taking responsibilty to get me where I want to be

ftbwannabe

I hate those bill-splitting moments. I mean, fine if it's just 4 of you & you all had roughly the same, but when it's lots of you & a few people drank loads while others only had salads - never seems fair, & always seems to be the drinkers + dessert havers who call for a split!
Am too tight to even stretch to a burger in the pub at the moment tho, so you can safely discount my opinion.

I agree, & feel you, re the 'as long as it's not going up, i'm winning' approach to debt clearing, especially this time of year. Like you, knocking the impulse spending on the head has freed up a lot more cash for debts/savings, but it's less exciting when it's levelled out & you know there's no more highs coming to speed things up, just steady chipping away. You're doing brilliantly, tho. I like the phrase 'lemonade lifestyle' :-)

efes_shareholder

Its difficult isn't it - I don't mind an even split when its just a few of you but its difficult with a group.
One of the party was a young boy who ate from his parents choices so I asked for them to remove him from the total number as it didnt feel right at all to charge them 3 people when he hadn't ordered any additional food to his two parents


I've made some small additional payments today just to feel as though I have done something - I've paid the accounts down to round figures , so the odd £2.86 etc contribution has been made

And I've rounded the bank account down the same way against the very account

It didn't amount to much but every little helps

Talking of which , I am considering taking from the xmas pot which my mum , my sister and I contribute too for the food and drink , the 25% off when you buy 6 bottles of wine offer is restarting along with the 10p off a litre of fuel when you spend £60 so I am thinking of combining the two

My fuel bill alone this month has been £180.00 so far ,(its a 1.6L for gawds sake) so the 10p voucher would be very very welcome

efes_shareholder

Happy Thursday people

Quite an anxious week as I have a recall back to the hospital for a more obtrusive test for my recent "well womens" check. I have never had a problem before and was quite surprised by the letter , I also made the mistake of consulting doctor google and have predictably made myself concerned as a lot of things I have recently put down to maybe approaching the menopause and IBS could actually be more sinister.
I know its quite common to be recalled and it is more precautionary then anything else but it doesn't give me enough comfort to not be slightly worried
the good news is that I only have to wait a week to be seen so I won't be worried for long

On the spending side , I am trying my best but last night I really NEEDED a glass of wine , Sometimes you just have to let yourself have what you want , so that and a bag of jelly babies equated to a £6.49 spend

I also spend £12.89 on an air purifier for my room - Its something I can't do without as it freshens my room up and gets rid of any sniff of dog or cigs from the mothership

On the subject of Cig's , I have again had a set back so I need to get back on that and stamp it out - If I can do this then I can through to payday on the remaining money in my account

Still deliberating whether to cash in some savings to clear the smaller debts , I think this is down to a lack of patience on my part but I really am not sure that I can be strict on myself to repay the pot

efes_shareholder

Well on a positive its friday

I feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders today , and that my glass is half empty
I hate feeling like this and then because I do it tends to make me a tad emotional - i mean there are people far worse off in this world , I'm not being ungrateful I am just not feeling much personal happiness.
I'm also feeling a bit run down with a going to be sick feeling - maybe thats why I'm also down in the dumps

I'm off sync at work and sat thinking about the things I need to sort out with my life - Everyone here is irritating me and testing my last tolerance
There is always a solution but right now I can't see one unless I upset a few people along the way but I need to start being much more selfish and thinking more of me.
I've got very used to independence the last few years but it would be nice to find a supportive partner who was cheering me on from the sidelines and had my back , we can but wish I don't seem to attract decent man , I need to work on that !!!

Anyway I guess Que sera sera but I just wanted to get that off of my chest

Another plus , a week after filling up , I still have half a tank of fuel , I'm quite impressed by this and not sure how its happened but an extra few days until I have to fill up is certainly going to help with this tight month , Hopefully one more tank will get me through to payday

The only payment I haven't made this month is the contribution to the BNPL on Very - I have set it aside in my savings pot linked to my current account but I haven't processed it yet , It doesn't make much odds but part of me would like to get the full amount to together and send it all at once rather then doing bit payments
I have until the 19th December and two more paydays until then , the balance is £233 of which I have £100 set aside so almost there

And thats me , grumbling , less then jovial and hoping that I can stop being a moany myrtle today otherwise I'll be off in to a corner with a stern word with myself

ftbwannabe

Happy weekend, efes. Hope it'll be a nice chilled one so your shoulders can feel a bit lighter.

efes_shareholder

Good morning

Since Friday evening I have been laid up in bed with a ground breaking temparture , sinus based headache and various aches - Today I am back at the desk , dosed up , figuring that the best way to get well is to get back on with it

This months salary is pretty much disposed off and I have another week until pay day , medicine is so expensive and it was a bit hit and miss finding something effective

All the bills are taken care off so it will be a case of sitting on my hands and amusing myself for the next 7 days - I did pop slightly more in to my savings this month so I do have this as a back up should I really really need it

I've had to postpone my wellwomens follow up due to mother nature , I will be glad when its over and done with and I know what I am contending with , theres so much social media on this particular testing that it does make you slightly anxious when potentially you have a problem

ftbwannabe

Ouch. Hope you feel better soon.

efes_shareholder

Happy Friday

I haven't mentioned the mothership finances for a while and thought I would touch base with it again.
Basically she has herself in a bit of a pickle , I have cut the shopping back to the bare bones however this just seems to be enabling her not to cut back on the smoking ( however very surprising that she can now get to the shop daily to buy them since I now refuse)
I have been keeping an eye on the goings on with her account and every week she is basically spendingher pension and going to the tip of her overdraft , This goes in on a monday and since I do the shop over the weekend , frequently its down to the bare knuckles

If I take my money out of her available cash , half of her pension is on debt repayments - If I ever move out which believe me I would like to at some point in the future just to regain my independence she is completely up brown street
Stepchange tally up tells me she does not have enough to make the payments and that is without taking in to account her smoking

I've tried on a few occassions to get her to confess to the situation by cohercing it out of her but I haven't had any luck

There have also been some irregularities on what she has told me and my sister

I am becoming more and more frustrated with her and can tell a lie a mile off , thats not working well with me either.

I have decided I have to confront the situation with her , not to lecture or tell her off but to try and make this the best we can - She needs a debt management programme

She isnt going to like that I have preyed and she isnt going to like the confrontation but this isn't going to go away and she can't rob peter to pay paul forever

Wish me luck guys , I think I will be on the naughty step

Mummy_bear

Good luck Efes. Always hard having difficult conversations with family, even more so when it's with a parent.

enthusiasticsaver

If she is on a basic pension using half on debt repayments is not sustainable so yes stepchange seems to be the way to go. When 1 was doing mortgage arrears counselling and we went through income and expenditure statements smoking was a big red flag and much as I would have liked to have said it was tantamount to setting fire to £10 notes we weren't allowed to do that. We were told to suggest roll ups as a cheaper option as this was before vaping, e cigarettes etc. Can she do that as a least worst option?