foyer where people moved in having been on the streets or sofa surfing and heard plenty of tales of bad situations. You need to move, even to such a temporary place from where you can then re-establish yourself.

Without reading the whole thread it seems you are making excuses for not doing anything: nobody will tell you these things are easy.

born_again

colsten said:

Sea_Shell said:

If you are able to move money "under the radar", how much could you afford to squirrel away monthly, after all your other usual outgoings?

From what the OP has told us so far, I conclude that moving any money "under the radar" would be impossible, as her father examines her bank statements in detail. Major flaw in this "plan", unless we misunderstand what we have been told..

>>Yes every month, and he knows which home bills I am paying and anything which is not bills payment related will be questioned. That's only if he catches the non-bill payment in time before it moves further down the days (provided I haven't spent a major amount to cause any suspicions) and is no longer in sight (unless of course a bank statement is requested).<<<<
Exactly.

To move any sort of meaning full amount would take years.
Your other suggestion is spot on.

Sea_Shell

colsten said:

Sea_Shell said:

If you are able to move money "under the radar", how much could you afford to squirrel away monthly, after all your other usual outgoings?

From what the OP has told us so far, I conclude that moving any money "under the radar" would be impossible, as her father examines her bank statements in detail. Major flaw in this "plan", unless we misunderstand what we have been told..

I realise that, I was just trying to get a sense of how much was available to be "saved", over and above OP's usual outgoings and how long it might have taken to save up a significant balance, even under normal circumstances.

Being "under the radar" or not, may be of little or no significance if you can only put aside £50 a month.

Alex9384

Monzo does have the option to send your card to a different address. I've done it once.
During the application you choose your own PIN (no waiting for any letters) and it then ask you if you want your card delivered to your address or a different address.

Alex9384

HSBC is probably the worst bank you can ever choose for something like this. I had loads and loads of post coming from them, they also required me to send something back to them, and it took ages to open the account.

colsten

Alex9384 said:

Monzo does have the option to send your card to a different address. I've done it once.
During the application you choose your own PIN (no waiting for any letters) and it then ask you if you want your card delivered to your address or a different address.

The OP said they have nobody who could receive mail on her behalf.