The Edcawber Principle

Science_mum

Hi Ed, glad you are all on the road to recovery. On DD birthday front we attended a brilliant home one recently which involved pass the parcel and a mini disco (which just involved Utube Frozen songs on repeat and an Disco LED light bulb available on Amazon for about £10!) and traditional party food. The kids just loved it and we had to buy our own Disco bulb because my daughter was so impressed with the Disco lounge at her friends house! Some of the mums were talking about how glad they were to be going to a low key party as it put less pressure on them to book the bouncy castle etc...

We have home parties too as my kids prefer it, (as they like to show their friends their rooms and toys). I won’t lie, it’s alot of hard work and I have always taken a day of annual leave to prepare for the party but looking back those parties hold alot of lovely memories.

There is a lot of inspiration on Pin interest for other ideas. I did pirates theme one year with a treasure hunt ending at our sandpit (were I had hidden chocolate coins). (that was very popular and I had to do it again the next year at the birthday boys request).

edinburgher

Science_mum, sounds lovely, exactly the sort of thing I wish we were doing! Unfortunately/fortunately, DD is a very sociable child and our house is tiny...

Science_mum

Good for DD having lots of friends. I understand the space issue, before we bought our semi we were in an 11 foot terrace. I am sure you will come up with a great solution.

edinburgher

Child benefit has been paid, so that's £82.80 paid off a CC. I remain very conflicted when it comes to using DD's money to help pay off her parent's debts, that's £1,300 or so we owe her now. Not wanting to go through the pros and cons of what CB's for again, just venting

Off to my training session in an hour, it's a lovely bright morning for the walk there.

Suffolk_lass

I well-remember the year we went for a large picnic for DS's birthday (at the end of May) - it rained. We brought the disposable paper cloths into the lounge on plastic sheets and had an indoor picnic with pass the parcel (small things and a bit of jiggery to ensure each child got at least one thing), with each layer holding a small token, and other traditional games. HM birthday cake that everyone thought was a Furby (remember them?) - it was an owl cake but I smiled sweetly and thanked everyone for their compliments - at least it tasted great and we knew what was in it! - Anyway, it was as good as it could be and at the end, all the mess was wrapped up in the cloths and thrown away within 20 minutes. I have to say, some of the big parties were easier but this is the one we all remember.

Good to see you back, fit and recovered and still making the overpayments.

choccielover

Kids parties are getting out of hand...and I fully recognise I’m one of those people perpetuating the myth so honestly, don’t do it.

I don’t think badly of those people who either don’t have parties or do lovely home made affairs, I envy them!!!

I’d keep it simple and child centric, they don’t need much to occupy them and don’t go mad on the food, a simple snack box affair is fine. After this years eye watering expense I’ve declared it a biennial event and we can go on a long weekend holiday on the “off” years. I know which I’d enjoy more but actually I reckon dd would too!!!

edinburgher

It does seem to be an arms race, doesn't it? I've already declared for biennial (or less frequent).

Mrs E seems to think that because I'm a bit awkward with lots of kids (I'm not really, I just don't get all gooey over them), we wouldn't be able to herd a group of kids. I have more confidence, but it's not worth arguing at this point.

I'm not sure where the line between my limited social life (not a big fan of spending money on expensive meals/nights out) ends and thrift begins. I suspect I have a bit of a blind spot, so Mrs E will have her way

Suffolk_lass

Sometimes it just comes down to "Happy wife, Happy life" and you just have to let it go, I guess.

edinburgher

Suffolk_lass wrote: »

Sometimes it just comes down to "Happy wife, Happy life" and you just have to let it go, I guess.

We did have a talk about it and I pointed out that I felt that we are at odds financially, with her being far too willing to spend money we don't have yet and always wanting to point out the small areas of positivity around our finances. She countered by saying that she felt she had to do that because of my "gloomy narrative" around finances.

I'm not sure. Like all things, the truth probably lies somewhere between our two opinions and I have the humility to realise that I can't see which view is more realistic. On the other hand, I have a niggling certainty that maths is maths and I'm "right" in terms of the challenges facing us :think:

£2.79 paid off a CC.

Science_mum

Hi Ed, I too am not a natural kid herder but 3 year olds in my experience I incredibly easy to look after on mass. Mums will never leave them so you aren’t actually responsible for them; they are extremely bribable with party food and frankly just going into someone’s house is a massive adventure for them as they entertainment expectations are very low! As long as your place is reasonably kid proof it’s absolutely fine. You could literally just have them in the house for 2 hours, buy a caterpillar Cake or 3, sing happy birthday and the kids would be delighted ( this is basically what we did for our DD birthday). In our old wee house we had 15 kids and mums at my sons 3rd birthday... it was May so we used the garden for overspill. My only 2 recommendation of what not to do (both learnt at that party).

1) don’t offer wine to British mums at 11.30am at a kids party - they think it’s weird. My husband is Portuguese and it’s normal there for parents to drink around kids and he had started offering booze to all the parents before I could stop him:rotfl:

2. Don’t get a paddling pool out without warning the parents before hand; again my husband thought it would be “fun” to get all the kids in the pool midway through the party as it was really hot. Most parents thought it was fine but a couple were annoyed about getting speacial clothes wet. Whoops!

The kids thought it was all brilliant fun and had a lovely time.