should I be worried or am I just being silly re. 2yr old

greentomato

Hi mummy2one, there is some really good advice on here so all I wanted to add was I would really really recommend going to a mother and tots group. These groups are great not only for your own peace of mind, but also because it really helps the children with their socialisation skills, learning to share, play together, and of course learning from each other.

I've been taking my DD to one for quite while now, from even before she had her MMR, and I always come home feeling much more relaxed about things after seeing how the other children are behaving!

bexsta-star

Ok Mummy2one I have read this post and I think that you think that something is wrong!!! I am guessing at Aspergers Or Autism. If that's what you are thinking them take him to the GP, be asertive and tell them a) that you think that your child is Aspergic/Autistic Why- symptoms/behaviour etc/ (look on the websites available and see if you child ticks any/all of the boxes) C) You want tests - now and immediately and D) What can you do to help your son?? This sounds severe I know but you would not have posted this thread in the first place if you did not suspect something was wrong. I write from experience, although not from this issue. My dd fell over a lot when trying to walk and after a number of people had mentioned I took note, approched my HV and, to cut a long story short she was eventaully diagnosed with Right Hemiplesia !!!!!! Cerabral Palsey (in other words she is now a normal 17 year old pain in the !!! who had to wear a splint on her leg for 4 years and had a big operation at 13!!!). If you have any worries what so ever ask for help. It will be given - trust me I know!!!.

PS - This may be a load of rubbish - your son (and I also have a 4 year old whose speech is rubbish and he wets himself all the time) is more than probably "perfectly normal". Kids develop at different rates and in different ways. However I would say again if you have any worries about your childs development ask for a referral. It might be scary (again I know because I have done it) and the answer might be pants (again ditto) BUT at least you have done something about it- not sat on the fence or ignored it. If (and in all likliness there is nothing) something is wrong then the sooner he starts treatment the better.

BE STRONG, BE ASSERTIVE AND most of all LOOK AFTER YOURSELF.

fsdss

mummy2one wrote: »

I'm a regular lurker, plucking up courage to post.. here goes

I have a 23 mnth old and I'm just getting a little more concerned about his development, I'm a first time mum and don't have anyone to really turn to to ask advice apart from the hv who seems little interested, so I wanted to sound you all out to see if I'm just expecting a lot from my baby or if these are signs of something else

What kind of ages should he be doing things and when is his development a "problem"

he's not saying words yet, not mum or dad or bye bye hello anything but he does babble and aaargh and shout iyswim. He's not very good with food, can't do finger food apart from little organix crispies and biscotti's, shows absolutely no interest in picking other food up and putting it in his mouth, he'll hold a spoon but not do anything with it but his pincer type finger tip movements are awkward & chunky & he shows no interest in holding a cup

He's walking fine and loves to go out so I know thats no problems, but he doesn't point or wave at anyone even me & daddy. Although he does flap, by that I mean that he loves buses, well, the wheels as he loves to see them turning around when they move and when they do, or something catches his attention that he likes he flaps his arms and bounces up and down in his pushchair

He'll play with his toys for a little while but really only interested in the toys with wheels or toys which spin (like his spinning top), not bothered for shape sorter etc but give him something like a friction powered car that whizzes around he's happy.

He's a happy cheerful little thing and I've no worries that he's not happy but I've just started to become more concerned about these things and that they're perhaps not normal as I overhear other mums on buses etc saying their dd/ds isn't yet 2 and they sit there saying hello, car, bike etc etc and feeding themselves things and drinking with a cup etc & I'm sat here thinking is there something I'm really failing miserably with and just not doing my little boy justice from being rubbish at this parenting thing.

I understand you can't really diagnose anything from a forum but I'm just looking for anyone else I suppose who's going through anything similar or from just anyone who can offer support

hi mum2one

i am a qualified and experienced child development worker, i do health and development checks for 2 year olds.
if you came to me i would be concerned and would monitor (via the health visitor) on a 3 monthly basis of his development.

the first thing i would be doing is a referral for a hearing test and speech and language therapy. depending of what i had observed i would be looking at the possibility of referring to a paediatrician to monitor development.

the guidelines for development of this age (although some children vary) and bear in mind these are guidelines

• saying 2 -3 word sentences
• can identify pictures (i.e famililar faces)
• can imaginary play (such as brumming a car on the carpet)
• can build a tower of 3 bricks
• can pick small things using a pincer grip (should have been tested on 9 month check)
• ability to feed themselves (hand eye co-ordination) either by hand or using utensils
• can control a cup
• can walk without and limps or clicks of the hip

there are other guidelines but i think these are more suitable for you.

mummy2one_2

Thank you all again for your help and support. Yes I suppose at the back of my mind I am thinking Autism/Aspergers. Tbh I know little about these conditions and I only did a little looking into them when I saw a post on here which something rang in my head as hmmm that could be DS, so I looked around (I know google is a minefield) and some of the things he does are there, hence my concern. I don't know if we have a 2 yr check, I guess we do but I'm going to call my hv/gp on Monday to discuss things and see if I can get somewhere.

