Prosperous soul in the making

badmemory

I agree to keep the will simple.  You could even make them joint executors.  They will still have good contact with your ex so he should hopefully provide a steadying hand.  Don't involve solicitors as they will still have to do all the real work.  The person writing your will should ask you all sorts of "what if" questions, some of which you will not have thought of.  They SHOULD also ask you competency questions!

EssexHebridean

On the will, it's pretty standard to assume that money will not get paid to kids until they reach 18, or 21 - I've even seen 23 used a fair bit. Assume you will be using your sister/BIL as executors so the holding of money in trust shouldn't be complex really - I'm not quite sure why the solicitor dealing with it is suggesting that there would be such a high extra charge for that bit of wording - it's not like you're asking the firm to act as trustees is it? 

savingholmes

Thanks @badmemory and @EssexHebridean

Agreed at least 21 for DD. She doesn't want right of residence either. Spoke to DS too. Think will just do simple will and non binding letter of wishes.

Started with streaming cold today thanks to DD. LFs clear though.

At hairdressers masked... But think will skip balance class. Need to buy tissues on way home. Chicken noodle soup too. Typical as I have a few days off. I am going to have to do some work though...

MovingForwards

Good decision about the wills, when things have settled you can make a more informed decision, but for now just get the basics down.

Hope you feel better soon.

savingholmes

Thanks MF. I need to call him Monday - I kept forgetting to call him back.

Well today - I got a beautiful tiffany floor lamp for £35 that is similar to ones I've seen in antique shops for £150 so was very happy although it was a long trek to get it. I also bought an already upcycled bureau for comparison with the one I bought the other day... It was only £20 - so not a huge risk... This one still had its key which is nice. The person had put new knobs on - which I don't like but - could sell or use on a different piece. I will probably upcycle it my style eventually but it reasonably fits with my front room colour scheme and fills a gap so it's fine for now. Trying not to take too much on at once. 

Ex is dropping the dog off for a few hours tomorrow. I would have cancelled as I'm unwell but DD is looking forward to it. I miss my dog but it is amazing how quick you adjust. The first few days I keep looking around for her. It's very quiet without her - and the cat seems confused - but other than that it's been okay. I am already walking less though - although TBF I'm not feeling great. 2 x LFs clear though.

I am trying to get a special mirror on FB. I've seen it selling for £90 and it's listed for £20... so here's hoping I get it. It's really pretty from around the 1920s... My current dinner set came from a charity shop - mostly - so thinking of taking it back - and getting a nicer one LOL from either that or from FB. I've seen a pretty blue china one but I'd have to travel - and I'm not sure if I have energy. Could perhaps get it on way back from dropping DD on Monday if it's still available. I would want to collect more of it though - which is the danger point. 

I think I've said - my house doesn't reflect my true style so trying to do something about that with s/hand / vintage furniture. Will then potentially let go of some of my existing furniture... The letting go bit is hard for me... Keep having to tell myself - that I'm making room for something even better. I need to start photographing some of what I have and put it up on FB and see how that goes... That will then also replenish my 'kitty'.

All in place to complete Wednesday. Decree Absolute will probably go through early next week too so all on track to be free very soon! Hoping Ex returns keys tomorrow. MIL has one - and I want her's too... I had hoped to use my extended weekend off to decorate but no way I can cope with any kind of paint fumes right now. I'm due my booster jab on Tuesday - I'm wondering whether they will even agree to give it me. Just have to hope I'm doing better by then. I have moved my dentist appointment. 

mark55man

well done SH getting through everything and keeping your morale up and plans progressing.

I had a really busy week, so bit behind on diaries, but always good to get to the weekend and catch up with everyone

Tahlullah.H

Could you not ask your BIL to change the lock instead of having to ask them for the keys?

SandyShores

You're going through a lot savingholmes so don't be too hard on yourself re. getting rid of stuff.  Its taken me a long long time to let go of some things, especially anything connected to people who aren't around any longer.  But I'm building my own space now, with things that I have around because they make me happy, (not just because I'd feel guilty about not keeping them).  I've just treated myself to something really practical, but it also looks gorgeous as well - it probably cost me £30 more to get the more lovely looking item, but its worth every penny.  Keep going, we are all rooting for you.

BellaLasagna2018

Tahlullah.H said:

Could you not ask your BIL to change the lock instead of having to ask them for the keys?

This was going to be my suggestion. Keys can be duplicated. Excuses can be made for not handing over sets of keys. New start, new lock. Possibly less hassle. 

Lifestartsat40

I echo what others have said - it seems you have a lot on your plate at the minute so try to be kind to yourself and here's to a fresh start