Bought my first house and hate it, SO much

RelievedSheff

Sarah1Mitty2 said:

lika_86 said:

WafflePancake said:

Hi Lumabones,

I'm 4 years late commenting but I can empathise with some of your feelings in this post. Me and my husband have just bought what we thought was our perfect first home - however after being in it for only a matter of days, the buyers regret started to set in. I took the week after we moved off work to organise the house and spent two of those days crying in bed. We'll of been in for 2 weeks this coming Saturday and I can't stand to be in it, I'm leaving the house at every opportunity. I too struggle with anxiety and depression and have done for a long time, so I don't know if the massive change and uprooting of our lives has caused my regret OR I it's a genuine regret. When we first viewed the house I walked in & said to my husband "I want to buy this house", but the next few times we viewed it I was impartial to be honest however, he had his heart set on it. Looking back now, I wish that we would of viewed a few more houses before putting our offer in and I'd scoped the area and commute times etc out. I feel so isolated and alone, I'm now 50 mins away from my family & friends and 1hr 15ish away from work, I'm not particularly fond of the area - it's ok but I feel like it isn't a scratch on where we previously lived (my husband is though, as he works there). The house is in good condition, it just needs modernising. Ideally we'd like to extend as the kitchen is so tiny, but cannot afford to do so for the next five years at least. We upgraded from a 2 bed (rented) house, to a 3 bed as we have a 14 month old and 3 cats, but I feel like we are more squished in this house. The neighbours are also very noisy (as we live in a cul-de-sac) and I feel like wherever I turn someone can see me from one of the windows, our previous neighbours were great - basically they became good friends. There's also so much red brick around (not that I have a problem with that) but I feel suffocated, previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free. I also feel so guilty as I know I am lucky to now have my own home and a good life, but I just hate that house. The sickly sweet smell of the person who lived there before just lingers in the air, the kitchen is badly designed, the bedrooms are smaller than what we had before (granted they look bigger when empty). And I know we could've measured up and done research etc. but we didn't and I'm angry at myself for that. As I sit here writing this at work, I literally do not want to go home to that house. I of course want to go home to my husband and child, but not that house. I guess my question is, how are you doing now? Did you learn to love the house? Are you still living there? What improvements did you make?

I really hope you managed to settle OR get out without any really tricky mental health problems.

Hopefully hear back form you soon!

Get some mirror film for your windows, it'll reduce the amount of light you get a tiny touch inside but the privacy is amazing. We live in a house where the windows are right on the pavement and the amount of people who check their hair etc in our windows suggests that the film works!

Never going to match the experience the OP had in their rented property though is it, where they felt like this....." previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free." ?

I'm not quite sure why you think that has anything to do with the house being rented? 

CSI_Yorkshire

RelievedSheff said:

Sarah1Mitty2 said:

lika_86 said:

WafflePancake said:

Hi Lumabones,

I'm 4 years late commenting but I can empathise with some of your feelings in this post. Me and my husband have just bought what we thought was our perfect first home - however after being in it for only a matter of days, the buyers regret started to set in. I took the week after we moved off work to organise the house and spent two of those days crying in bed. We'll of been in for 2 weeks this coming Saturday and I can't stand to be in it, I'm leaving the house at every opportunity. I too struggle with anxiety and depression and have done for a long time, so I don't know if the massive change and uprooting of our lives has caused my regret OR I it's a genuine regret. When we first viewed the house I walked in & said to my husband "I want to buy this house", but the next few times we viewed it I was impartial to be honest however, he had his heart set on it. Looking back now, I wish that we would of viewed a few more houses before putting our offer in and I'd scoped the area and commute times etc out. I feel so isolated and alone, I'm now 50 mins away from my family & friends and 1hr 15ish away from work, I'm not particularly fond of the area - it's ok but I feel like it isn't a scratch on where we previously lived (my husband is though, as he works there). The house is in good condition, it just needs modernising. Ideally we'd like to extend as the kitchen is so tiny, but cannot afford to do so for the next five years at least. We upgraded from a 2 bed (rented) house, to a 3 bed as we have a 14 month old and 3 cats, but I feel like we are more squished in this house. The neighbours are also very noisy (as we live in a cul-de-sac) and I feel like wherever I turn someone can see me from one of the windows, our previous neighbours were great - basically they became good friends. There's also so much red brick around (not that I have a problem with that) but I feel suffocated, previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free. I also feel so guilty as I know I am lucky to now have my own home and a good life, but I just hate that house. The sickly sweet smell of the person who lived there before just lingers in the air, the kitchen is badly designed, the bedrooms are smaller than what we had before (granted they look bigger when empty). And I know we could've measured up and done research etc. but we didn't and I'm angry at myself for that. As I sit here writing this at work, I literally do not want to go home to that house. I of course want to go home to my husband and child, but not that house. I guess my question is, how are you doing now? Did you learn to love the house? Are you still living there? What improvements did you make?

I really hope you managed to settle OR get out without any really tricky mental health problems.

Hopefully hear back form you soon!

Get some mirror film for your windows, it'll reduce the amount of light you get a tiny touch inside but the privacy is amazing. We live in a house where the windows are right on the pavement and the amount of people who check their hair etc in our windows suggests that the film works!

Never going to match the experience the OP had in their rented property though is it, where they felt like this....." previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free." ?

I'm not quite sure why you think that has anything to do with the house being rented? 

