First Steps to Solvency

alt80

Day 2 

Got up a bit late 9am. Was awake before listening to classic fm in bed lol.

Took my son for an early Maccys lunch. Did eat a Big Mac ordered it on its own, no chips. Wife needs to get me back on the chicken salad diet lol still 1kg heavier than when I went to the rehab. Son had his happy meal and a McFlurry. Know I need to take him to healthier places but he loves going through the drive thru and generally doesn’t eat a lot of junk.

@RelievedSheff thanks mate. I really hope I can get there with it. I don’t want to live my life in the way I have been doing recovery is so !!!!!! hard though. Worked at things don’t get me wrong but most things have come quite easy to me. This def doesn’t. Need it though.

@warby68 yeah that’s what I’m thinking leave this behind and start another. Had a brief look at the finances over the past week fml nothing in plan total !!!!!! mess tbh I’ve spent more than that £295. I keep doing this to myself and the 5 years turns into 8 or whatever. Was working well when I was doing the accountability on here putting my spends up good or bad. Made me think about it and I’ve still got all the ideas for days out with my family. Really want to do some of those. 

@PestoPasta I’ve started the meetings.

Yeah I want to do the family walks, dinners etc. Sounds stupid but it tripped me off the weather being so bad having to cancel our meal out and son not really being that welcoming. I had been told but I’d def built the return home up in my head when it wasn’t what I’d wanted I turned to the stupid stuff again. Know I keep doing it I’m going to destroy myself and my family. I don’t want my son to grow up with that heartache. 

@theoretica ha that’s the principle I need to work to mate - not worth feeling ill for. Glad it’s going well for you and yeah I completely relate to the now wanting to make a fuss when out I’m not drinking and tbh dreading going to a restaurant and not ordering a bottle of wine that feeling of it’s just what you do but I need to just stay off it for a bit in my head the waiters thinking I’m probably an alcoholic or something if I don’t order a drink. Tbh just need to not give a !!!!!! what other people think. We're away for a few days next week just try to enjoy the time with my wife rather than focusing on some waiter wondering if I have a problem with alcohol or not.

Grumpelstiltskin

Alt Pleased you went to McDonalds.
Looking at your post on Sheff's thread let me say this you are never too old for a bit of seaside tat.
Put Skeggy and Mablethorpe on your day out list for when the weather is better and for much later in the year Donna Nook and the seals
Donna Nook | Lincolnshire Wildlife Trust (lincstrust.org.uk)

Legs21

Don’t worry about not having a drink in the restaurant. Waiter would think nothing of it or that you’re driving.

enthusiasticsaver

It looks like you have had a few down days since coming out but good to see you sounding more level today.  Whilst I get that you are constantly aiming to be "the best in business" or a "perfect family man" you are just human like the  rest of us and will make mistakes.  The thing is to learn from them and move on.  Life is too short for regrets. 

I think the diary has helped you in recording spends and acknowledging them to yourself as well as to us on here.  Over recent months the diary seems to have encompassed other things like your family relationships and your addiction struggles but other diaries also do this.  They are an honest record of whatever you choose to use it for.  The fact you still have a lot of comments on there indicate there are many of us that are trying to help and although some of the comments are harsh sometimes I think they are made with the best of intentions.  Only you can say whether this diary helps you or not and if it does not then you should ask for it to be closed.  Or you could turn over a new page and open a new one to keep your personal finances on track and either include or don't include your addiction struggles.  I personally feel you should embrace the group therapy the pros have offered you and you may well see that there are many others like you, professional family men or women who are battling demons rather than some preconceived idea of what a junkie looks like. 

downshifted

Why do you care what a waiter or anyone else thinks about the drinks you do or don’t order? My husband has stopped drinking alcohol because he’s on 18 tablets a day following his cardiac arrest but he doesn’t explain himself to anyone. He currently can’t drive for the same reason, so I can’t drink when out either as I’m always the driver. No one cares one way or the other, and so what if they did! 

Sun_Addict

I’m glad you’re sounding in a better frame of mind than the other night. We all want to see you come through this and start enjoying life. It’s going to take time and effort but you can do it. You need to stop worrying about what other people think just concentrate on what’s right for you and your family. No one will bat an eyelid if you don’t order alcohol. 

dawnybabes

You care too much about what people think looking in.  No one really cares if you drink or don’t. 

alt80

Day 3.

Thanks for Donna Nook suggestion my son would love that def one of the reasons I’m still here haha. True re having a drink thanks. 👍

I can’t really face recording my spends really right now putting down everything in black and white usually helps but I’ve had a few fairly large spending binges which I’m not exactly proud of. Does tend to stop me from spending being disciplined re writing it down/ planning etc though so I do need to get back to it. 

Son has gone to play with his cousins this morning so wife and I have been doing a few jobs around the house. Woke up to the radio again and had a bit of a fry up. Tomorrow I’m getting back on the chicken salad !!!!!! the weight off.

Read some article about some bloke with 9 kids, a few businesses and been bankrupt. Seemed like a bit of a !!!!!! tbh but did make me think (9 kids aside 😆) I don’t want to be judged like that and I never want to be in the position of what he claims was practically being homeless and not being able to put food on the table. I saw similarities because it seems he likes his cars too similar marques but not very nice examples haha. Made me think I don’t want to wind up at 50 with everyone and his dog chasing me for money. A !!!!!! looking 15 year old Conti GTC and the worlds ugliest house which is probably rented. 

PestoPasta

Well done on Day 3. Just keep things simple and keep with the group therapy. 

RelievedSheff

You sound much more level headed today

Just take it one day at a time. The finances will still be there when you are ready to face them.

Have a nice day with your wife and don't have too much chicken salad next week 🤣🤣🤣