“Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.”

joeyjimbles

So glad to hear you making these plans. And completely agree that looking after littlest is full-time carer. I hope you find what works best for all of you.
I have a tiny plea that you won't add ex-OH to your list of people to look after. Not my place, I know, just don't want him to take advantage of your good nature.
And don't forget that if you have a little more (spare) time, then you could also look into some of the other online ways of making money. You seem to have such a knack for it - have to say that e-rewards, PA, Qmee et al have enabled me to pay for a lot of stuff over the last year.

charlies_tribe

Wannabe, you are completely entitled to stay at home to ensure your little girl gets the care she needs. I'm sure your mum would see you are doing what is best for the children and yourself.
If you do take the leap tomorrow to say you are taking tome out, please contact everyone asap so you aren't left with no money coming in again. Tax credits, housing council Tax, make a claim for carers allowance.
When D'S was little I felt bad being at home but I know I couldn't take care of him and hold down a job, even now he's a teen, it's hard work!
Good luck with whatever you decide, but it has to be because it's best for you and the children and not best for your mum or anyone else xx

Cherryfudge

If you go for the '12 months out' option, if you wanted to ask about doing relief work you still could - but having any small child is a big job in itself and one who needs extra care is certainly going to use your time and energy. Not that you need me to tell you that.

I hope you can begin to get at least a bit more sleep. I know I feel better when I manage more.

Honeysucklelou2

I don't know if this benefit rule is still the case but about 10 years ago I set up a small business with the ex ( not involved in it now at all) . My friend was widowed with 4 children and was in receipt of benefits but she was allowed to earn a maximum of £20 a week without affecting her benefits. She worked 3 hours a week for us which we could be flexible with so it could fit in with school holidays or her children's needs. If you took a year out and this £20 a week option was still valid, could you become self employed or employed in a small capacity? Hope this makes sense...just trying to think of every option.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Sounds like a very good decision Wannabee, it will relieve some of the pressure on you.

beanielou

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

Sounds like a very good decision Wannabee, it will relieve some of the pressure on you.

Agreed

Cherryfudge

Just looking at the other side of things for a moment... I think going out to work and having the children see the example you set has been very important for you. If you don't go back, try to get that structure/routine that you mentioned earlier, and build in opportunities to go out even if it is for a naughty paper cup of coffee! Explain the decision to the children in terms of this being your job and the Government pays you (through the DLA) to look after your smallest one's additional needs and you like that because it gives you more time with them all (or words to that effect).

That sounds as though the Government pays you to go out for coffee... think I need sleep.

Chrystal

Hope you're getting some decent sleep Wannabee, that your mind is more settled, and that tomorrows meeting goes well. I find that sometimes just making a decision, one way or the other, lifts a weight from the shoulders.
Take care honey, we're all rooting for you. X

UncannyScot

Morning Wannabe

Have a grand day missus
We've got your back luv
(((((HUGS)))))
:A

Busy_Mee1

Just wanted to pop in to say that I hope all goes well today. If you do decide to take a 12 month carer’s break from work then you could consider doing some volunteering once your little one is well enough to return to school.

Volunteering would give you a lot of the things you would miss by not going to work - you would get out of the house, meet new people and have a sense of purpose outside of your family. I think it would also appeal to your very giving nature. You could chose what you did and when, but there wouldn’t be the same level of commitment as a paid job x

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