Estate agents phrases you love to hate

CP26

My bug bear phrase is 'must be viewed to be appreciated'... so far this has meant it's a bit weird and you'll need a good imagination.

Also hate random close ups of features like taps or the fireplace, and of local landmarks like the church or a statue. I just want to see what the whole room looks like and a close up of the church spire tells me nothing.

Rizla300

‘Ready to put your own stamp on this property?’ = Are you prepared to sink £15k-£20k updating which is already overpriced?

LittleMax

"in a sort after location"

and why do they still put "low level wc" as though it is a feature, when it's been pretty standard for the last 40 years? In fact most of the wc's they now describe as low level are actually close coupled!

I would have thought only a high level cistern was noteworthy, I had to explain to my niece and nephew recently what Nanny meant when she asked if they had 'pulled the chain'

Owain_Moneysaver

Surrey_EA wrote: »

I once saw a house advertised as having a coy carp pond in the garden! :rotfl:

The last thing you want is sexually uninhibited fish jumping up and waving their bottoms in the air when the vicar's called round for a bon vivant buffet with al fresco munchiettes on the patio.

ancientofdays

"Hello My Eager Househunters"

Good morning strangely patronising estate agent.

NaughtiusMaximus

For some reason, this listing made me think of this thread:
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-70299629.html

"WOW! WOW! WOW! EARLY VIEWING MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!"

badger09

NaughtiusMaximus wrote: »

For some reason, this listing made me think of this thread:
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-70299629.html

"WOW! WOW! WOW! EARLY VIEWING MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!"

'Rear Garden
Large rear garden mainly lawned with paved patio area, panelled fence, gate to front' pic 20 :cool:

lincroft1710

NaughtiusMaximus wrote: »

For some reason, this listing made me think of this thread:
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-70299629.html

"WOW! WOW! WOW! EARLY VIEWING MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!"

NO! NO! NO! apart from possibly bathroom, absolutely nothing wow!!

moneyistooshorttomention

NaughtiusMaximus wrote: »

For some reason, this listing made me think of this thread:
http://www.rightmove.co.uk/property-for-sale/property-70299629.html

"WOW! WOW! WOW! EARLY VIEWING MOST HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!"

???? Translation imo being "Well one could live in it - whilst doing necessary work on it. It ain't terrible - but it ain't good either".

moneyistooshorttomention

badger09 wrote: »

'Rear Garden
Large rear garden mainly lawned with paved patio area, panelled fence, gate to front' pic 20 :cool:

Nope.

Can't see the "large rear garden". I can see a passable size rear garden - with very noticeable view of an "industrial" building beyond it.

But no sign whatsoever of a "large rear garden".:rotfl: