School v countryside

iksbedd

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Just re-read the first post: we moved here from a town in Surrey. Our access to green space is just as good, if not better. I think I'd now find Surrey stifling ... too parochial.

Exactly this.

oystercatcher

Much as I wanted to live in the countryside we decided to live on the edge of a small town so the children had access to school, clubs and social life. We have access to big cities by train, everything we need for everyday life is available in the local town but we can still walk the dogs in farmland without even using the car. The children when small could ramble and make dens in the woods but also could visit friends and go to Scouts, Air Cadets and all the usual kids stuff. I think this could have been difficult if we had been living very rural and remotely.

We were lucky enough to have good schools locally. A friend who moved away to the outskirts of a large city when her children were tiny was so unhappy with the local schools that she decided to send them to private school and eventually boarding school . Whether she would have chosen this elsewhere I don't know. We all have our own expectations of our children and of family life.

Robin9

It's not always sunnier on the other side of the hill.

I grew up in the countryside - school as an hour away by bus. Staying on foe extra clubs was not an option. There was no youth club.

Think about yourselves - no nipping down to the shops for a pint of milk, newspaper.

hazyjo

Suburbia for me. Do you remember how bored you got as a child? I do. I was always saying how bored I was. What I would do now for those long 'boring' nights and weekends lol. And that was me in Essex - not much on the doorstep but things within very easy reach. I think it does them good having things near to go to (social events, good transport links, etc). Do you want to be having to drive them everywhere?


Am sure there will be people from North Devon here saying what an idyllic wonderful childhood they had. Horses for courses.


Perhaps spend a week down there in winter (Feb school hols?) somewhere fairly remote to see what it's really like.


Personally I'd be somewhere like where I am now in Leigh on Sea. Near it all, easy commute to London if anyone needs it, but still a nice quality of life with the option of 'sea style activities' for a more outdoorsy lifestyle if they choose.

suki1964

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

As a Londoner, that's what you do!

Not all of us, I moved to deepest darkest countryside

Op, yes the country living is good BUT, there is more then schools to think about

Depending on where you are looking to move, there may be very limited or non existent public transport which means you are going to be a taxi driver for the next 12 years at least

Country living is expensive. You need cars, you may have to drive to two different towns in a week for goods and services. My nearest town is good, but my bank pulled out last year and now I have a 40mile round trip just for that

Country children need lots of stuff to make up for the fact that there is no one near by to play with. They need the bikes, the trampoline, the swings, the slides etc etc. After school activities and you need to be taxi driver as the school bus will have gone. Kids have to be up and at their pick up point in the pitch dark during the winter which will be on an unlit road.

Country kids lose a lot of school days in the winter due to the weather. If the roads are bad, the buses won't come out, and even if you can get them in under your own steam, the teachers may not have made it in So you need time of work or pay out more for a minder

Even broadband can be difficult. Sure our house was covered by BB, but speeds of less then 1/2 meg ( or whatever it is you measure speed by - basically dial up speeds )


Here children don't have the right to roam. Farmland is private property and farmers don't like kids in their fields. I had more places to walk my dog off lead in Surrey then I have here. Dogs are not allowed on beaches most of the year either

Country living is great for me and Mr S as our kids are grown up and for our grandkids, well for them it's a holiday, they aren't living it 365

Country living is DIFFERENT , not better in my opinion. Ive grown to love it but then as I said, no kids to worry about. I would hate to be spending my time off driving here , there and everywhere for the kids wants and needs. That's something you really do need to think about

peachyprice

iksbedd wrote: »

Would you move your kids to a more rural, coastal area where the secondary school is slightly below average, from built up suburbia where secondary schools are just above average?

Nope, no way. I would want my children to be placed to have the best opportunities both during and after education, somewhere they have easy access to a good job market, social life, public transport. Somewhere they're not champing at the bit to get away from once they reach adulthood.

iksbedd

Thank you for your responses – lots of food for thought.

The area we’re looking at in not that remote that we’ll be stranded – it’s 4 miles from the nearest town and secondary school, and 10 miles from the nearest big town (Barnstaple). Exeter will be around an hour away. The primary school is 4 miles away from our desired location too (there is a more local one in the village so there are kids around).

There are buses to the nearest town and I have accepted that I will need to taxi more – although where we are now in Suburbia, buses and trains aren’t that great.

I accept the point about job opportunities, as teenagers there should be ample seasonal jobs around but part of me expects them to move away for jobs anyway when they are older – that’s what people do now. I feel there will be more desire for them to return to us if they adore where they grew up and have happy childhood memories somewhere special rather than a bog-standard, average up-bringing which is the same as everyone else…. We’re trying to move away from money/financial success being the main driver, instead focusing on happiness and being part of the community.

