Prosperous soul in the making

Bargainhunter30

We do peppers, grated carrot and grated courgette and it tastes amazing. I've started replacing the pasta recently with courgetti and haven't missed the pasta at all. 

I think lots of people like the idea of being a millionaire, but in reality once you're debt free SH, you'll have a much higher disposable income and more choices. But I think you'll also make more thoughtful choices.  From RHPH I always enjoy what the rich families take away from the experience - usually that they work too much and don't spend enough time together. Health, family and time are so much more important than having excessive amounts of money.

savingholmes

Thanks BargainHuntter, Tahlullah, WelshKitty and Hugglemonster
Glad I stirred some debate. I agree BH - the rich people do learn things too. One of the things I have been looking into in the last year or two is how to develop a 'miilionaire mindset' so that we learn to keep and use the money we have appropriately, The programme showed people's disposable income and gave clues to what they did with it - but that's all. The viewer assumes the rest. One group near the end were visibly ostentatious but for all we know the others could be paying off their mortgages quicker etc - as this was their disposable income after minimum payments... 

I bought some 'million pound notes' a while ago and have one stuck on my fridge. On my laptop is a sticker that says 'every day millionaire'. I think what I've learned in the last few years - is that it's not what you make - it's how much you keep that counts (and potentially the legacy impact of what you give away). I used to be someone who self-sabotaged our success - and I am trying to become someone who could handle wealth. I don't think God/the universe gives you more wealth than you can handle. They reckon if you redistribute the wealth to make everyone equal within an incredibly short period it would be back in the hands of the super-rich as they've learned how to handle money and keep it.

Books I read last year by Graziosi and by Ekker - both suggested that you need to honour the rich in your mind - rather than bad mouth them out of jealousy - if you ever want to become rich yourself. When I hear stories of what appears to be outrageous wealth - I've tried to bless them in my mind - rather than assume they have screwed someone else over to get it. Ekker in particular says rich people have a 'both' rather than 'either or' view of the world. So they don't assume they have to give something up to be wealthy. I agree we've also all heard the stories of people who work 12 hour days or more as millionaires - and I wonder what the point of that is. But there were people on the programme who had found a better balance. Most of the books do agree however that you are likely to have to work long hours when you first start out. 

Those of you who have said - we will have amazing disposable income once we're debt free - you are right too. DH would like to go on a USA road trip on a motorbike down Route 66. Maybe that can be more than a dream - since he's willing to wait a few years to save for it and potentially go with a friend. If we work longer in traditional jobs - we can have more money to spend on nice things as well as investing in the future. We'll have choices... and security. If we take the plunge once we've got some money behind us into something new - a whole new unknown world could open up - some of the options could pay poorly or not at all - but maybe it would level out long term... It's nice to know that we won't be 'stuck, trapped, scared' like we sometimes feel now - and that instead we will have a new level of freedom.

I am trying to make a compelling enough vision of the future - that I am willing to make some short term sacrifices to get out of debt quicker... Now to apply the same strategy to my weight... and health and fitness...

MovingForwards

Being rich doesn't have to be about money and wealth.

In my last permanent job I earned more than I ever have before, or ever will again, but it didn't buy me happiness.
My last job I earned half of the permanent job and was so much happier as I had something money couldn't buy, that was time. 

The trick is finding what you really want from life, working out how to achieve it, then doing it.  You will then be a millionaire, maybe not to your bank but within.

savingholmes

Well DD has successfully dyed my hair again. Feel blessed. I have completely overspent on groceries for tomorrow - my excuses £19 on one-off dog food (12.2kg) so will last months. £3.75 on washing powder.. but I've spent more than that. Either need to live within budget for groceries the rest of the month or accept that this is how much groceries are and budget accordingly. DS should get paid again towards the end of next week - and then hopefully he will be buying £80 of his own meat a month which will make a difference... Will see how things go. We have reduced takeaway spend - and no school dinners or lunches out for DH - just noticing more this month because I've repaid so much. The EF will be impacted but some of that is down to conference cost. Hopefully will do better out of next payday - when start to pay some of that conference cost back out of personal spends.

