First Steps to Solvency

Four_Seasons

Lovely to hear from you. Keep going you are doing so well, sending positive thoughts.
               FS. 

CRANKY40

Don't bother with the Tesla. I drove behind one for about 10 miles and it's brake lights were flashing more than the lights on my Christmas tree ha ha. Yoga is good though, it helps you to relax. Glad you're ok and Mrs alt is doing good. You've done well with the people that you've chosen to work for you too. You sound so much better and that makes me (and probably a lot of other folk on here) happy. 

@Grumpelstiltskin my sunflowers are also a bit iffy. I'm never sure if I'm drowing them or underwatering them. None of my courgette seeds have germinated either, not even the ones called "Sure Thing"  😂

Legs21

Great to hear from you. You’re sounding more sensible each time you post. You’ll be back home before you know it and nice to know that you can step back from the business a bit to concentrate on you getting better. Good for the wife to have a go at managing the spends whilst you’re not there too. May be the wake up call she needed to understand the cost/value of things. 

It maybe tough being away from family and business but I’m sure you’ll look back at this time and really appreciate how much you needed it to reset your mind and well-being. 

RelievedSheff

Nice to hear from you Alt. And nice to see you are in a better frame of mind.

A bit of extra debt will be worth it in the long run. You're not alone with the extra debt this month. Mine will be going £20k up shortly,  well hopefully 😕

maddiemay

Loving your positive updates, both you and Mrs alt80 are doing great and setting in place the foundations for a great life together with your son. Cheering you on as always.

ladyholly

Glad to hear things are going well. Very proud of you for facing up to your problems (good grief I sound like your Mother . Never an easy thing to do though.

maggiem

Great to hear from you. I am constantly surprised by the massive differences in your posts - so calm and rational in yesterday's post. Well done Mrs Alt and work colleagues too. I've read in your posts such a lot about how awful you think you are. I just can't believe that your work colleagues would have stayed with a terrible boss. Please recognise your strengths. 

alt80

Might sound a lot better and in someways I am but its not easy at all tbh I think the mindset I’m in is always going to be there just need to keep it in check not let things get so destructive. 

Been thinking about my personal finances a fair bit today - if someone told me when I started I’d earn practically £100k/a net 100% I’d have thought I’d arrived not be still swimming in debt to Land Rover lol. Some things don’t change I suppose ha. Wouldn’t have believed I’d have been worse for the coke than ever at 40 either fml. Long conversation with my wife she has demons too trying to look like women 10 years younger on IG, it’s !!!!!! ridiculous really. Lot of things people have said on here has made me reassess as well as the pros - I don’t want my son growing up thinking his only worth is the amount of money he can pull in it’s !!!!!! torture and always someone bigger in the business, climbing the levels never stops. Get to the next one and feel !!!!!! you’re not two further on. I’ll tell you now whatever amount is never enough - there’s always someone better in the game if you’re just an average bloke and at the age I’m at now there’s a lot that are younger too. Head says I should be better, be able to compete with the big boys not be some big fish in a goldfish bowl or whatever. Had chance to do a lot of thinking and I like my business the way it is tbh; working on the slow, sustainable growth. I’m not after becoming some massive corporate and start losing touch with the job/ staff on the ‘coal face’/ whatever. Taken a lot for me to admit that because the other side of my head says I’m a failure for that not being the direction I want to go, need to aim bigger, make a success of my life etc. Told my wife I’m probably not going to get that much bigger in business and don’t really want to - I was ready for her telling me that was it and she was off to find some bloke who could give her everything but she didn’t.

Right now I’d would rather work on being the best I can be for the staff I have and provide the best service to my clients stick with where I am, build on it slowly but work on the mindset rather than winding up at 50 a bit bigger in business with lot more debt and still turning to spending on stupid stuff and cocaine to alleviate feeling like !!!!!! because there’s some other bloke bigger in the business fml I’m done with that at the point I’d rather take my dog for a walk than keep living like that.

foxgloves

Hello alt80,
There's a lot of sense in what you say. Your mindset re money, coking it, material possessions, etc, hasn't appeared overnight & it won't disappear instantly either. It will probably be something you always need to work on, but will get easier as you go along. I used to know someone many years ago who was high up in his game, nice period house in a decent part of the city, kids at private schools, you name it. He ended up reposessed & living on a council estate because he was so busy being 'the best', the drinking & spending got completely out of control. Then come the poor decisions & bankruptcy. I think you make a really good point about wanting to make your business the best it can be, because 'best' definitely doesn't always equal 'biggest'. Better to my mind to be the owner of a business which gives you a generous monthly income than one which rakes in more money but you pay for that with your health, sanity, relationships & self-respect.
Stay with it & you'll get there.
F
P. S Off for a walk tomorrow but sadly it's been too dry to see any cars up to their doors in water (you know where I mean), lol. 

Kakiste

Glad that you're reflecting on unhealthy mindsets. It won't matter to your family how much you earned. It's quality of time rather than quantity of money that matters to kids. 

I think the 'city' mindset is incredibly damaging. There are a few people i've known from uni who were doing brilliantly in business for the last 10-15 years but over the last few years (and into their late 30s/early 40s most of them have crashed out and needed either rehab or bankruptcy to sort their lives out. 

I hope rehab goes well for you.