Aspergers/ASD support thread

pigpen

So far 2 of my children have dx of ASD's but I am in bit of a quandary about my 8 y/o.. I can't decide if she is just strange and bit of a winnie (the witch) I am also watching the 20 month old closely as she is showing traits already, I am hoping she is just strange

She does EVERYTHING at the speed of a dying snail.. she spends the full dinner hour at school eating, it can take hours to get dressed, she wears the same clothes over and over (they do get washed between) She rarely speaks and just looks at you when you speak to her like you are talking martian. She doesn't seem to live on the same planet as the rest of us.. even her teachers have commented on this.

She has been assessed for dyslexia and dyspraxia and 'passed' both of those but I am really not sure if she has some sort of ASD as well.

She interacts well on the whole with her siblings but hasn't any friends at school.

She has severe hypermobility which does make her more careful regarding her moving and she walks very badly and cannot walk far.

I've had a discussion with OH about her but he doesn't really have much info to base an opinion on..

I probably already know the answer to this but.. do you think it sounds like she needs a formal asd assessment or am I being a little neurotic?

ThriftyShelly

Hi Pigpen

You've nothing to lose by having a chat with the school Senco or your GP, I really started to notice similar things with my son when he was 7-8, except for the talking, as he never stops talking!
I spoke to a few people (friends, collagues etc) about what to do and some said it would help him to get a diagnosis but others said don't get him labelled, if he is healthy and happy don't worry, we are all different etc (my hubby also said this)
it came to a head when I realised he wasn't happy and he actually asked me why he was different to his friends. The school also had some concerns and after that things have moved quite quickly.
I know I haven't really given you an answer but as I say have a chat with the special educational needs co-ordinator at the school or your GP and see what they think?
Wishing you and your family well

daska

pigpen wrote: »

So far 2 of my children have dx of ASD's but I am in bit of a quandary about my 8 y/o.. I can't decide if she is just strange and bit of a winnie (the witch) I am also watching the 20 month old closely as she is showing traits already, I am hoping she is just strange

She does EVERYTHING at the speed of a dying snail.. she spends the full dinner hour at school eating, it can take hours to get dressed, she wears the same clothes over and over (they do get washed between) She rarely speaks and just looks at you when you speak to her like you are talking martian. She doesn't seem to live on the same planet as the rest of us.. even her teachers have commented on this.

She has been assessed for dyslexia and dyspraxia and 'passed' both of those but I am really not sure if she has some sort of ASD as well.

She interacts well on the whole with her siblings but hasn't any friends at school.

She has severe hypermobility which does make her more careful regarding her moving and she walks very badly and cannot walk far.

I've had a discussion with OH about her but he doesn't really have much info to base an opinion on..

I probably already know the answer to this but.. do you think it sounds like she needs a formal asd assessment or am I being a little neurotic?

Yes - whichever answer you want or both LOL. But only because I think every parent with an ASD kid gets a little neurotic about their others - the more I find out the more I see traits in virtually everyone (though mainly myself) :rotfl:

Given you have experience of 2 diagnosed kids to inform your opinion, I'd say yes, request a formal assessment. It may be ASD, it may be nothing, it may be something else entirely.

pigpen

I spoke to the SENCO.. basically she isn't interested if it means paperwork. She is a pain providing support for this daughter and the older one with cerebral palsy. This daughter is always last out of school because she waits at the top of the stairs until everyone has gone because she is scared she will get knocked down. I asked if she could be escorted down the stairs.. no chance! It is ridiculous.

I am a bit neurotic about diabetes symptoms as well since having DS3 dx 18 months ago lol... I am starting to think all parents have some behaviours out there.

It was actually amusing when we were given a questionnaire thing to do as part of a college course which was looking at behavioural issues inc ASD... I came out with a very high score for ADD (far too lazy for the H in there too )

I spoke to the school nurse re DS3 today and they have a psychologist who works with the school nurse they are getting to come speak to DS3.. since his diabetes psych left he has been left to his own devices really resulting in one nasty incident and a few smaller incidents, usually with DS2 so hopefully we can make some progress with him too.

Savvy_Sue

Heard an interesting programme tonight: It's my Story: Knowing Me, Knowing Autism. Not quite available to listen again, but will be soon ...

Savvy_Sue

And a bit in Saturday Live this morning, 14 yo doing research in astro-physics, his mum has written a book. Most memorable bit was her saying that in all the intensive therapy they tried initially, they lost him being a child, so she took him out under the stars, played some music, and danced with him.

seven-day-weekend

My son (33), has told me something about himself today that I never knew.

We were talking about a friend's daughter who has been diagnosed with Aspergers, ADHD, dyspraxia and dyslexia. I was saying how bad her writing was and asked him if he still got letters the wrong way round as he used to, he said he did sometimes when he was tired and/or stressed.

He then told me he also reads numbers the wrong way round and still does it frequently, like for example he can read 65 as 56, or 95, or 59 or 62 or 92. Turning letters backwards, upside down and out of sequence.

My husband and I never knew this about our son until today. We knew he wasn't very good at Maths,but I am not very good at Maths either. We didn't realise he could read the same number five or six different ways. He never said - well he wouldn't when he was young, would he, he would assume everyone saw them this way. It was never picked up at school (AS was not classed as a separate condition in those days, dyslexia was only just being diagnosed, dyscalculia (dyslexia with numbers) was nowhere).

My husband and I are both feeling complete failures as parents, we really feel as though we have let him down. I know there is nothing we can do now, just wanted to share with the forum.

Thank goodness all these things are tested for these days.

Thanks for listening.

Savvy_Sue

I really don't think you should feel you were complete failures. You don't know what you don't know until you find out that you didn't know it! If you knew what you didn't know, you'd ask ... :rotfl:

seven-day-weekend

You're right of course Sue and as my neighbour pointed out there would have been nothing anyone could do about it in those days either.

And our son doesn't think it's a big deal so that's the most important thing.

Don't feel a failure today, just sad that we didn't know so that perhaps we might have helped him a bit instead of him dealing with it on his own. But as my neighbour also says, that's how they learn to overcome it as well.

Oh well always interesting!

kittiej

Just a bit of a light hearted story.

My sons are in private nursery during the holidays, a girl pulled DS1s hair (he is still being assessed for ASD), anyway he screamed and pushed the girl who then fell over.

On the way home my younger son was recounting the tale and said the girl was crying, she was in bits.

To which DS1 got really annoyed and shouted no, she wasn't in bits, she was in one piece!

Oh the joys,