First Steps to Solvency

alt80

Day 181, tomorrow will be 26 weeks. 

No spend day and wife put the outdoor lights up today so have started our Christmas. Son wasn't expecting to see the lights so he is very happy with that. Picking a wreath up tomorrow which my wife doesn't know about from florist but think she'll really like it and started the advent cal.

December is actually shaping up to be a fairly cheap month, the plans we have are either already paid for or not particularly expensive and we won't be doing a lot over the festive period apart from having the family over. I have said those days I am not working I don't really want to do too much few dog walks etc but just have some quiet time. No plans NYE, we are going to stay at home, watch a few films and drink sparking tea rather than Champagne lol. Nice to have already planned a few things out, definitely leaves me less anxious. 

Watched an amazing video for recovery, actually been into my old home office today. Bit of a realisation it would be stupid in a lot of ways to be seriously looking to move rn, running away from home effectively lol. Some of it is wondering if I'd have picked my current home had I been in recovery at the point I bought the place. Wife would have ideally moved somewhere more semi rural and son would have gone to a village school rather than being privately educated which is going to cost a lot over the years. At the point now that I don't begrudge it, he loves it there and tbh I'm quite proud of the fact I can provide him with a really good start in life. There was a drive to stay in the local area because of my addiction which over these past few months has kept reminding me tbh making me feel awful but today thinking about plans for the coming month and being based where we are works really well, close to work/ school etc still love the immediate area tbf and my home. Possibly won't stay forever but running away and spending money on something I'm not even sure I want to buy is just being chained to my addiction in another way. 

@uralmaid thank you - when you say busy are we talking can't park up type busy? Our forecast in NG for Saturday is rain and Sunday is pleasant but cold. We are going to see what the weather is like but may have a drive over Saturday, if not wife thinks it might be nice to have a weekend away for my birthday in middle of November next year, stay in a little cottage in the middle of nowhere and have a drive up to see the seals. Either way thank you and also thanks @Grumpelstiltskin

Dogs not being allowed makes more sense; it says on the website the seals carry dangerous diseases, did make me wonder how close and how dangerous they actually are? 

@Andyjflet thanks mate, hope you're getting along well too? I actually have the drinkaware app haven't used it for a while though as I track with the alcohol free thread on here. I don't set hard targets anymore but add a +1 each day. I have a tentative goal to not drink for the whole of December but I can't face making it a target on the alcohol free thread or even in an app tbh I don't want to one day decide I'm having a drink, have a drink and then have to admit I had a drink when I said I wouldn't. Would rather take the one day at a time approach rn. See if I get through dry January too this time fml bad memories of falling off the wagon last time.

mark55man

alt80 said:

Day 180

ONE HUNDRED ANNNNNNND EIIIGHHTTTTY (sorry)

RelievedSheff

Some of the seals come quite close to the fence. If you don't try to touch them you will be fine. 

It's an amazing sight to see.

alt80

@mark55man haha fml that made me smile and brought some memories back lol.

@RelievedSheff I reckon I can manage that, pretty sure they have teeth so probably not the best idea to try to touch them. Always remember going to the zoo with my parents as a kid and every other !!!!!! sentence was 'they'll have your arm off' sister and I were laughing amongst ourselves thinking they are killjoys. Now I can almost hear myself saying it to my son fml.

warby68

My family's saying was 'look with your eyes not your hands'.

I've said it plenty of times too by now along with 'you have 2 ears but only 1 mouth for a reason'

alt80

@warby68 lol my parents said look with your eyes too. My mum and dad had some absolute !!!!!! gems; every northern parenting phrase there is my parents said at some point. Although they left the north young I think they brought the north with them lol at the time it was 100% mortifying to my sister and I growing up but we laugh about it a lot these days. 

uralmaid

It does get very busy.  There have been times in the last few years when cars were queuing along the main road for quite a while just to turn off onto the road which leads to Donna Nook. The local council has been altering the roads but we haven't been up there since then.  Right at the top there is a small car park but they changed that into disabled parking.  Everyone else now seems to have to park in the farmers field. It does usually get busy.  It is now one road in and one road out I think.  The seals are gorgeous though and well worth taking your son to see them. Some of the seal pups are right up against the fence. People come from all over the country to see them.

alt80

Day 182, 26 weeks making six months free today. Also 30 days since I had a drink and have to say I don’t miss it. Would love to be saying I’m on target for sub £20k balance on the cards but I don’t think it’s going to quite get there tbh.

@uralmaid thank you for the heads up.

RelievedSheff

Congratulations on making it to 6 months. 

There were times I really didn't think you would get there, but here we are and you have made a proper go of it this time.

Well done for sticking with it and for making the absolutely massive changes to not just your life but that of your wife, son and families as well.

In some ways the balances are irrelevant. The other changes you have put in place are of far greater importance and the balances will follow on with your vastly reduced spending.

Your complete change of mindset should be an inspiration to many just starting out on their road to debt freedom  

rugbymadfamily

Fantastic! Congratulations! So very pleased for you! Hope you have some nice plans for the weekend to relax and celebrate the progress :-)