First Steps to Solvency

getmore4less

I find I get sleepy with TV but as soon as the phone or monitor that has me awake.
I need to try the reading setting on my phone that reduces the blues and can add paper textures to make feel more like a book. 

Onebrokelady

Hi,I have recommendations for your sleep problem,I have to clarify by saying I have not tried either of these but they come highly recommended from a reliable source. First read the book Why We Sleep by Mathew Walker, I suspect this would help you a lot with your health anxiety and how you are not doing yourself any favours by avoiding sleep, then check out Bublox Glasses ,these are special glasses you can wear in the evening to counteract the blue light from electrical gadgets, I think you can get Day time ones as well for if you spend a lot of time on computers, they aren't cheap by my standards but I suspect easily affordable for someone with your budget, I listen to a podcast by Dr Rangan  Chattergee that you would also find useful,it's called Feel Great Live More and it's not just about sleep it's about optimising your health so you get the best use out of your body, he sometimes has a discount code for the Blublox glasses 
Do you do good quality things while you are resisting sleep or are you just wasting time, if you are just wasting time because you don't want to be sleeping then you are not using your time very efficiently. You would get much more done of a better quality if you went to bed when tired and got up earlier, try just going to bed for a week when your body tells you to and see if it improves anything, your body has been used to being over stimulated and it will take a while for it to re set itself, this can take months so it's not really been long enough
I don't sleep well due to health problems that keep me awake so I know how rubbish it can make you feel,I am learning to listen to my body. I have resisted sleep in the past but I'm learning to just go with it now. My sleep pattern ranges from 4 to 6 hours a night most nights with a few days of 11 hours chucked in ( normally if I've done a long day at work or am ill ) then every few months I won't be able to sleep for 24 hours and I mean I will be fully awake go to work and carry on feeling as if I've had the best sleep ever, then I seem to reset and go back to my normal pattern of 4 to 6 hours 

enthusiasticsaver

I am a deep sleeper and go to bed anytime between 11pm and 12pm normally and wake at 7am practically on the dot. Usually I drop off almost as soon as my head touches the pillow much to my husbands annoyance as he is a poor and very light sleeper but when I have had sleep issues in the past they were usually connected with stress. We all need good quality to sleep to function well so certainly not wasted time. You seem to suffer with anxiety so I would guess this is one reason behind your poor sleep. 

 I think exercise every day helps with sleep and a regular bedtime routine. I do sometimes go on the iPad at bedtime but prefer a book or my kindle. No caffeine after 6pm. Learning to relax would help you a lot. 

getmore4less

Have you sorted out your eating,  breakfast, a decent lunch break no 5 mins grabbing something, and evening meal

alt80

Going to be a late one this evening I think still got a fair bit to do on my list and the personal finances no idea whether I'll get that done today. Also need to make my mind up about booking the Greece trip - feel like I need to but conscious possibly wasting time/ money so idk. Family will go !!!!!! mad if I don't bother then can't get the flights later. 

Wife confirmed 3 girls for nails first week back after all the stupid fuss about doing it lol. Told her if she's willing to do 3, should do the 5. Expects to keep the cash though tbh !!!!!! annoys me not like I've just bought what the !!!!!! I want with my earnings without any regard for paying my mortgage and other bills. Idk maybe being unfair.

Thanks re sleep will have a look I do struggle with it, always have generally. Half issue pushing through switching my brain off hate the downtime. @RelievedSheff haha probably only time you'll ever sound like my wife ha exactly what she says there lol.  @Onebrokelady that why we sleep book probably going to tell me I should be dead already lol will have a look find stuff like that quite interesting irony will be me staying up to read it probably ha. Will have a look at the other stuff too thanks. 

@getmore4less I set the night mode on all my devices. Didn't know about the paper effects though. Eating so-so cba with lunch today and a load of coffee so not been great. Can do it when I get the wife on it tell her what time to feed me and she's set the table up etc. Sometimes she likes me to help her usually hide in the office ha.

getmore4less

I think getting more regular on meals will help as it sets routine for other activities to happen around.

