Aligning the Stars

Pink_Butterfly

Hey SM!! Lovely to hear from you, I’ve been wondering how you’ve been getting on. Sorry to hear about the separation. It’s nice that you’re still friends but I imagine it’s been tough to deal with, especially with everything else going on in the world. Congratulations on the house! That’s amazing and so kind of Mr Star to loan you some of the deposit! 😊 Take care x

Debt_Me_Out_Of_Here

Hi Starmummy, it's been a long time since you've updated your diary. I hope you are ok. 

Star_Mummy_2

Hi DMOOH

thanks for your message.
I've not logged on in ages, life just gets in the way.

I've been in my new job 15 months now which is crazy. It's been, and continues to be, full on, but I'm still enjoying it.
I've also been living in my house 7 months and I've been a busy bee. I've repainted every single room, other than the hall and cloakroom. I've even refitted a new kitchen all by myself (except having the plastering done and spotlights and hob fitted by professionals)
This means my debt has gone up slightly and is currently sitting at £11k.- cost of kitchen and other necessary household costs.
However this is on a super low interest loan (3%) and the work I have done has increased the realistic sale value by at least £20k on what I actually paid for the house.

Covid has put a pay to any other exiting news. MrS is still wonderfully involved with SC. both him and his family treat her as his own, he has her one night a week still and helps out with clubs. We get on well but zero regrets on splitting up.

I'm not dating but I do have a little flirtation with an old friend which is good for mental health. I'm actually pretty happy with this situation. I don't have the time for an actual relationship, i really don't want the responsibility of another relationship,  and I'm still working on myself and all the life changes that happened last year. But this little flirtation gives me company and attention once a week which suits us both perfectly. How very modern.

My mum, however, is thoroughly concerned that at almost 33 I may be leaving myself on the shelf. I don't feel the need for marriage though. I have my own house, I've got a good pension, I pay all my bills, I don't want more children, I like my own company. Never say never, but marriage just isn't one of my life goals. I think I'm too independent and possibly too selfish

SC is as wonderful as ever. She will be 12 and starting secondary school in the autumn, she's grown into a beautiful young woman (all five foot 4 of her). She back to full swim training now with pools open and competitions are back on the horizon,. We will make an Olympian of her I'm sure.

Star_Mummy_2

Looking at the first post from 3 years where my debt was £16k, my current debt level of £11k looks like slow progress.
It's good to take an holistic approach though.
The reality is in March 2018 my net worth was -£16k
My net worth today (excluding pensions) is +£26k

That's £42k in 39 months!!! I'm pretty flipping ecstatic at that!

Star_Mummy_2

Of course SC bio father is still a complete tool and not providing any parental support at all.
In fact in the last year he has contributed a whopping £349.44 in maintenance- declaring he is on benefits- reality being he is working cash in hand and driving around in a Mercedes, snorting a load of coke and drinking too much with his very young choice in girlfriends. gross!
SC decided last year she didn't want to see him any more- he doesn't make her feel good, she doesn't trust him etc etc. 
I continue to be the intermediary for communication ( the once a month text he sends to try and make me feel sorry for him)

WelshKitty85

It's good to see you posting again @Star_Mummy_2 and sounding so positive 

Debt_Me_Out_Of_Here

Sounds like you've had an eventful year! I agree, marriage shouldn't be anyone's life goal, you sound like you've got things sorted as it is so why jeopardise that!

Star_Mummy_2

Hi All,

 I hope you are well.

It's my birthday next week, what have I done to celebrate? contact the payroll department at work to max out pension contributions. It's crazy to think doing this only reduces my take home pay by £50 but increases my monthly contribution to my pension by £225! why didn't I do this sooner? 
Well obviously because short term need was putting a roof over my head, and making that roof habitable.

The expensive house things should be done for the foreseeable- everything else is merely a want. So I need to put away my bank cards and hunker down for the next 6 months. Restart good habits, overpay the credit card, only spend on needs and stop and reflect on wants!

In other grown up news, I finally sorted out life insurance. I know, I know! I should have done this when I bought the house. But now SC is protected financial should the worst happen, my parents have the info they need (as my next of kin until SC is 18)

All that is left to do is to write a will- which I am prioritising before the year is out.

Work is still ridiculously busy, I am still enjoying it. I'm studying two professional qualifications, and training for a physical challenge in October. So keeping myself occupied.