We really can't afford the house we want/need will things get better for us or just forget it?

mrsmortgage

With the best will in the world, you decided to have more children when it sounds as though your house wasn't suitable, and from a previous post you say that you knew even then that the next step up the ladder was unaffordable and unachievable. 

I'm not sure what you want anyone to do to help you. You can't afford the house you want in the area you want.

If you don't go on expensive family holidays how long would it be before you could save the extra deposit that you need? If you do go on expensive holidays then you have to accept that the next move will always be out of reach.

Living frugally needn't mean that the children are missing out. There are lots of free and cheap places in the UK to visit.

As I've mentioned, it would probably take us around 5 years, when the oldest will be 18, and the girls will be 16 and 15. We'd through the holiday fund to it (and the car and general unnecessary expenses).  

Our lifestyle is more expensive than average because my family lives abroad and I do need to go and visit which adds up to! 

Adsta

See if family can gift you more money to help bump you up to what you need?
You could always try low ball bids on places you like the look of, 30-50k is a fair amount though to drop. If your area is popular this more than likely will not work.

mrsmortgage

Adsta said:

See if family can gift you more money to help bump you up to what you need?
You could always try low ball bids on places you like the look of, 30-50k is a fair amount though to drop. If your area is popular this more than likely will not work.

We're getting £20k if we need them, and eventually we'd get other amount. The family business is in the process of being sold, but I've seen this happening for the last 10 years, honestly until I go and sign the paperwork I won't believe it has happened. And that's what we've been doing, we've been viewing houses way above what we can afford but the one we'd like the most we're still short by £20k.  

mrsmortgage

Which is what we've decided to do. To get on with our lives, forget this house for now. Maybe that money will eventually come through, maybe I'll get a significant pay rise but in the meantime enjoy what we've got. 

moneysavinghero

mrsmortgage said:

Adsta said:

RelievedSheff said:

Have to agree with this. My parents went a good few years when I was a kid (with a brother) with no holidays so they could save the more money they needed for a bigger place. 

I do feel some parents now over worry about luxury type holidays for kids, which they are not going to remember all that well. But they will remember the house they grew up in. 

What you have to see here is that the timeline doesn't really benefit the older kids.  We'd have to go without any holidays and live fairly frugally until they'd be 18, 16, and 15. It's really not worth FOR them. The baby yes, would have to not have his very own room for the time being, but he'd eventually get one when he's 6? 

You are presuming that all your kids will want to flee the nest as soon as they get to 18. Housing is difficult to afford, a lot of kids are staying in the family home well into adulthood. Privacy when they are older would be worth a lot more to them than it does now.

hazyjo

Look for something with a bedroom less that can be extended or converted. That'd solve your problem and prob be cheaper.

mrsmortgage

moneysavinghero said:

You are presuming that all your kids will want to flee the nest as soon as they get to 18. Housing is difficult to afford, a lot of kids are staying in the family home well into adulthood. Privacy when they are older would be worth a lot more to them than it does now.

We're moving though.... and that's a  hard deadline. If they want to come cross-country with us great but if not, well sorry, but we're moving. I don't like where we live at all, and I could be making double what I'm making somewhere else. My husband nor I are from this area, we ended up here by chance, and he needs to go up country to look after his elderly mother one day. So that timeline works for us very well. Houses over there are much cheaper in comparison so win, win too in that way. 

mrsmortgage

hazyjo said:

Look for something with a bedroom less that can be extended or converted. That'd solve your problem and prob be cheaper.

Which is why we're also looking at three beds too, but no joy so far. 

mrsmortgage

We also thought we could do a loft conversion in our current house, no one to blame but ourselves there, but we're slightly hesitant for the same reasons. 

badger09

mrsmortgage said:

moneysavinghero said:

You are presuming that all your kids will want to flee the nest as soon as they get to 18. Housing is difficult to afford, a lot of kids are staying in the family home well into adulthood. Privacy when they are older would be worth a lot more to them than it does now.

We're moving though.... and that's a  hard deadline. If they want to come cross-country with us great but if not, well sorry, but we're moving. I don't like where we live at all, and I could be making double what I'm making somewhere else. My husband nor I are from this area, we ended up here by chance, and he needs to go up country to look after his elderly mother one day. So that timeline works for us very well. Houses over there are much cheaper in comparison so win, win too in that way. 

I'm really confused.
Why do you have a hard deadline for moving?
When did 'cross-country' come into play? I thought you couldn't move far as children couldn't change schools due to shared custody.
Where is 'over there', where houses are much cheaper? Is it the same place as you could be making double what you earn now?

If none of this is relevant, or has been covered before, please ignore me: