On-line dating experiences?

Oakdene

mariposa687 wrote: »

Oakdene, that happened to me with a guy I was chatting to except he asked me for coffee, I said yes and he changed the subject so I just blocked him. If someone asks me out I always reply even if it's not the response they would have hoped for.

See, that I can take. If you're genuinely not interested at least have the stomach to say "That's nice of you to offer a drink/coffee/food but I am going to be honest & say I'm not interested".

AubreyMac

Gavin83 wrote: »

How much did they exaggerate? :rotfl:

I genuinely don't understand why someone would lie about something that was obvious the second you met them. A slight stretching of the truth maybe but if you're telling people you're 25 and you're actually 45 I think they'll notice.

I've never used online dating so I'm curious. Do they ask for any vital stats to display on your profile?



Fair enough. I can appreciate why you're somewhat cautious now then!

I met a guy who lied about a good 6/7 inches. Now height isn’t THAT important to me but I was just put off that he lied about it at all.
I think height is important for a lot of women though which is probably why men tend to lie about it. I’ve seen a lot of men’s profile state along the lines of….”I’m 6ft1, apparently that is important”. Some sites ask for this info and some don’t. If this info is not shown I will eventually ask before meeting.


I’ve also had men exaggerate about their jobs too. One guy told me he was an architect but it turns out he worked in IT and his title was ‘technical architect’. He admitted he lied to make it sound more interesting as he felt IT sounds geeky. Now a persons job doesn’t bother me much either (although ambition is important to me) but it just pees me off when they lie about things they can’t really get away with.

As a side note, I have heard that taller people (particularly men) do tend to get better (senior/more well paid) positions in the workplace.

AubreyMac

Oakdene wrote: »

I got chatting to a really nice lady who lives quite close to me, & after a couple of days we starting chatting on Whatsapp rather than the dating app. We spoke for around a month or so & I asked if she would like to meet for a drink sometime & she said yes. I messaged her the next day & asked if she was free on the Friday for a drink & I never heard back from her...

That's happened to me a couple of times too but it was the guys who asked me out. What was the point of that? A-holes!

mariposa687

AubreyMac - I was chatting to a guy for a few weeks on Whatsapp. His chat was getting a bit boring as he kept going on about how busy he was blah blah blah. One day he asked me for coffee, so I replied saying that I'd love to when would they like to meet? Then he said he was looking forward to meeting. Then his next message was some generic, 'hey how are you?' etc as if the previous conversation didn't happen. I didn't get that at all! What was the point?

Gavin83

AubreyMac wrote: »

I met a guy who lied about a good 6/7 inches. Now height isn’t THAT important to me but I was just put off that he lied about it at all.
I think height is important for a lot of women though which is probably why men tend to lie about it. I’ve seen a lot of men’s profile state along the lines of….”I’m 6ft1, apparently that is important”. Some sites ask for this info and some don’t. If this info is not shown I will eventually ask before meeting.


I’ve also had men exaggerate about their jobs too. One guy told me he was an architect but it turns out he worked in IT and his title was ‘technical architect’. He admitted he lied to make it sound more interesting as he felt IT sounds geeky. Now a persons job doesn’t bother me much either (although ambition is important to me) but it just pees me off when they lie about things they can’t really get away with.

As a side note, I have heard that taller people (particularly men) do tend to get better (senior/more well paid) positions in the workplace.

I totally agree, the lying would put me off too. I don't understand why people would think they can get away with such stories. I'd just be honest and if someone rejected me based on a certain characteristic then it just proves they weren't right for me anyway.

Your job example confuses me too. I could understand if he had a traditionally low skilled job but a technical architect is anything but. In terms of salary it's probably on par with what an architect would earn anyway!

In terms of success I'm not sure it's purely height, it's probably the overall package. I think traditionally better looking people are statistically more likely to be successful. Now if this due to bias or them having extra confidence is a matter for debate, I suspect it's probably a mix of the two.

I do believe that dating is the one area that people are allowed to be as prejudice as they wish so if a woman wishes to reject a man based on his height, or a man reject a woman based on her weight so be it!

MataNui

AubreyMac wrote: »

I’ve also had men exaggerate about their jobs too. One guy told me he was an architect but it turns out he worked in IT and his title was ‘technical architect’. He admitted he lied to make it sound more interesting as he felt IT sounds geeky. Now a persons job doesn’t bother me much either (although ambition is important to me) but it just pees me off when they lie about things they can’t really get away with.

That's an odd one. A 'Technical Architect' would be a senior very well paid position. Probably better paid than your average 'Architect'. If i was the sort of person who cared that much about my partner having any interest in my work (to consider a 'Technical Architect' a bit geeky) then i doubt i would really be on a similar level to them anyway.

Not really sure what all the fuss is anyway about jobs. My wife didn't finish high school (so has a job that pretty much matches her education level), I have a 1st in Computer Science. She has no interest in my job and i don't really care about hers. Been married for years and couldn't imagine being with anyone else. Obviously household income is a fraction of what it would be if I was married to someone with an equivalent professional level job but so what? We manage fine. Clearly, its all about money in the end.

AubreyMac

Before this I have never heard of a Technical Architect before.
Any job can be given a title to make it sound posh/amazing. A ‘financial transaction Executive for a global brand’ could just be a cashier at McDonald’s!

Gavin83

AubreyMac wrote: »

Before this I have never heard of a Technical Architect before.
Any job can be given a title to make it sound posh/amazing. A ‘financial transaction Executive for a global brand’ could just be a cashier at McDonald’s!

You make a good point and you do get a lot of meaningless titles in IT. However an Architect role in IT will be someone who designs and plans the layout for IT infrastructure, the person who steers the future developments in their chosen area. It needs a lot of knowledge and experience. As MataNui said, it's a senior role and I'd expect it to be paying good money. In the right company in London you could expect to earn not far off £100k a year in that kind of role. It's a level above what I do (I'm a Database Admin) and I certainly do alright!

It's a really weird thing to lie about when you're doing so well but people are odd at the best of times.

AubreyMac

That’s techno jargon to me


When I meet new people I reckon half of them do IT related jobs. How many IT jobs are there? I’m convinced the IT folks in my workplace don’t do much, they seem to just sit around and fiddle with equipment and deliberately malfunction it just to give themselves something to fix.


Having said that though, I hope they aren’t monitoring my internet usage during work time!

Gavin83

AubreyMac wrote: »

How many IT jobs are there?

Hundreds. It all fits under the IT banner but there are a tonne of distinct jobs, some of which are totally different to others. There are some IT jobs I wouldn't have a clue how to do, although I'd probably still be better than someone in a totally different industry.

Personally I'm extremely busy, as are most but you'll get quiet days and other days where the poo truly hits the fan and it becomes incredibly stressful. It's the nature of the job.

However I'm starting to get a little off topic here!