Adult 'Babies'

missbishi

And there was me thinking this was going to be a thread about High Court judges and Conservative MPs who pay good money to a woman who calls herself 'Nanny Josephine' whilst they lie on their backs in oversized nappies. 

Mojisola

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy

It would be worth looking for some help so that you accept your own worth and know it's right to stand your ground.

There's plenty of free on-line stuff or you could find a therapist to talk things through.

sweetsand

Mojisola said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy as I give in when they start being 'nice' which is usually when they need a lift etc.

Tell them in advance, it's not how they behave when they want something that's important but how they behave the rest of the time - unless that improves, it doesn't matter how nice they can be towards you when they want a lift somewhere.

She's already done that and it will carry on and on if she takes that route again.

Only if she continues to give in.

If their behaviour hasn't been acceptable, the next time they need a favour, the answer is no, no matter how nice they've been just before asking.

To be frank they have clearly passed that stage years ago. 

Vikipollard

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy as I give in when they start being 'nice' which is usually when they need a lift etc.

Tell them in advance, it's not how they behave when they want something that's important but how they behave the rest of the time - unless that improves, it doesn't matter how nice they can be towards you when they want a lift somewhere.

She's already done that and it will carry on and on if she takes that route again.

Only if she continues to give in.

If their behaviour hasn't been acceptable, the next time they need a favour, the answer is no, no matter how nice they've been just before asking.

To be frank they have clearly passed that stage years ago. 

I disagree - it would appear that the OP has not challenged (with any real teeth) before.  This has to be the "my house, my rules" conversation with "you behave all the time, or there's the door".  Mojisola is right; they need to understand that being nice for five minutes to get your own way, then reverting to being an inconsiderate slob isn't happening anymore.  Shock therapy - but you have to both mean it and act on it.

onwards&upwards

missbishi said:

And there was me thinking this was going to be a thread about High Court judges and Conservative MPs who pay good money to a woman who calls herself 'Nanny Josephine' whilst they lie on their backs in oversized nappies. 

Glad I'm not the only one who's brain went there! 

sweetsand

Vikipollard said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy as I give in when they start being 'nice' which is usually when they need a lift etc.

Tell them in advance, it's not how they behave when they want something that's important but how they behave the rest of the time - unless that improves, it doesn't matter how nice they can be towards you when they want a lift somewhere.

She's already done that and it will carry on and on if she takes that route again.

Only if she continues to give in.

If their behaviour hasn't been acceptable, the next time they need a favour, the answer is no, no matter how nice they've been just before asking.

To be frank they have clearly passed that stage years ago. 

I disagree - it would appear that the OP has not challenged (with any real teeth) before.  This has to be the "my house, my rules" conversation with "you behave all the time, or there's the door".  Mojisola is right; they need to understand that being nice for five minutes to get your own way, then reverting to being an inconsiderate slob isn't happening anymore.  Shock therapy - but you have to both mean it and act on it.

I won't rebuke you for disagreeing with me however wrong your opinions may be. Look at the facts, they are not really "babies" re they. Therefore, surely, the convos have taken place re idle threats. Shape up or ship out and don't bother coming back for handouts, faux promises. I've seen via work meany leacehs like that in slightly different scenarios where children, grandchildren leach of parents/grandparents - time to put your foot down and mean it.

Vikipollard

sweetsand said:

Vikipollard said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy as I give in when they start being 'nice' which is usually when they need a lift etc.

Tell them in advance, it's not how they behave when they want something that's important but how they behave the rest of the time - unless that improves, it doesn't matter how nice they can be towards you when they want a lift somewhere.

She's already done that and it will carry on and on if she takes that route again.

Only if she continues to give in.

If their behaviour hasn't been acceptable, the next time they need a favour, the answer is no, no matter how nice they've been just before asking.

To be frank they have clearly passed that stage years ago. 

I disagree - it would appear that the OP has not challenged (with any real teeth) before.  This has to be the "my house, my rules" conversation with "you behave all the time, or there's the door".  Mojisola is right; they need to understand that being nice for five minutes to get your own way, then reverting to being an inconsiderate slob isn't happening anymore.  Shock therapy - but you have to both mean it and act on it.

I won't rebuke you for disagreeing with me however wrong your opinions may be. Look at the facts, they are not really "babies" re they. Therefore, surely, the convos have taken place re idle threats. Shape up or ship out and don't bother coming back for handouts, faux promises. I've seen via work meany leacehs like that in slightly different scenarios where children, grandchildren leach of parents/grandparents - time to put your foot down and mean it.

Which is exactly what I said, so not sure why you believe my opinions are wrong.  Whatever.

sweetsand

Vikipollard said:

sweetsand said:

Vikipollard said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

sweetsand said:

Mojisola said:

pressurecooker said:

I'm my own worst enemy as I give in when they start being 'nice' which is usually when they need a lift etc.

Tell them in advance, it's not how they behave when they want something that's important but how they behave the rest of the time - unless that improves, it doesn't matter how nice they can be towards you when they want a lift somewhere.

She's already done that and it will carry on and on if she takes that route again.

Only if she continues to give in.

If their behaviour hasn't been acceptable, the next time they need a favour, the answer is no, no matter how nice they've been just before asking.

To be frank they have clearly passed that stage years ago. 

I disagree - it would appear that the OP has not challenged (with any real teeth) before.  This has to be the "my house, my rules" conversation with "you behave all the time, or there's the door".  Mojisola is right; they need to understand that being nice for five minutes to get your own way, then reverting to being an inconsiderate slob isn't happening anymore.  Shock therapy - but you have to both mean it and act on it.

I won't rebuke you for disagreeing with me however wrong your opinions may be. Look at the facts, they are not really "babies" re they. Therefore, surely, the convos have taken place re idle threats. Shape up or ship out and don't bother coming back for handouts, faux promises. I've seen via work meany leacehs like that in slightly different scenarios where children, grandchildren leach of parents/grandparents - time to put your foot down and mean it.

Which is exactly what I said, so not sure why you believe my opinions are wrong.  Whatever.

If you had said that which you had not then I would not have said what I said. May be in your mind you tried to say that but then read my post and thought you had said that. Anyway, at least we are both on the same road. Take care and I did not mean to upset you or anything like that.
x

thorsoak

pressurecooker - set a date for sitting them both down (this next week) give them the ultimatum - and please let us know how they take it - we can keep you strong in your demands! x

sweetsand

thorsoak said:

pressurecooker - set a date for sitting them both down (this next week) give them the ultimatum - and please let us know how they take it - we can keep you strong in your demands! x

why not now, today - this business of tomorrow, tomorrow makes me cringe. If something needs to be done, do it now!