Given you have pretty much admitted you are not productive doing late evening work just inventing stuff and repeatedly  going over stuff you can't  fix  better getting some sleep and doing more morning time.
Have a regular breakfast time to stop if you start too early.

Deal with son going to school time even eat together might be a good routine.

I am not too concerned about flights yet, as things open more flights will get put on.
If nothing jumps out from the wife research give it another week.

alt80

Realised I've done !!!!!! all for the weekend planning this week emailed wife for suggestions, she can do some work on it for a change.

@getmore4less thanks mate probably right re meals/ food. Wife always feeds son same time each day too early for me 5pm lol. She shifts that to 7pm and I'd come off the work for then but just get the 'too late' chat. Losing all !!!!!! control over her ha.

True re late at night work often playing catch up when I've been up all night and not really functioning in the morning tbh even keeping off the stuff if I'm up past about 1am I'm !!!!!! the next morning. Days I manage the early get ups without the alarms etc absolutely on fire productivity wise can't get close to that everyday though. 

Will have a look this weekend tbf to her she's done a lot on it decent sheet actually - probably result of no IG, more focused haha. 

@enthusiasticsaver wife gets me doing the exercise first thing in the morning, late at night it's properly worn off. 

enthusiasticsaver

If your wife is making an effort to keep off IG and get some nails bookings then maybe you could make an effort to eat with her and your son at least once or twice during the week?  I get you with the 5pm dinner but my DD and her husband feed their daughters at that time too as young children just get grouchy if they are hungry and tired at the same time.  

As you  haven't budgeted for nail income I would let your wife keep that towards personal spends as an incentive to do more and to stop her breaking your budget.  I know you don't have a lot of personal spends money but your RR is still taking a chunk of money and at some point in the future you may want a weekend car so keeping her onside may pay dividends.  

alt80

@enthusiasticsaver yeah just being miserable generally idk.

alt80

Up past midnight again thinking about upcoming portfolio refinance looking like I can get the 75%LTV going to eat into the sinking fund a bit more than I hoped but it’s not the end of the world. Keeping 2 in block and thinking I need to back off adding BTL units for a while stay at the 75LTV, get all sinking fund back and unwind it a bit over the coming years, get to point of no PG needed. Feels like going backwards to come forwards a bit tbh know it isn’t just like adding units seeing the numbers go up know when its maxed on LTV portfolio value nothing but vanity really lol. Also prices gen sky high right now so don’t want to be adding units just for the sake of it. Seen no more decent flip projects either, been to view a few but not enough across them to make it worth my time. One of those things.

I’m really not sure how to switch off at night and tbh don’t think it does me any favours being like this. Shared a bottle of wine this evening with the wife felt like sinking a lot more tbh haven’t had too much more but sometimes getting absolutely !!!!!! drinking all I can do to switch my brain off for a bit. Nothing done on personal finances idk should have thinking about getting it done now but need to sleep really. Been odd being on here realised my sleeping patterns aren’t normal more issues with my head. Probably should get back on the chill app download it again.

Tbh felt like giving up today had the spending demons a bit generally this week. Not strong enough to not resist fortunately but also had the self worth issues today not feeling good enough because I’m not in a position to buy the AM I was looking at. First world problems I know makes me feel even worse about myself knowing this stuff affects me tbh. Also been thinking about the other stuff a bit too much. Finding family life hard idk why actually really treasure the time we have spent together this last year. Look through pics of times I’ve spent with my son especially the day we spent together before lockdown 2. Generally make me smile today all I can think is I don’t deserve those times. Wish I could sort my head out for good go to sleep at night, wake up ‘refreshed and raring to go’ FML thought that was some kind of myth anyone could feel good most mornings ha. Def want to earn better in the future but have parked that for next few years build retained and sustain growth first, my head telling me I’m doing good better than a long time but still a little bit of my head dragging me back down into the !!!!!! abyss. Married to a woman who hates me sees no real way out though I love her to bits she could go and !!!!!! my mate senseless and I’d still have her back no !!!!!! wonder I’ve got no sense of self worth ha.

Weekend tomorrow expected to do right thing all I want to do go to office stay there for weekend don’t even care if I do no work. Just want to give up have a full weekender no sleep absolutely !!!!!! wired. Not going to.