Because everything is to do with "rent good, buy bad".

london21

Give it some time.

What do you like about the house for you to want to buy it?

Focus on the things you like.

Give it 8-12 weeks to know for sure if you like or hate the new house. 

MFWannabe

The original post was from 2019 
the OP sold the property last year: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6397101/temporary-coming-off-the-housing-ladder-hold-in-isa-or-other#latest

sold for a ‘substantial profit’ 

Sarah1Mitty2

RelievedSheff said:

Sarah1Mitty2 said:

lika_86 said:

WafflePancake said:

Hi Lumabones,

I'm 4 years late commenting but I can empathise with some of your feelings in this post. Me and my husband have just bought what we thought was our perfect first home - however after being in it for only a matter of days, the buyers regret started to set in. I took the week after we moved off work to organise the house and spent two of those days crying in bed. We'll of been in for 2 weeks this coming Saturday and I can't stand to be in it, I'm leaving the house at every opportunity. I too struggle with anxiety and depression and have done for a long time, so I don't know if the massive change and uprooting of our lives has caused my regret OR I it's a genuine regret. When we first viewed the house I walked in & said to my husband "I want to buy this house", but the next few times we viewed it I was impartial to be honest however, he had his heart set on it. Looking back now, I wish that we would of viewed a few more houses before putting our offer in and I'd scoped the area and commute times etc out. I feel so isolated and alone, I'm now 50 mins away from my family & friends and 1hr 15ish away from work, I'm not particularly fond of the area - it's ok but I feel like it isn't a scratch on where we previously lived (my husband is though, as he works there). The house is in good condition, it just needs modernising. Ideally we'd like to extend as the kitchen is so tiny, but cannot afford to do so for the next five years at least. We upgraded from a 2 bed (rented) house, to a 3 bed as we have a 14 month old and 3 cats, but I feel like we are more squished in this house. The neighbours are also very noisy (as we live in a cul-de-sac) and I feel like wherever I turn someone can see me from one of the windows, our previous neighbours were great - basically they became good friends. There's also so much red brick around (not that I have a problem with that) but I feel suffocated, previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free. I also feel so guilty as I know I am lucky to now have my own home and a good life, but I just hate that house. The sickly sweet smell of the person who lived there before just lingers in the air, the kitchen is badly designed, the bedrooms are smaller than what we had before (granted they look bigger when empty). And I know we could've measured up and done research etc. but we didn't and I'm angry at myself for that. As I sit here writing this at work, I literally do not want to go home to that house. I of course want to go home to my husband and child, but not that house. I guess my question is, how are you doing now? Did you learn to love the house? Are you still living there? What improvements did you make?

I really hope you managed to settle OR get out without any really tricky mental health problems.

Hopefully hear back form you soon!

Get some mirror film for your windows, it'll reduce the amount of light you get a tiny touch inside but the privacy is amazing. We live in a house where the windows are right on the pavement and the amount of people who check their hair etc in our windows suggests that the film works!

Never going to match the experience the OP had in their rented property though is it, where they felt like this....." previously you could see the hillside from our window and all the greenery made me feel free." ?

I'm not quite sure why you think that has anything to do with the house being rented? 

Looks like the OP preferred staying with parents in the end?

Sarah1Mitty2

MFWannabe said:

The original post was from 2019 
the OP sold the property last year: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6397101/temporary-coming-off-the-housing-ladder-hold-in-isa-or-other#latest

sold for a ‘substantial profit’ 

The post says SSTC, is there a link to an actual sale?

MFWannabe

Sarah1Mitty2 said:

MFWannabe said:

The original post was from 2019 
the OP sold the property last year: https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/6397101/temporary-coming-off-the-housing-ladder-hold-in-isa-or-other#latest

sold for a ‘substantial profit’ 

The post says SSTC, is there a link to an actual sale?

Why not spend your time trawling through the post? Are you saying you don’t believe them? Thought you’d have been very happy as they said they’d sold their house and were living with parents while looking for next property 

jonnydeppiwish!

Lumabones said:

Thanks, I actually do love decorating! I'd always get stuck in and help my parents do it when I was younger, my partner has been teaching me how to do some DIY tasks, such as caulking, we grouted the splashback tiles the other day, and we really gutted all of the massively overgrown weeds out of the garden. So I know I DO love getting stuck in, we actually covered the hallway in testers! It was originally gray, a nice one! But just the carpets gray too and I don't want everything to lack colour as you walk in. I'll be painting it myself, because I love painting and I'm pretty good at it.

I am a bit stumped about the other colours of the rooms so far... Part of me wants to play it safe until I know what I want. I guess I'm just looking forward to being able to do odd jobs without everything feeling overwhelming? I was settling fine until these bugs came along... Now I feel like I can't concentrate until that is solved.. I wanna paint the fence and paint a border around the brick on the house and make it look nice.
So surely I must be feeling something for the place still?

I think you just want to make it your own. Pick up some farrow and ball colour charts, some tester pots and choose some different colours we have dimpse, apple green and a lovely pink that goes peach in the sun.obviously They’re expensive and you can get them colour matched for cheaper but o find the paints isn’t quite as good

badger09

@jonnydeppiwish!
Do you realise you’re replying to a post from July 2019?

 

sheramber

WafflePancake   resurrected the original thread hoping to contact the original poster of 4 year ago.

This has led to confusion of two similar situations in some  following replies.