We really can't afford the house we want/need will things get better for us or just forget it?

mrsmortgage

I think we'd rather compromise on the house. Might not be a "wise" decision, but to some extent seems the "fairest" to all the children. in 8 years when we move from this area, the baby will be on his own for at least another 8 years, and then he'll enjoy having bigger house, a room to himself, nice holidays, etc... 

hazyjo

Does it really matter if the kids have smaller rooms? Would they care if it meant having a garden and bigger house? Would it give them their own extra room downstairs? Not too have to share (which is what I think you're saying), or is it just to let the youngest have their own room later - because they've not had their own room to even compare against so I'd not worry about them getting a smaller room.

mrsmortgage

RelievedSheff said:

What do you appreciate the most. A family home you are happy with or a holiday that is been and gone in a week or two?

If you want that house then you will have to make sacrifices to get it.

I'm a firm believer that holidays remain for a life time. I had a grand house when I was growing up, to me it was just a house.... But all of those holidays I've been top I've always cherished them. I've asked the children and they'd prefer that too. Especially because they know they'd never get to "enjoy" the house. 

Adsta

RelievedSheff said:

What do you appreciate the most. A family home you are happy with or a holiday that is been and gone in a week or two?
If you want that house then you will have to make sacrifices to get it.

Have to agree with this. My parents went a good few years when I was a kid (with a brother) with no holidays so they could save the more money they needed for a bigger place. 

I do feel some parents now over worry about luxury type holidays for kids, which they are not going to remember all that well. But they will remember the house they grew up in. 

mrsmortgage

hazyjo said:

Does it really matter if the kids have smaller rooms? Would they care if it meant having a garden and bigger house? Would it give them their own extra room downstairs? Not too have to share (which is what I think you're saying), or is it just to let the youngest have their own room later - because they've not had their own room to even compare against so I'd not worry about them getting a smaller room.

It does matter. My daughter has always made a MASSIVE deal that she doesn't have her own room. In their current room at least is big enough that can be divided in "two sections". She has one at her dad's. All the houses we've seen don't really give us that much extra room, the piano wouldn't fit in many of them (for starters), we'd get a bigger kitchen but that's about it.

None of the older children spend any time outside, my daughter grew in a house with a massive garden, she never used it (and still doesn't) and the other two grew up in a house with no outdoor space, so they don't really appreciate it. 

Justonemorecupoftea

If your salary has gone up meaning you can borrow, does that mean it's the deposit that's the issue? Could you look at a 5% ltv product?
How much equity do you have in your current house (also has the been valued recently)?
Or is it repayments on the bigger borrowing?

Either way it sounds like you might have to make a few lifestyle changes. Either a few years of less expensive holidays, Christmas gifts etc to get a better deposit (whilst also increasing equity) or a look at budgeting to increase your affordability.

mrsmortgage

Adsta said:

RelievedSheff said:

Have to agree with this. My parents went a good few years when I was a kid (with a brother) with no holidays so they could save the more money they needed for a bigger place. 

I do feel some parents now over worry about luxury type holidays for kids, which they are not going to remember all that well. But they will remember the house they grew up in. 

What you have to see here is that the timeline doesn't really benefit the older kids.  We'd have to go without any holidays and live fairly frugally until they'd be 18, 16, and 15. It's really not worth FOR them. The baby yes, would have to not have his very own room for the time being, but he'd eventually get one when he's 6? 

gwynlas

Are you saying that you want a 5 bed house so that each child gets their own room? There are very few of these built as most families put children together. Maybe you should be looking at houses with an extra reception room that could be used as a bedroom or an integral garage that could be converted. 

xylophone

We need the pother room for our toddler 

He's reached the "terrible twos"?

Adsta

Depends on how much realistically you could save and how quickly. Have you spoken to a mortgage broker since you have had you increase to see if you can onward purchase higher? 

If that still comes back with you can't afford. Like others have mentioned, need to try figure out which is the higher priority and aim for it. If keeping holidays is and not cutting back on current lifestyle, you can keep it, but you forgo a bigger place. 

You sure you can't change area or move location? Other places around the country have public transport etc, depending on if you want to keep the kids in the same schools etc. Again that's a priority that needs to be taken.