Who should inherit my house?

Hamilton24

princeofpounds said:

I can see this both ways. You are a 'partner', but what that means is that you are boyfriend and girlfriend who have bought a property together as tenants-in-common.

Any further commitment is entirely at the discretion of both of you - you are not married or civil partners, you have no dependants. He can choose to leave his money to you, his parents, or the local cats home.

Whilst I could make disparaging comments about his commitment level in refusing to make you a beneficiary of his will, I have no idea about your relationship, and I can also imagine situations where I would want to do the same as him. One example might be if I had nieces and nephews struggling to make ends meet, whilst your only relative was a rich father who could back up your lifestyle and would inherit if you too passed on in turn before he did. 

OK, that's a rather contorted example, but I only make it to show that we should not rush to decisive judgement when we know so little about the two of you. 

Thank you - I appreciate that. As you say, we are boyfriend and girlfriend rather than being engaged or married. He is also clear that if/when we get married the situation would change and I would be left his share of the house. I don’t doubt his commitment to me at all - he is simply struggling with what to do with a well-meaning but controlling parent.

Hamilton24

Hamilton24 said:

princeofpounds said:

I can see this both ways. You are a 'partner', but what that means is that you are boyfriend and girlfriend who have bought a property together as tenants-in-common.

Any further commitment is entirely at the discretion of both of you - you are not married or civil partners, you have no dependants. He can choose to leave his money to you, his parents, or the local cats home.

Whilst I could make disparaging comments about his commitment level in refusing to make you a beneficiary of his will, I have no idea about your relationship, and I can also imagine situations where I would want to do the same as him. One example might be if I had nieces and nephews struggling to make ends meet, whilst your only relative was a rich father who could back up your lifestyle and would inherit if you too passed on in turn before he did. 

OK, that's a rather contorted example, but I only make it to show that we should not rush to decisive judgement when we know so little about the two of you. 

Thank you - I appreciate that. As you say, we are boyfriend and girlfriend rather than being engaged or married. He is also clear that if/when we get married the situation would change and I would be left his share of the house. I don’t doubt his commitment to me at all - he is simply struggling with what to do with a well-meaning but controlling parent.

I should add that my parents (who are living in a lovely house mortgage-free but without the spare money that his family have) have absolutely no interest in his share or even my share of the house and are baffled why we don’t just leave the shares to each automatically.

elsien

I suppose the question he could ask himself is, if anything does happen to him then at that point whose need will be greater? In the majority of cases, that'd be you. 

Hamilton24

elsien said:

I suppose the question he could ask himself is, if anything does happen to him then at that point whose need will be greater? In the majority of cases, that'd be you. 

Given his parents own several properties and I only have my share in this one property, that would absolutely be me! I like this argument!

ElephantBoy57

Hamilton24 said:

Totally agree with all of this! He seems to be worried that his dad will cut him off (financially and emotionally) if he leaves his share of the house to me rather than them and doesn’t want to lose his relationship with his dad. He seems to feel that the money belongs in his family so his parents would be annoyed if I ended up with it.

I have an older sister and brother, it hasn't crossed my mind to include them in my will.

AdrianC

Hamilton24 said:

AdrianC said:

Hamilton24 said:

(this money was inheritance from his grandfather but given to him early so he could buy the flat)

I'm not quite sure what this bit means - could you clarify?

It's only an "early inheritance" if his grandfather's still alive.

Or was it left in a trust until he reached a certain age?

Sorry - I’m probably wording it badly! The money was left to his father by his grandfather when his grandfather died but his dad would be leaving the money to my partner anyway upon his (the dad’s) death so gave him the money early (after the grandfather died but before the dad died) so he could use it to buy his flat.

Ah, so it's just a gift from the father.

Hamilton24

AdrianC said:

Hamilton24 said:

AdrianC said:

Hamilton24 said:

(this money was inheritance from his grandfather but given to him early so he could buy the flat)

I'm not quite sure what this bit means - could you clarify?

It's only an "early inheritance" if his grandfather's still alive.

Or was it left in a trust until he reached a certain age?

Sorry - I’m probably wording it badly! The money was left to his father by his grandfather when his grandfather died but his dad would be leaving the money to my partner anyway upon his (the dad’s) death so gave him the money early (after the grandfather died but before the dad died) so he could use it to buy his flat.

Ah, so it's just a gift from the father.

Yes, it’s just a gift. 

greatcrested

Hamilton24 said:

AdrianC said:

Hamilton24 said:

AdrianC said:

Hamilton24 said:

(this money was inheritance from his grandfather but given to him early so he could buy the flat)

I'm not quite sure what this bit means - could you clarify?

It's only an "early inheritance" if his grandfather's still alive.

Or was it left in a trust until he reached a certain age?

Sorry - I’m probably wording it badly! The money was left to his father by his grandfather when his grandfather died but his dad would be leaving the money to my partner anyway upon his (the dad’s) death so gave him the money early (after the grandfather died but before the dad died) so he could use it to buy his flat.

Ah, so it's just a gift from the father.

Yes, it’s just a gift. 

No, it's a gift with emotional strings...

getmore4less

Hamilton24 said:

The declaration of trust means he has 70% and I have 30% so that if we were to break up, we’d evenly split what we paid off the mortgage (we’re paying the mortgage off 50/50) and then divide the rest of the profits 70/30 but that’s only if we were to break up and then sell the house. We pay the mortgage 50/50 and we pay all house expenses, furniture etc. 50/50. I’d just assumed (stupidly it seems!) that if anything were to happen to either one of us we’d leave the house to the other. We are tenants in common as we’re not married but have a joint mortgage etc. I certainly had planned to leave my share of the house to my partner and still intend to do so.

Joint or TIC only really matters for survivorship, you can still have a trust deed with joint tenants that specifies beneficial ownership that creates a debt to  the estate when you die

Back to the trust deed this looks like another one  that has got it wrong for equity shares.

Without real number I can only use an example.

Only getting back what you have paid off the mortgage is the first thing that is wrong  that mortgage bought a share of the house you should get back that share less the share of the outstanding mortgage.

Say the mortgage was 50%(25% each) of the total and the house price doubled you would only get back the original mortgage amount which is now 12.5% you should still get 25%
The other bit looks like you had 30% of the deposit he had 70%.

eg. lets go with £200k house £100k mortgage £70k him £30k you
You should own £80k and him £120k at the start  that's 40% 60% 
house double paid off the mortgage  you should get £160k he gets £240k
with your agreement you get £140k £260k

if the deposit £50k mortgage was £150k you should own £75k+£15k=£90k worth 45% him 55%
double mortgage paid off you should get  £180k  agreement you get £150k

bouicca21

I suspect the parents regard that ‘gift’ as family money.  OP is not regarded as family.