Barking mad relatives!

onwards&upwards

Did your lodger give up their room for the 'wee lass' and her tot then? Where did they sleep?

I definitely wouldn't have been so accommodating if I was paying for my room!

surveyqueenuk

Elinore wrote: »

Ps the wee lass was barely a legal adult, rather shy and seemed genuinely baffled why she had been ushered on a bus.

That's as maybe but you don't end up as a mother of a toddler by being an innocent little thing do you? Assuming everything was consensual, she must have a mind of her own.

Elinore wrote: »

The loose plan seemed to be she would stay home during the day, work in the evenings while staypuft was asleep and no bother - we wouldn't even know she was there. Aunty had been vague on the details.

Er, who was meant to take responsibility for the child? YOU, that's who.

Elinore wrote: »

It appears that wee lass got really chatty with the lodger and exchanged numbers (ostensibly for pictures of staypuft)

Elinore wrote: »

The toddler was just an adorable rolly polly giggler.

Elinore wrote: »

The giggle monster was universally adored

Elinore wrote: »

wee lass is now sending me adorable pictures of staypuft, which is a bonus.

I can't help but feel that you and your lodger are afflicted with a terrible case of "baby blinkers". Yes, the child in question might be cute but can you not see that this has been used in an attempt to manipulate you? Honestly, your aunt is probably thinking "Oh they're a sucker for a kiddy, let's use it to our advantage. She won't be able to say no!". This won't be the end of it you know, it won't surprise me if requests for money or goods start flooding in, eg: "Oh staypuft has got his heart set on a *insert latest fad here*, his little face lights up when he sees one" and "I saw these ickkle wickle trainers he'd look soooo cute in but I just can't afford them".

Don't let yourself get sucked in.

Elinore

surveyqueenuk - you are quite right and she has used children and sad family situations to her advantage before. However me and the OH don't have a penny to spare, so even if I wanted to shes out of luck.

onwards&upwards - the lodger has a mini 'flatlet' of her own (the layout of the house is unusual so she has the ground floor which has a utility, bathroom, bedroom and living room, which has a sofa bed) Lodger didn't mind, as she was there on a weekend, so not technically supposed to be there.

Barny1979 - no apology, the opposite, in fact, we are selfish and self-involved, no family loyalty etc (not to me directly of course)

Pollycat

Elinore wrote: »

Barny1979 - no apology, the opposite, in fact, we are selfish and self-involved, no family loyalty etc (not to me directly of course)

I think Barny1979 posed the question to another poster who posted his experience of his family.

The more I read of families on here the more I appreciate my own small, close one.
I certainly wouldn't be reading or listening to the tittle-tattle of other relatives.

Elinore

Received an email from Auntie. It's polite, very mildly conciliatory but no actual apology.

Its basically outlines Wee Lasses 5 year plan and how by allowing her to stay (FOC btw) I will be investing in hers and staypufts future.

By not charging rent childcare and sundry living costs can be covered by Wee Lass getting a small job that will work around her aspirations.

Very reassuringly they have understood that Wee Lass being without transport would be an issue and they recognise this - so a sum has been allocated to repay the railcard i'll be buying.....

words.fail.me.


Ps - its very detailed and much more involved that just what's mentioned above.

74jax

elinore wrote: »

received an email from auntie. It's polite, very mildly conciliatory but no actual apology.

Its basically outlines wee lasses 5 year plan and how by allowing her to stay (foc btw) i will be investing in hers and staypufts future.

By not charging rent childcare and sundry living costs can be covered by wee lass getting a small job that will work around her aspirations.

Very reassuringly they have understood that wee lass being without transport would be an issue and they recognise this - so a sum has been allocated to repay the railcard i'll be buying.....

Words.fail.me.

w..... O...... W........

Pollycat

Elinore wrote: »

Received an email from Auntie. It's polite, very mildly conciliatory but no actual apology.

Its basically outlines Wee Lasses 5 year plan and how by allowing her to stay (FOC btw) I will be investing in hers and staypufts future.

By not charging rent childcare and sundry living costs can be covered by Wee Lass getting a small job that will work around her aspirations.

Very reassuringly they have understood that Wee Lass being without transport would be an issue and they recognise this - so a sum has been allocated to repay the railcard i'll be buying.....

words.fail.me.

The only word you're looking for is 'no'.
Practice saying it in front of a mirror.
(unless you're happy to have a freeloading niece and child staying with you for the next 5 years).

beedeedee

A friend once taught me how to say "No"....
Before you say the actual word. - say "Err.......No" !
This makes the other person believe that you are actually considering their request - then when they are refused, they think you have a reason (which you don't HAVE to disclose)! It does work, I promise.
If they persist in asking the reason, turn it on it's head and ask " Err....WHY do YOU need to know - it's not for public knowledge". Be mysterious- and stay that way!

-taff

That's nice of her.Did she know you're selling up and relocating to the Outer Hebrides so unfortunately, wont be in a position to look after wee lass...
It could take about 5 years of the plan to organise this though....

GlasweJen

So you're expected to kick out your lodger to house a !!!!!!!!!!? I'd tell her to fcuk off