son has my savings

Eco_Miser

msallen said:

uk1 said:

csgohan4 said:

guess another one hit wonder OP

Absolutely.  Outrageous that someone doesn’t comeback for a bit of ritual mutilation. 

There's a difference between not coming back (to read any responses to a post), and not replying having read them.

And this OP was last active just 11 minutes after joining the forum.

Of course it's possible to read the forum without logging in, so she could have read (and be reading) the responses. We'll never know.

Apodemus

msallen said:

uk1 said:

csgohan4 said:

guess another one hit wonder OP

Absolutely.  Outrageous that someone doesn’t comeback for a bit of ritual mutilation. 

There's a difference between not coming back (to read any responses to a post), and not replying having read them.

Indeed, and also between logging-in versus just looking online to read the responses as a guest.  So although the OP has not logged-in since making the original post, we really have no idea whether she is still following the thread.

London7766551

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

London7766551

John_ said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Oh come off it! He gave the money to you to hide it from those to whom he owes it. He’ll be pleading poverty to ask for a smaller settlement figure, or intending to go bankrupt.

I'd be very careful about making unfounded allegations. If you are accusing someone of wrong doing you better have the evidence to back it up. If I was identifiable it would easily fall into defamation. You are accusing me of wrong doing. You should think about what you are posting before you post it.

ZeroSum

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

You've spent the whole thread accusing others of jumping to conclusions, and here you are doing just that. I've made no comment on criminal investigations etc. 

My only point I've made on this, is that there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it.

And the example you gave doesn't show otherwise, in fact it just adds to it. 

London7766551

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

You've spent the whole thread accusing others of jumping to conclusions, and here you are doing just that. I've made no comment on criminal investigations etc. 

My only point I've made on this, is that there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it.

And the example you gave doesn't show otherwise, in fact it just adds to it. 

What does "fishy" mean in your book? You knew what you were doing, please don't play dumb and dig yourself a whole this time. You suggested the money is being hidden. I am sure this could be criminal in certain situations. Another poster that should think before they post.

I told you why the money was transferred in my example, accept it or don't. The world will still turn.

ZeroSum

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

You've spent the whole thread accusing others of jumping to conclusions, and here you are doing just that. I've made no comment on criminal investigations etc. 

My only point I've made on this, is that there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it.

And the example you gave doesn't show otherwise, in fact it just adds to it. 

What does "fishy" mean in your book? You knew what you were doing, please don't play dumb and dig yourself a whole this time. You suggested the money is being hidden. I am sure this could be criminal in certain situations. Another poster that should think before they post.

I told you why the money was transferred in my example, accept it or don't. The world will still turn.

What on earth are you going on about?

London7766551

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

You've spent the whole thread accusing others of jumping to conclusions, and here you are doing just that. I've made no comment on criminal investigations etc. 

My only point I've made on this, is that there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it.

And the example you gave doesn't show otherwise, in fact it just adds to it. 

What does "fishy" mean in your book? You knew what you were doing, please don't play dumb and dig yourself a whole this time. You suggested the money is being hidden. I am sure this could be criminal in certain situations. Another poster that should think before they post.

I told you why the money was transferred in my example, accept it or don't. The world will still turn.

What on earth are you going on about?

You said you did not make any comment on criminal investigations, but you stated my example was "fishy". This would seem to suggest you think there is some kind of wrong doing taking place. Hence my comment about criminal investigations. You are also being deliberately obtuse. 

I have explained more than once to you and another poster why in my case a parent had transferred money to me as in the case with the OP. In every reply, you have attempted indirectly to suggest I was not being truthful.

"But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it."

"Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. "

" there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it."

If you want to play judge (a rather bad small minded one who seems to suggest wrong doing without evidence), that is fine by me. I have explained my explanation as to why the money was transferred. I have nothing more to say on this matter. If you do not believe me then we will have to agree to disagree. I am sure the established legal and banking systems will continue to work without your guidance on MSE. 

ZeroSum

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

ZeroSum said:

London7766551 said:

What's with all the condemnation of the OP's decision? It is fairly common for parents to trust their children.

In the past I have been given chunks of money (more than the OP gave) to look after. My parents trust me with their accounts. Sure I have the "power" to take all of the money and do a runner, but this is my parents money and why would I do such a thing? although I am sure it does occur. Most people have a good trusting relationship with their parents. 

Personally if I had children i'd like to think I could give them money to look after as an adult. It is fairly common as I say and if the relationship is good and normal it should be acceptable. In addition my late grandmother gave my mother rights to her account and total control of her life savings, in the event she became incapable of looking after herself, and 10 years later it happened. As I say this happens all the time, the OP was not wrong to do it assuming the relationship was very good prior to now.

