Friend owes me thousands

sim2335

Sea_Shell said:

You say this friend is married but his wife doesn't know he owes you £6k.

Surely she'll (they'll) already have other plans for this redundancy money.

New kitchen, new car or need to live on it.

Sorry, but the chances of you seeing any of it is close to zero.

He's more likely to ask you for MORE money!!

That’s correct married and wife doesn’t know...he spends all spare money he has on gambling no idea how he hides it from his wife she thinks he’s stopped

i doubt I will see much plus he won’t even have a job..he’s just been lying about it to get more money of me 

[Deleted User]

sim2335 said:

Sea_Shell said:

You say this friend is married but his wife doesn't know he owes you £6k.

Surely she'll (they'll) already have other plans for this redundancy money.

New kitchen, new car or need to live on it.

Sorry, but the chances of you seeing any of it is close to zero.

He's more likely to ask you for MORE money!!

That’s correct married and wife doesn’t know...he spends all spare money he has on gambling no idea how he hides it from his wife she thinks he’s stopped

i doubt I will see much plus he won’t even have a job..he’s just been lying about it to get more money of me 

You’re not going to see any of the money...ever. 

gettingtheresometime

OP 
If he's been made unemployed then hasn't it crossed your mind that if his wife knows that he's been made unemployed, she will be expecting to see some sort of redundancy payment in March ? So how on earth do you think he's going to explain away the fact he hasn't received it, if he  gives it to you ?

If he hasn't told his wife he's been made redundant then he'll be needing to use that redundancy payment to 'cover' his monthly salary.
Either way I doubt if you'll ever see a penny of that redundancy payment.

sim2335

He said to me he’s gona tell her he got less, 

ZaSa1418

sim2335 said:

He said to me he’s gona tell her he got less, 

I imagine he is saying that to keep you sweet. Look if i was a gambler i would put money on him getting more money from you  between now and March than you will get from his redundancy. 
You really need to block him and move on with your life, he isn't your friend and as you have said he doesn't have anything over you he is just going to spread rumours potentially like a child in a playground. 

Sea_Shell

Why are you believing a single thing that comes from his mouth?

Sorry, but he is using you.

You need to see this for what it is and stop making excuses for cutting contact.

When was the last time you had any contact with him?   That time should already be the last.

Only you can make that happen.   

Nothing any of us say can make a jots difference to the situation.   We can't make him stop.

All we can do is try and help empower you to make a change.

You need to break the cycle.

amanda_p

You don't tell him anything. Don't send him messages saying if you don't pay me I will...........whatever. Just block all contact now,you don't owe him any explanation. Block his number in your phone,change any social media profile where he can contact you. Don't wait until March, do it now and move on. This person is toxic,get him out of your life now. No excuses do it now.People never change.

sim2335

It’s not for exaplination it’s for my own piece of mind I don’t wanna keep thinking what if he comes back...

I totally get where you guys coming from do it now, I’m also curieos about march 

Sea_Shell

Curiosity killed the cat!

amanda_p

Speaking to him will not give you peace of mind. No contact will. I wouldn't be curious about March, he will use this money for gambling or wasting on other things. He will not use it to pay you back. The longer you procrastinate, the worse it will be. If you want to involve the police citing him for harassment,do it now and block him at the same time. Don't tell him anything as he needs to be caught off guard. If you continue to carry on, waiting and talking to him you are enabling him to manipulate you.
Stand up to this bully, turn your back on him,ignore any other issues with him,don't speak to his wife etc. It is his problem and learn from your mistake, neither a lender or a borrower be.
I am afraid you need to draw a line under the £6000 , I doubt you will see this but if you sever all contact you may have peace of mind.Invaluable.