Can't afford a baby :'-(

warby68

I also meant to say the Debt Free board is brilliant if you want people to look through your Statement of Affairs to see if there is any way to cut costs or manage differently. The advice can be blunt but kind and supportive.

When you stress how badly off you are it seems a little extreme for your income if you've already minimized living expenses - worth a try

EndofTether

Well, he started a call centre job in november which is variable shifts so a part time job for him wouldn't work. Besides, he looks after his children 2 days a week and 2 evenings a week. He can get upto 2k a year in bonuses which are sales related so not guaranteed - or even realistic to be honest. He was in retail mangement which pays really poorly and it took him 3 months to find a new career. The jobs market is seriously hard at the moment.

EndofTether

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

Don’t you mean add to the family? There are already two children.

#
Yes - but they are not MY family. We want to start OUR own family.

EndofTether

stoozie1 wrote: »

52 weeks mat leave all paid at the same rate sounds really unusual/unlikely OP. Are you sure it isn't 1 rate for 6 weeks, then 6 months at xxx, 3m at SMP and 3 unpaid?

My staff handbook just says this:

Female employees who have been continuously employed for 26 weeks or more by the end
of the 15th week before the expected week of the birth of their baby are entitled to: -
receive statutory maternity pay for up to 39 weeks;
take a further 13-week period of additional maternity leave, making a total of 52
weeks’ leave.

Doesn't mention figures so I assume it's basic rate?

kazwookie

You could move in to the house he pays for and the ex moves out, and you both look after the children.............

fairy_lights

EndofTether wrote: »

Re. Mortgage. Its a rent to buy scheme. He pays mortgage part and housing benefit basically pays her part. I hate that he still pays it but he doesn't seem brave enough to confront the issue.

And therein lies the problem. If he can't afford to keep paying the mortgage on a house he doesn't live in then he needs to confront the issue.

Red-Squirrel_2

EndofTether wrote: »

#
Yes - but they are not MY family. We want to start OUR own family.

Your future stepchildren and siblings to your own future children aren't your family? That's a shame for them, and for their dad.

spadoosh

EndofTether wrote: »

My staff handbook just says this:

Female employees who have been continuously employed for 26 weeks or more by the end
of the 15th week before the expected week of the birth of their baby are entitled to: -
receive statutory maternity pay for up to 39 weeks;
take a further 13-week period of additional maternity leave, making a total of 52
weeks’ leave.

Doesn't mention figures so I assume it's basic rate?

That means 6 weeks of 90% of your average weekly earnings. And then the lower of 33 weeks of £140.98 or 90% of average weekly earnings. Then 13 weeks unpaid.

Amara

Red-Squirrel wrote: »

Your future stepchildren and siblings to your own future children aren't your family? That's a shame for them, and for their dad.

I think it's harsh to OP. She may love her partner's childern and be the best step-mum to them, but they are not her children, they're partner's and his ex's. She wants children on her own, what's natural.

OP , your partner needs to discuss paying mortgage with his ex. If he can't do it, he can't do it.

ViolaLass

What solutions does your fiance offer to this situation?