To the OP, I would try to talk to your son again and apologise to his child. He is worked up but hopefully will see sense. 

Why?
The only reason really is the aforementioned benefit fraud.

Is it that common? I've never heard of it. As what you're talking about is completely different to power of attorney on an elderly relatives own bank accounts. 

Fraud? I don't see how it would be of benefit to hand over money to someone else. If they can see you have money, they can also see that you have sent the money somewhere else surely. 

Some relatives cannot handle money. ie if they have it they burn it. So they give it to someone else to keep hold of it. I admit it requires trust!

Well it is very common in my neck of the woods. I'd be very sad as a parent (I am not) to have such mistrust over my children.

If you have savings over £16k then you lose benefits. So yes, fraud.

Also if you've managed to accumulate that sort of sums, then you ain't the sort of person who money burns a hole in their pocket. 
I know those sort of people exist, and the handing over of cash to look after is no more than £100 a month just to make Xmas easier. 

I can't see how many people would commit fraud in such a way. The numbers must be very low. Lots of people only touch benefits as a last resort. They will rather burn their savings.
It would be more a case of someone being made redundant, or having some sort of win.

Of course it will be low, as people on benefits don't generally have that sort of money. 
But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it. The only reasons you've given for handing over cash in general are for people who wouldnt have that sort of money in the first place. 

Redundancy, you'd need that money to live on, so wouldnt hand it over if your claim about burning through savings is true. 
Winnings, potentially comes back to benefit fraud 

People on these forums really are condescending and judgemental. I have already cited an example of my own parents giving me money to look after. It's perfectly sound if you come into some winnings or draw on early retirement funds (before retirement) to keep a chunk of the money. In my fathers case he received around 20k from retirement funds (part of his pension), he used some of this, but being someone who has vast debts he gave me the money to look after simply because he cannot handle money. If he has the power to spend it, he would have. So I kept it in my account until he really needed it. Currently he plans to use it to purchase a van but is not ready to do so yet, so I will keep the money until then. If the money was in his account, he would spend it over time and it would be gone. Should he pay off some of his debt, yes I would agree but he doesn't want to and I am not going to try to tell him how to spend the money. I would ask people on here to have more of an open mind in these matters.

Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. 

I couldn't care less if it sounds "fishy", that is what happened. You speak as if it's not possible for these things to be checked in cases of criminal wrong doing. Well they can check, and if there was wrong doing the police or whoever is investigating would be able to obtain bank statements etc.

You've spent the whole thread accusing others of jumping to conclusions, and here you are doing just that. I've made no comment on criminal investigations etc. 

My only point I've made on this, is that there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it.

And the example you gave doesn't show otherwise, in fact it just adds to it. 

What does "fishy" mean in your book? You knew what you were doing, please don't play dumb and dig yourself a whole this time. You suggested the money is being hidden. I am sure this could be criminal in certain situations. Another poster that should think before they post.

I told you why the money was transferred in my example, accept it or don't. The world will still turn.

What on earth are you going on about?

You said you did not make any comment on criminal investigations, but you stated my example was "fishy". This would seem to suggest you think there is some kind of wrong doing taking place. Hence my comment about criminal investigations. You are also being deliberately obtuse. 

I have explained more than once to you and another poster why in my case a parent had transferred money to me as in the case with the OP. In every reply, you have attempted indirectly to suggest I was not being truthful.

"But youre still skirting around the reason for handing over large sums of cash to someone else. There's no reason to do it."

"Sorry but that sounds somewhat fishy, even more so with the not pay off debt then hiding the cash. "

" there isn't really any reason to transfer large sums of cash to other people to look after unless you're trying to hide it."

If you want to play judge (a rather bad small minded one who seems to suggest wrong doing without evidence), that is fine by me. I have explained my explanation as to why the money was transferred. I have nothing more to say on this matter. If you do not believe me then we will have to agree to disagree. I am sure the established legal and banking systems will continue to work without your guidance on MSE. 

You do know that if you have loads of debts, and try to get out of paying them by saying you can't afford to isn't a criminal offence. Any legal follow ups would be a civil issue. 

Not all wrong doings are illegal. They're just immoral. 

Susan1942

I am wondering if anyone can give me any advice here.  It is my intention to renew my lounge, dining room, and hall carpet.  I also intend to by two new sofa's and new curtains. I also want to have the hall redecorated.
I am wondering whether it is best to take the money from a S&S Isa or to use money I have in my current account.  I reckon it will cost around £14,000 or so maybe a bit more.  I have got well over this in my current account.  However with the way things are going for investments I am wondering if  the ISA might be the sensible choice.   I would appreciate views on this  Thank you Sue