Things can only get better

Keedie

Oh I'm sorry for Mr SA, he must have been scared and in pain when he was stuck and I can only imagine how shattered you must be. I think the role of a carer is such a hard and often overlooked one, and the ongoing dynamic change in relationship is a lot to keep navigating.

I think it's great that you have carved out your own space as a sanctuary and I don't think it should be compromised on. But perhaps there's an integrated solution? I was on MSE when your bathroom was done, so not sure how it was done/paid for, but a hybrid bath with a shower door may be the best of both worlds? They're not cheap, but unsure if occupational health could review the situation because of his falls, and perhaps contribute or fund it? I'm sure there's cheaper alternatives, but this is an example of what I mean, https://www.victorianplumbing.co.uk/milton-luxury-walk-in-1700mm-bath-inc-screen-fold-down-seat-front-end-panels?campaign=googlebase&PS2PVV1=18474&gclid=Cj0KCQiAsoycBhC6ARIsAPPbeLtfAC9iZ0G310yiX1yJL7wp-XR4i2u9tBuPjI9LQeXdpZm9K73Mf_8aAtZTEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds. Perhaps Mr SA could have a removable stool in there?

I have an electric bath lift, which sounds great, but it's awkward to get in and out of the bath and I've been trying to see if I can have it taken out and put in a shower instead, but the council aren't responding... 

Sun_Addict

I found the bath board and have installed it so that will be a help. I’m going to try and get an OH assessment for him for the right equipment needed in the bathroom. They know what sort of rails are best. However I’m not holding my breathe as I am well aware NHS services are cash strapped and he might be waiting a very long time for an assessment. 

The Christmas tree is up, but nothing else. I’m not really feeling very festive today. Mr SA got up at 11, came with me to take the dog for a run on the park, had some lunch and went back to bed. It’s alright for some 😡

I’ve only got a 4 day working week as I’m off Friday to meet some retired friends for lunch. Looking forward to that plus having a potter round town first. I’ve got to keep planning things to look forward to or I’d go insane. 

IzzyBee

You have a lot on your plate caring for someone is one the hardest jobs going I know I had a taste of it a few years ago when my hubby had a accident and I felt like walking out of the door and just keep walking you really could do with some more support but I know he is as stubborn as my hubby and wouldn’t have anyone in enjoy your meet up Friday and keep planning things for yourself just to keep sane big hugs SA

sashybo

Sending love SA, glad you have lunch with your friends to look forward to. 

Seasidegal58

Glad to hear you've got a nice lunch out with friends this week. Enjoy!😀

Makingabobor2

Hope you have a great lunch with your friends. I don't know anything about Mr SA's condition or anything, but I know when I broke my shoulder, me & DH nearly fell out big time as I couldn't do anything much and he was trying to work 50 hours a week and look after me and help in the house as well. So I can only think your situation is a lot worse. So do take time for yourself and get all the help that the social services or NHS maybe able to offer you.  x

milann

Keep planning those things to look forward to. 👍

Cherryfudge

I'm sorry to hear about Mr SA getting stuck and your sleepless night. I think the grab rail and an OT assessment is probably the right way to go. Even if the NHS can't afford much, some bathing aids are relatively inexpensive and might be worth buying yourself (like a seat to put in the bath), but of course it has to be the right thing.

I hope today is better.

satchmo1

When my ex was recovering from his awful car crash, I put a plastic garden chair in the (admittedly large) shower cubicle, which helped. 

When my mum was living with us, I bought a grab rail that fitted to the tiles by suction - but it wasn't very secure if it was over the grouting. Plus she was only tiny, and very careful - and I don't know if it'd be any use for someone larger and rather clumsy.

My downstairs neighbour (93) got stuck in the bath once, and was there for nearly an hour. I heard her panic alarm and went down and helped her out of the bath. 

Become a squeaky wheel with Occupational Health for that assessment, and maybe get Mr SA to keep ringing them (several times a day, lol) to ask when they are coming.

foxgloves

@Sun_Addict - I think an Occupational Health assessment would be well worth having. I expect the waiting list is pretty long, but if you could push that Mr SA is currently a danger to himself, I wonder if it might help inch you up the queue? IT's a shame he doesn't like doing the suggested exercises as improved upper body strength would probably be a help too, especially as he is a big build.
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