Aligning the Stars

Pink_Butterfly

Oooooo this is all very exciting!!!!

Robin09

Your wedding plan is just what we wanted, but then my sister found out and kicked off a fuss and told everyone. We have big families and we ended up having a smallish wedding compared to some but still 80+ guests, only 4 friends, the rest family members. Really wish we had stuck to our plans though as although it was a lovely day, it wasn't what either of us really wanted.

I loved my engagement ring though, DH sold one of his guitars to buy it. A few years back I put it in the jewellers to be cleaned and they lost it :eek: they offered me a replacement but I didn't see that point as it wouldn't have been my special ring. Ended up with compensation and spent it on doing our garden up and buying the DC a big climbing frame :rotfl:

An action packed honeymoon to America sounds fabulous!

Starmummy

This month has been spendy.

I had thought about going under cover for a couple of months and not updating until I had things back in line. But I'm doing this diary for me and I know that just wouldn't help.

I've not been frivolous I've just spent some money a little bit earlier that I had managed to save it. I'm not sure how this will all play out until all transactions are clear. It just means I really need to be mindful the next few months.

My biggest expense was finally buying a bike to commute to work. £560 spent...this should mean that StarChild no longer needs to attend breakfast club at school so I'll save c.£60 a month. I had started saving for this but I'd only got £80 in the 'bike fund'. The rest I shall have to pull out of my EF. Not what an EF is for and this makes me nervous ( daft really as I never had savings before this year) I paid for the bike on my credit card as it was a big ticket item. I'll pay it off when my statement comes. That way I can earn a few pennies interest and have time to put a bit more in the EF to make up the short fall on payday.
I also had to pay £150 in exam fees to resit my last exam. I can't get resits reimbursed from my training agreement at work
Then I had the dentist- only a check up £42 I'd budgeted £39, it's gone up. I have a history of good dental hygiene so it's a once a year expense thankfully.

I am still inline to be debt neutral this year but spending so much money makes me so anxious. I am so aware that in the past this would have been a slippery slope and another few grand of debt would have accumulated after. I hope I can break that spell. I just really don't like the fact that my numbers don't seem to have moved at all this month. It feels like failure.

Our grocery spend in our joint account was £340 for April. That is insane, especially considering Mr Star has been away 2/3 of the month. It's just been convenience and snacking- and bank holiday ciders. (stopping to get essentials at the M&S services after our holiday, not meal planning, replacing sleep with sugar). I feel so disappointed in myself for not keeping in control.
I must get back to about £250 this month.

Also, does anyone else notice how expensive the last term of the school year is? I have club fees to pay out for the term (youth group, 2 swim groups, drama and gymnastics...it's a lot but SC hates the after school club (that I also pay for :eek:) it comes to about £20 a week- I suppose I never really added that up before, thank goodness she is an only child. I suppose that's why we do it, clubs are her social life, friends are her siblings, we both work long hours and it's lonely for her. Plus she has always been a terrible sleeper and unless we completely wear her out she wakes me 4-5 times a night. £20 a week for the chance to sleep is worth it. She attends 2 lots of swimming as she swims for the county. She is really really talented. I guess this is an investment (much like my 6am alarms on the weekend)

SC is also complaining her school shoes hurt. She is a size 4 at 9 years old...i think it might be simpler to cut off her toes :rotfl: I already bought new school trousers, shirts, sandals, shorts and summer tops this spring. She is so tall and slim the cheaper shops just don't fit properly.


The other thing that will hit this payday will be the increase in pension contributions. I am all for getting a good pension and I don't begrudge this payment. However, had I passed my last exam the related pay rise would have offset this difference. As it is I'm about £40 down on last month.


moan moan moan :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Normal service shall resume shortly I hope.

on a good note.
I LOVE my new bike, I t is so easy to ride and hopefully it will bring me and MrS closer, he has been banging on for years about how he wants to enjoy his hobby with me.

On another good note, MrS is loving being home and I am loving having him here. There are far less stressed out or cross words being had and he is much more cuddly..and he brings me tea in bed each morning. I am still a bit worried for him though. His mental health is a bit fragile. He seems a little lost still and keeps crying for no real reason. I am gently trying to encourage him to go to his GP or counselling, he won't, but at least he feels he can open up to me and it does seem to be helping. I do love the silly fool so much and it breaks me to see him like this.

Right another day another essay :rotfl:

Take care
SM

[Deleted User]

I'm so on the same page as you. We got married almost 6 years ago and it was just what we wanted.

We got married at the registry office (which is a beautiful historic building in our city) at 3pm (that way we didn't have to deal with lunch haha). Then we had a party in the bar where we had our first date. We gave them each guest two free beers and had stew and mac and cheese for food. I made pick and mix bags from Costco sweets as favours.
A mate of ours did the music (he's a DJ), another mate took photos. Yet another mate drove us around for the day in his old car. I made some simple decorations with stuff from IKEA and Home Bargains and we had cake pops instead of a huge wedding cake.
We didn't have speeches or bridesmaids or anything like that. I made the invitations myself and didn't have to deal with a seating plan or anything like that - there was no stress at all. Everybody still says they had the best time at our wedding as it was just a really fun party with everyone, and we really got to spend time with everyone too, rather than sitting at the head table.

We had 120 people there (mostly OH's family and friends).

We then flew to Germany (my home country) where we had a big party with another 100 people (mostly my family - we both have huge families!) at the local village hall. Everybody brought a dish for the buffet and my brother's friend did the music.

I wore a simple short dress I bought at Coast for £140 (and sold it for £100 on eBay after!), made my own bouquet from origami flowers and didn't have an engagement ring (I feel the same as you about jewellery!). Husband had a suit custom made through a cheap Chinese website.

All in all, we spent less than £2.5k on both of these wedding parties, all our clothes, food, travel etc.
And we had a great time and still remember it fondly.

There is no need to spend tens of thousands of pounds on a single day, especially if that's not what you want. I completely agree on the centre of attention in a big pouffy dress thing - my worst nightmare!!

Good luck with whatever you decide!

Starmummy

That sounds really lovely M. to keep two parties and the legalities under £3k is impressive.

redofromstart

The bike sounds like an excellent investment - I assume you have some kind of insurance and a good lock?

I am of the 'hate being centre of attention' school. Nice outfits, bare minimum of people, short ceremony in tiny building in lovely gardens, and good lunch in local outstanding food pub. 13 sat down to lunch, but luckily nobody but me remembers who stood up first Worth looking for small places - think we paid under £200 (venue) for ours to be in a place that was special to us..

Starmummy

Starmummy wrote: »

I've updated my signature. I'm so close to being in the 9's debt wise...I'm going to make that my goal for the next month. In 4 weeks time I shall be in the 9k's.

My 'net worth' is -£7,790
slowly getting to my debt neutral target. I WILL hit it by the end of 2019!

Well I didn't get into the £9k's.
Financially it seems to have been a bit of a miss this month.
I've just totted up the figures and my net worth is now -£7,733
Nowhere near my targets! but at least I'm better off than last month even if it is only by £57. it's all in the right direction isn't it?
I still aim to be debt neutral by the end of the year. 8 months to go...so I need to see an average of £966 paid/saved a month :eek: I CAN do this!

Starmummy

redofromstart wrote: »

The bike sounds like an excellent investment - I assume you have some kind of insurance and a good lock?

I am of the 'hate being centre of attention' school. Nice outfits, bare minimum of people, short ceremony in tiny building in lovely gardens, and good lunch in local outstanding food pub. 13 sat down to lunch, but luckily nobody but me remembers who stood up first Worth looking for small places - think we paid under £200 (venue) for ours to be in a place that was special to us..

That sounds like exactly the type of 'wedding' I want. I just want to be married..and I'd never say no to dinner :rotfl:

We now have more bikes on our home insurance than there are people in our house . (Mr S has 3!) and we have a plethora of different locks. I can keep it in the warehouse when I get to work so it's safe and dry.

Starmummy

So, I'm not going to get disheartened by my lack of progress in April. The numbers didn't change much but I managed to buy a road bike and take a foreign holiday without adding to debt so that should be seen as some kind of success.

I'd like to replace some of my depleted savings and try not to let the spending bug takeover. I'd also like to reign in on the grocery/household spends. Final figures for the month were £354.87 :mad: that hurts.

So goals for May will be

1) No personal spends in May
*2) Try to spend under £225 in Groceries
*3) Get net worth into the -£6k's

Starting with number 2, I spent £4.19 on lunch bits to keep in my desk drawer (soup, cereal bars, bananas) If i can do that each week this month then my lunches will cost less than £25- or less than £1 a day.
SC already has packed lunches and MrS tends to take leftovers. I always just eat something at my desk and used to do a mini shop to last a week but last month I slipped into buying 'nice' salads and sandwiches. It all adds up.
Dinner tonight will be a bit of a pot luck just using up bits and bobs. I'll do an Ald1 shop tomorrow. Mr S did pop out for milk bread and bananas this morning. I'm not sure how much was spent.

As for no personal spends- if I pay back what I want to in savings this leaves me £78.80 in my account after all bills, clubs, S/O's etc. I am hoping not to spend any of that so that I can push more to holiday savings for next year. We shall see how well that goes. I've told Mr S I'm reigning it in to repay savings so I hope he can respect that for this month at least.

Starmummy

I felt a little superhuman yesterday. I got so much ticked off my list.
*work
*1h study
*1h reading
*walk to work and back
*4k run
*school admin
*school pick up
*meal plan
*food shop
*cooked dinner
*called my sister
*updated May budgets
*arranged a date night for later this month
*booked tickets for SC's play at the local theatre
*done a wash load, dried and put away
*went to bed on time

I even managed to summon the energy to swim 50 lengths before work this morning.
If only I could be so productive all the time :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

So meal plan goes to 8th May- the food shop should cover this for dinners and most breakfast/lunches. I will need to spend about £5- £10 on bread, fruit, milk, soup and butter by Monday.

Grocery budget looks as follows:

£51.48/£225 so all on target.


Take care lovelies.
SM