SandyShores

Hi savingholmes, just catching up on your diary.  I have a chilli con carne recipe which uses oats.  I have a scoop in my oats - so put 2 or 3 scoops in depending on how much I make.  I made some cottage pie earlier and decided to try a couple of scoops in.  I have to be quick when I do it as DD saw me once and said she didn't like it (yes its very funny how she has been eating it and liking it for several years).  Anyway, the cottage pie was 'delicious' so I will definitely be doing it again.

I like the idea of honouring the rich in your mind, its better than getting caught up in envy.  And you are right, we have no idea what someone else is doing with their money or whether they are in debt.  I've tried to be really open with family about money now, because I don't want them to make the same mistakes as us.  I'm not sure about the 'both' mind.  I can kind of see it, but I felt that living on a strict budget was the only way to pay my debts down.  Perhaps I was a little too strict, as I've ended up in a job that isn't very fulfilling apart from providing a decent living and pretty good conditions.  

@MovingForwards, I agree with you about feeling a richness in life, and it not being to do with money.  I've had jobs where I would want to be there as long as I could, and others where I couldn't wait to get out of the door.  I need to find a balance where I've enough to live on, but am motivated.  Still looking and still hopeful

Sandy

Honeysucklelou2

So true MF. I work less hours in my main job due to a period of such stress with it that it affected my health and sleep. It’s better now but having less hours means I have time to have more quality time  with my children and time to “stand and stare”. 

savingholmes

Hi MF - I too have taken lower roles in the past to be closer to home and spend more time with family. My DD then was about 7 and letting me know by illness and acting out that she needed more parental attention. I have wanted different things at different periods in my life - partly dictated by the needs of our kids. I know I don't 'travel' well so a regular long commute (more than 30 mins) is not for me. After 3 years I got promoted from within into my current much higher paid role. Personally I found working at a lower level more stressful due to lack of autonomy and boredom. I now work for a family friendly organisation - currently from home - but even before the latest crisis was allowed 1 day a week from home.

SandyShores - I am not suggesting that we currently have our cake and eat it. I am trying to send upto 60% of our income to debt repayment at the moment - so I am not talking about twice as much spending. If you listen to Eker's book - it's more that we assume that to earn more money we have to trade time away from family - his approach would be to work out a way that that doesn't have to be the case. Assuming that family time is the value that matter's most to us. You would pick your top value(s). Now my kids are older and more independent - new options open up for me.

HSL Love the idea of time to stand and stare - and don't make enough time for this but know I could. I am in awe you work at all with the number of children you have.

Another £75 payment has gone off debt.

SandyShores

Hi Savingholmes, I wasn't really thinking about having cake and eating it .  I was so focussed on paying off the debt during my debt-free journey that I definitely missed out on some things in life.  I also wouldn't entertain buying a house until we were done with the debt, and in the back of my mind I wonder if I shouldn't have been so strict and stressed about it all.    Perhaps we should have bought the house earlier and been a bit braver, but I was so determined to get out of debt (we had several light bulb moments so it was a long journey).    I know its all woulda, coulda, shoulda on my part, but it is good to reflect and learn, and grow, so I've ordered the book.  Its coming from the States (few pounds cheaper) so won't be here until March - but that gives me chance to read my other books first and its something to look forward to. 

MovingForwards

I totally agree lower paid jobs are less tasking on the grey cells. I'm bored silly, but it provides the balance I need, doesn't stop me missing the thrill of the chase like I used to do. It's totally different when a family group are involved, as a parent your family are priority.

Blackcats

Really interesting debates on here recently.  I'll admit to sometimes feeling a superficial mild envy of people who appear to be financially well off - but that's such a simplistic view.  I don't know whether they are up to their ears in debt, are working all hours in a job they hate, have inherited money but lost a love one.  So it's helpful to think differently. 

And to add to the discussion on work - I'm in the best paid job I've ever had but it's the least fulfilling and enjoyable .... but .... it's currently a means to an end so I can cope with it.