On the little list, thanks fsdss, he does no.3 lots and lots lol, and would say that he's ok with 2 and the very last one, I did mention the pincer grip on his 9 month check but nothing was said that this wasn't normal at that age or to keep an eye on it

eeyores61

dd (my youngest) was nearly three before she produced recognisable speech. She babbled but seemed to use different sounds each time so I couldn't even get used to 'baby words' for things. After speaking to the health visitor she was given a test which was postponed twice and was finally given just after she'd decided to give in and use normal words. I sat there with this little madam who'd been referred with speech problems chatting away about "daddy got baby in buggy, push nice baby, in park....the ducks go quack" and getting filthy looks from hv! (yes i can remember word for word - I was highly embarassed:o )She was late with toilet training too, but now in top sets at 14. They really all do develop at different rates, but I think you should keep mentioning it, for your own peace of mind if nothing else!

hm2be

My son was diagnosed with autism earlier this year at 2.1 Speech is such a red herring. Everyone was always asking me "is he speaking yet" and telling me "don't worry he will catch up". The thing is with all that emphasis on speech I missed the fact that he had no shared attention- didn't point things out to me or look to see where I was pointing.

One tip I will give is make sure you are taken seriously at the doctors many parents are fobbed of as neurotics. Trust your instincts. Make notes and give examples of the behaviours that worry you. Ask for a referral to the paediatrician.

If you want any more info feel welcome to PM me.

fsdss

mummy2one wrote: »

On the little list, thanks fsdss, he does no.3 lots and lots lol, and would say that he's ok with 2 and the very last one, I did mention the pincer grip on his 9 month check but nothing was said that this wasn't normal at that age or to keep an eye on it

it is routinely checked on a 9month check, to establish whether a baby is grabbing at something small or using their finger tips (co-ordination etc).


for example will he pick up little bits on the carpet?

another thing springs to mind - do you do everything for him? by that i mean feed him, baby him. without realising it you could be talking for him.

if you came into my clinic and i saw what you have described, i would make a referral to all (speech hearing paediatrician). not because of any suspicions that your child may be on an autistic spectrum or have aspergers, but my first gut feeling is his hearing. the reason i state this is that we are unable to balance and co-ordinate ourselves when we have a hearing difficulty which can present itself at any time. this also interferes with speech and language development, makes a child feel unwell and to over compensate the child will use visual stimulation more to develop (like liking spinning wheels etc).

i have recently heard from a parent that when i was faced with a similar position earlier on in the year, the diagnosis was adenoids. the child had them removed and speech, concentration and finer mobility skills had improved rapidly.

mummy2one_2

Yes, that's what I'm saying they asked about it on his 9 month check. I'm not sure if you mean that it should have been checked visually? For his 9 month check, my DS played on the floor with a toy whilst the HV asked me questions, is he feeding from a cup, does he have finger foods, does he perhaps pick fluff from the carpet or does he play with my earings or necklace etc. to these questions my answers were all no but I just presumed that was normal. He wasn't crawling at that point, but he began shortly afterwards and started walking ok.

I'm going to speak to HV on Monday though to see if I can get an appointment to see her to go through my concerns, I'll make a list like you suggest of my concerns so I don't forget anything too.

Thank you all again for your continued help. I'll let you know what happens Monday

quietheart

best of luck with your call mummyofone. When my son was 18 months we thought he might be on the autistic spectrum, we were wrong but at 6.5 he has just been diagnosed with dyspraxia, so we were right that something was up, we were just uninformed as to what. Trust your instincts and don't be fobbed off. I can't tell you how many times I was told my son would grow out of his difficulties....

mummy2one_2

Thought I'd update after speaking with HV today. Called and had a lovely talk with the HV who said that yes he would have a 2 year check up but obviously as I was concerned they could bring that forward. I told her all my concerns and worries and she agreed that to try him with mums/tots group, perhaps slowly at first, half hour or so to see how he gets on, she also said that she would certainly think of referring him to speech/language therapy from what I'd said. If I remember rightly I think she said it's usual for a 2 yr old to be able to say about 100 words. She passed my details to the paediatric nurse who does the 2 year checks so that she can flag me in sooner. (She actually called about 10 mins later with an appointment next Monday) The HV said that she would probably recommend a hearing check to make sure he can hear properly and said that perhaps glue ear might be a thought. She was very helpful and understanding and said I was right to raise any concerns to her and that not that there is anything major wrong but if there is, then it's better caught now rather than later.

I'm going to try him at mums & tots tomorrow, the HV said it might be a bit daunting at first as it is very busy and very noisy but just see how he goes with the other children.