Hints and tips welcome to discourage someone from drinking too much

elsien

What else has the person got in his life to help take his mind off the alcohol and the need to drink? I know it's difficult at the moment with Covid to get out and do things but if the person is just in his flat all day then there's possibly an element of depression and self-medicating going on.
Is the person willing to engage with any alcohol recovery services at all, via the GP or elsewhere? Alchohol meets a need. To give up means finding other ways to meet that need which has to come from the person themselves and it doesn't sound as if your relative is at that point yet. Has the GP done any other forms of screening for mental health at all? 
Any trigger is likely to be a fall that lands them up in hospital, but sadly I've seen too many people discharged then straight back to drinking again. There isn't an easy answer unfortunately. 

Aranyani

It seems like you might live with this person?  If that's the case consider whether that is going to be what you want going forward assuming that they remain a dependent drinker, because the chances of that ever changing are very very small.  

theoretica

I wonder if giving him smaller glasses might be a nudge to slightly reduce the size of each drink.  Unless you think smaller drinks would backfire by leading back to more of them.

lincroft1710

It may be, because the person is in their 70s, they think that their best years are gone and the future holds little for them, so why not enjoy today and drinking is what they enjoy doing. 

cymruchris

There’s definitely no easy answer - and realistically I know I can’t stop them drinking full stop - there’s definitely been progress - but when you’re the non drinker - you want to see more. 

Lockdown hasn’t helped as they’ve not wanted to go out - they do have a nice garden view - so they are lucky that they’re not restricted to a flat. About the only thing that interests now are bird visits to the garden / so I’ve got just about every type of food there is - and we’ve gone from just goldfinches to a whole host of visitors - but that’s not helping in the alcohol reduction. 

In a sense I can see the inevitable coming - but don’t want to think this way - continues to drink - doesn’t eat properly - one of these days the next fall might be the one which ends up in the hospital visit - and then that might be the beginning of the end. It’s just preparing myself for what could come next. 

Skibunny40

The only thing that worked with my dad was watering down his whisky gradually by removing a small amount of whisky in the bottle and topping up with water - increasing the amount of water each day very slowly until he was drinking at a level that I could cope with (he's now having slightly less than a standard bottle of whisky in a litre bottle each day). The other piece of advice is to request a prescription for thiamine from the GP, as they become vitamin deficient and that can affect their mobility (apart from all the falling over!)

MalMonroe

A relative of mine is also an alcoholic and she has just had to have a leg amputated above the knee because of too much drinking causing self-neglect and malnutrition.  She's in her early 60s and her brother died from alcoholism at the age of 48. So even having had her sibling killed by alcohol did not ring any alarm bells. Plus, now she's been discharged from hospital, she's back on the booze. Nothing can stop her, she doesn't even think there's a problem. And that's true of most alcoholics. 

Alcoholism is a very serious illness and it's great if the person who drinks far too much can be helped at the beginning of their addiction but all too often it's too late.

Sadly you just cannot do anything to help because they themselves have got to want to stop. If they drink themselves to death, it's their choice - this was very hard for us to hear, from my relative's hospital consultant. Withholding alcohol is not for anyone else to do. In my relative's case we had to pick up the pieces as she collapsed and almost died. Yet she still denies to this day that anything was ever, or is now, wrong with her. Even after having the amputation! The doctors say her mental state has been 'altered' by alcohol. Which means she just can't comprehend a lot of things. 

I'm really very sorry. Someone suggested Al Anon and I think that's a very good idea because you, as relatives of an alcoholic - like my family - need some support and advice. But that's all we can have. 

cymruchris

Skibunny40 said:

The only thing that worked with my dad was watering down his whisky gradually by removing a small amount of whisky in the bottle and topping up with water - increasing the amount of water each day very slowly until he was drinking at a level that I could cope with (he's now having slightly less than a standard bottle of whisky in a litre bottle each day). The other piece of advice is to request a prescription for thiamine from the GP, as they become vitamin deficient and that can affect their mobility (apart from all the falling over!)

He'd spot that a mile off - I had thought of it. He's taking lots of vitamin supplements and calcium as he was diagnosed with osteoporosis. (Another reason not to fall over!) 

cymruchris

MalMonroe said:

A relative of mine is also an alcoholic and she has just had to have a leg amputated above the knee because of too much drinking causing self-neglect and malnutrition.  She's in her early 60s and her brother died from alcoholism at the age of 48. So even having had her sibling killed by alcohol did not ring any alarm bells. Plus, now she's been discharged from hospital, she's back on the booze. Nothing can stop her, she doesn't even think there's a problem. And that's true of most alcoholics. 

You'd think that in itself would be a big wake up call - but it's the same here - the number of falls this year has gone into double figures - but that still has little/no impact on the amounts consumed. I'll keep on encouraging reductions - but I'm resigned to the fact that it'll never stop, nor get down to a reasonable level. 

elsien

Without wanting to worry you any more than you already are, be aware of the possibility of alcohol related brain injury.
 https://alcoholchange.org.uk/alcohol-facts/fact-sheets/alcohol-related-brain-damage-arbd-signs-and-symptoms 
Again, there’s nothing you can do if the person won’t stop drinking but it can also impact on them stopping as they just don’t remember sometimes why they need to or the impact alcohol has on them.