PasturesNew

We moved from a town to the edge of a village 3 miles outside of the town when I was 10. There were no other kids to play with, so we made no friends that weren't more than a mile's walk.

Compared to those who remained where we'd lived, we lost our local mates and access to all the places we could go to with those mates: swimming, or wandering across the common, or catching fish with a net in the local stream, or climbing the big hill (and riding down it on a tray in the snow). Without your local mates to hang out with and go to places with it leads to a solitary existence.

You have to be careful your kids don't end up "dossing down the rec, with the wrong people" if there's less going on, or fewer kids to do things with.

Look at that aspect: "if my kids are 10-15 where will they be able to wander to, alone, or bike ride to - and what is the potential for them to have local mates that call round for them to play or sit in the garden with".

Towns have opportunities, there's more going on, more things to attend, stuff to potentially do. Even if there's only something once a month in the town worth wandering round (e.g. the fair comes, or there's a festival) it's better than never having anything with a group-wide focus.

Look at what local groups they might join, how far are they? Can you/they walk there? On a hot summer's day where'd they want to go swimming? Is there a river? A beach? Or do they have to listen to others at school saying where they went when they know they sat on the sofa all weekend "bored".

It's nice, so you make a picnic .... where are you having that? Is it walkable? No point fancying a picnic if there's nowhere near to have one and you have to get the car out....

iksbedd

PasturesNew wrote: »

We moved from a town to the edge of a village 3 miles outside of the town when I was 10. There were no other kids to play with, so we made no friends that weren't more than a mile's walk.

Compared to those who remained where we'd lived, we lost our local mates and access to all the places we could go to with those mates: swimming, or wandering across the common, or catching fish with a net in the local stream, or climbing the big hill (and riding down it on a tray in the snow). Without your local mates to hang out with and go to places with it leads to a solitary existence.

You have to be careful your kids don't end up "dossing down the rec, with the wrong people" if there's less going on, or fewer kids to do things with.

Look at that aspect: "if my kids are 10-15 where will they be able to wander to, alone, or bike ride to - and what is the potential for them to have local mates that call round for them to play or sit in the garden with".

Towns have opportunities, there's more going on, more things to attend, stuff to potentially do. Even if there's only something once a month in the town worth wandering round (e.g. the fair comes, or there's a festival) it's better than never having anything with a group-wide focus.

Look at what local groups they might join, how far are they? Can you/they walk there? On a hot summer's day where'd they want to go swimming? Is there a river? A beach? Or do they have to listen to others at school saying where they went when they know they sat on the sofa all weekend "bored".

It's nice, so you make a picnic .... where are you having that? Is it walkable? No point fancying a picnic if there's nowhere near to have one and you have to get the car out....

Thank you.

To be honest, where we are now, they don't have that many friends within walking distance as they don't go to the catchment school and the area, even though it is a village, is quite busy - A road running through it and we wouldn't feel it's safe for them to venture far here either.

The area we're looking at has walks to the beach, walks into the hills from the house, play park within walking distance, local village hall with activities, pub and local shop and I feel the freedom they'd have in the new village would be more than they have now.

The new house we're looking for will have a large outdoor space (something we don't have now either).

We already drive them to activities - swimming, brownies, rugby and we have to drive to collect them from after school clubs too (granted, 2 miles away rather than 4 - but can guarantee the traffic here makes it take 3 times longer)..

I don't want to ruin their lives; this is something that is meant to make it better for them - make them happier and less money/finance driven.

Savvy_Sue

iksbedd wrote: »

The primary school is 4 miles away from our desired location too (there is a more local one in the village so there are kids around).

Yes, but if the local kids are at the local school, you may need to make a lot of effort to form local friendships.

iksbedd wrote: »

To be honest, where we are now, they don't have that many friends within walking distance as they don't go to the catchment school and the area, even though it is a village, is quite busy - A road running through it and we wouldn't feel it's safe for them to venture far here either.

The area we're looking at has walks to the beach, walks into the hills from the house, play park within walking distance, local village hall with activities, pub and local shop and I feel the freedom they'd have in the new village would be more than they have now.

At 8 and 5, I wouldn't expect them to be doing much on their own ANYWHERE, rural or not. Secondary school age was my serious starting point, but even then just wandering around on their own wasn't an option, they'd be going TO a particular place FOR a particular purpose AT a particular time.