The Prepping Thread - A Newer Beginning ;)

Toonie

Growing up in east London and frequenting pubs (not clubs though...not my scene) I have to say the behaviour you see in some places by males is very uncomfortable, surrounding a woman at the bar, talking at her on mass, constantly invading her space etc. As a taller than average lass, I can be quite intimidating and I have used this to my advantage when I see other women getting harassed at bars. I'll go over, tap the woman in question on the shoulder and say "I thought I'd help with the drinks" and walk back to her table with her. The fact that I've done this on many occasions is rather sad but it's something I've got used to. Thankfully my local now is a more community minded pub and the regulars in there, whilst they can get a bit tiddly, always have your back, and will help the publicans escort people out when needed.

My Dad had three daughters and taught us all self defence and first aid. He said he would never be able to stop all the bad things happening in the world, but he could make sure we can defend ourselves as well as possible and look after ourselves and others.

euronorris

-taff said:

Yes, there will always be someone who just goes off their head and starts thinking that murdering someone is fine and a good idea. Just imagine, turn the tables a second, do men ever worry about what they're wearing that it might be provocative? Do you see them walking round clutching their keys at night? Do you see them scurrying down well lit streets if a woman starts following them? [and yes, I well aware of male on male violnce, that is not the issue here in case anyone wants to add that one to the mix]

And also, when men are afraid of being followed, mugged, beaten up, murdered, it is overwhelmingly other men that they are worried about doing this to them. Obviously there are instances of women doing this, but the vast majority are male perpetrators. My eldest niece was sexually assaulted by her boss a couple months back. She's too afraid to press charges, as she believes he has connections to local gangs and didn't want to make things even worse for herself. I am DONE making excuses for men who behave like this, like they can't control possibly control themselves (which is insulting to them also!), when they clearly can. I agree, as a society we have to start putting the onus on changing male behaviour instead of continually adding to the list of things women need to do or avoid in order to *try* and stay safe.

Si_Clist

euronorris said:

, as a society we have to start putting the onus on changing male behaviour instead of continually adding to the list of things women need to do or avoid in order to *try* and stay safe.

Yes, by all means let's try and somehow do that.  But at the same time, educate girls that they can't expect "society" to protect them from their own folly. Maybe what we need for youngsters nowadays is social media influencers promoting the idea of being responsible for your own actions ...

And that's it from me on this thorny issue

euronorris

It is NOT their own folly that gets them attacked! The men attacking them do that. Language is important here. By using that terminology, you are implying that the women who have been attacked are to blame and they are NOT.

And as has been evidenced in many, many cases, clothing, being sober, being in a group, being with a 'trusted friend', walking in daylight etc etc etc does not keep us safe.

VJsmum

euronorris said:

It is NOT their own folly that gets them attacked! The men attacking them do that. Language is important here. By using that terminology, you are implying that the women who have been attacked are to blame and they are NOT.

And as has been evidenced in many, many cases, clothing, being sober, being in a group, being with a 'trusted friend', walking in daylight etc etc etc does not keep us safe.

^^ this ^^

A girl in our town was murdered by her friend (male) just over a year ago...  

I'm pretty sure i'd have got in the police car...

Suffolksue

I think, at that time ,most of us would have got in the police car .Not many would now 
looking at the difference in size of them, if she’d said no ,he’d probably have forced her in 

MingVase

Even if every male in the country was given lessons daily on how to treat women, I wouldn't trust that to keep me safe. I'd change my behaviour, instead of trusting them to change theirs. Why get so heated about it Euronorris? I'm sure Si Clist has seen the same as I have - silly wee lassies getting seriously drunk and incapable at 3am in city centres. They maybe need classes too, no?

Suffolksue

Agree Ming  it isn’t right but we have to protect ourselves too 

euronorris

I think the better question is why aren't you more heated about it?! Please stop referring to women as silly wee lasses. It's derogatory and unnecessary. We should all be outraged at the level of male violence towards women. The fact that we aren't more outraged is a part of the problem.

I will take reasonable steps to protect myself, but I refuse to live my life as a hermit and not enjoy the same freedoms as men because some of them refuse to control themselves, and society excuses it.

Floss

euronorris said:
 Please stop referring to women as silly wee lasses. It's derogatory and unnecessary. 

I'm sorry, but really? When those women get so drunk they cannot stand up, when they lose their purse / bag / phone / friend, when they step into the road without looking because they are too busy texting? They aren't "silly wee lasses"?

And yes, I know most of the above can apply to men - locally a 23 year old rugby player died recently on his way home from a night out after stepping out into the road while on his phone.

When I was at high school in the NW during the time of the Yorkshire Ripper, Cheshire Police came into every high school in my town and gave all female pupils & staff self defence classes. I thought personal safety was on the curriculum for PSE, or has that changed?